Offed
by dcatpuppet
Summary: Ever wondered what happened to the Muppets that were known a few years back but never seen again in future productions, like Sam & Friends, Muppets Tonight and Jim Henson Hour. Zoot and Walter are going to find out. WARNING: Some parts might be a tad bit dark and there might be evidence of some slash pairings in it.
1. Prologue

**Summary: Ever wonder what happened to the Muppets that were around a few years ago, but were never seen again in later productions, like Sam & Friends, Muppets Tonight, and Jim Henson Hour? Well, you're going to find out. WARNING: This story might seem a tad bit dark in some parts.**

* * *

><p>It happened on January 25 in 1986, just four days after <em>"The Muppets: A Celebration of 30 Years" <em>had aired on television all around the world.

A black hearse car had parked on an old concrete bridge that was so far outside of the city of New York that nobody seemed to notice there was even a bridge there. A man stepped out of the car and went to the back of the hearse, where usually the coffins were put, and pulled out three wooden crates, all somewhat small.

Then, a woman stepped out of the passenger seat. She wore a black suit and had a white eye patch, which covered part of a scar that seemed to be on her eye, but the eye the scar was on was hidden. She also had black hair with white streaks in it that reached just past her shoulders.

She was accompanied by Kermit the frog, who wore a trench coat, hat and scar to hide his identity. He appeared nervous and had a tinge of guilt.

He shook his head at the crates and said, "I don't like doing this. I don't want to do it."

The woman looked down at her with angry eyes and said, "Remember the deal frog; if you want to survive being a Muppet, along with your friends, we have to do this. Or, perhaps I kill off every single Muppet in the world?"

Kermit jumped in fear and reluctantly said, "Alright, you win! Just…let me say goodbye to them."

"How can you say goodbye? They're unconscious," the woman sneered, but Kermit walked up to the crates anyway.

To the first one, he said, "Yorick, you may have had quite an appetite, and you may have tried to eat me a few times, but you're still my friend."

To the second crate, he said, "Harry the hipster. You were the Muppet that inspired the Electric Mayhem to join the Muppets, mostly Dr. Teeth. I'm very glad that you had the chance to meet them a few days ago."

To the last box, Kermit took a deep breath before saying, "Sam, on that day at the swamp, when you asked me if I wanted to join you on your show _Sam & Friends_, I didn't think it'd get me anywhere to be honest, but it did. And I thank you for getting me into acting and helping me create the other shows like Sesame Street, the Muppet Show, and all our movies. It meant a lot to me. I hope you don't take this personally and you'll understand what I'm going through and why I have to do this."

Kermit then walked back over to the woman, where he watched the man pick up each crate and throw them into the fast-moving river down below. Kermit cringed three times, one per crate that was thrown. The frog stood on the edge of bridge and watched as the boxes flowed away. He was tempted to jump in and retrieve them, but that had dire consequences; one is that the woman had a gun on her and would kill him and all the other Muppets, and two was that the river was moving very fast and if the bullets didn't kill him, drowning certainly would. Even if he was a frog, frogs have their limits on how much they can take.

"Are you ready to go, Frog," the woman asked.

Kermit, still staring at the river, nodded and said, "Yeah, sure Zia." The amphibian celebrity entered the hearse, along with the woman and man, where they drove a U-turn on the bridge and started to head back to the city.

Meanwhile, in the river, the crates had fatefully washed up on a riverbank, where they were unmoving, until one of the crates started to move around, as if someone was trying to break out, and finally, the top of the crate was forced off and a bald Muppet with big ears and eyes wearing a sports jacket emerged from inside and looked around. "Kermit! Where are you?" the man asked, climbing out of the crate. He was Sam, of Sam & Friends.

The last thing he remembered was he, Harry the Hipster and Yorick sitting with the frog at the counter in the canteen, where Kermit offered them drinks and after taking a sip, Sam felt dizzy and passed out. Then, he heard banging from two nearby crates, where he heard Harry and Yorick's voices shouting.

Sam used all of his strength and struggled to open one of the boxes, which eventually part of broke off and a purple skull popped out. He was Yorick, the first Muppet that was known to gobble up everything that was in front of him.

"Yorick, do you think you can eat open that crate?" Sam asked his friend.

Yorick jumped out of his crate and looked at the one that contained Harry the Hipster. After a few moments, he glanced at Sam and nodded. The Muppet started eating at the crate slowly at first, gradually getting faster by the second, until finally, he was nothing but a blur to Sam and within moments, there was nothing left but a black Muppet with white shades sitting on the ground, looking surprised and Yorick picked at his teeth with a toothpick, which he subsequently ate. He was Harry the Hipster, from Sam & Friends.

Harry looked at his surroundings, very confused, and asked, "Hey Sam, where the heck are we?"

Sam looked around again and answered, "I don't know, Harry. I don't know. All I can tell is that we all passed out from that drink Kermit gave us, and woke up in crates, that, judging by the dampness of the wood, was tossed into this nearby river and had luckily beached on this riverbank."

"Sounds like Kermit was trying to kill us for some reason," Harry assumed.

"No, Kermit isn't that sort of person. He's always been the nicest frog around," Sam stated. "Someone had to be forcing him to do it, but who."

"If they did it once, do you think they'll do it again?" Harry asked.

Sam thought to himself for a few seconds before saying, "I don't know, but I wouldn't be surprised if they did."

"Should we go find Kermit?" Harry asked. "Or Jim maybe."

"I don't think that's a good idea. Whoever forced our friend to do what he did probably wanted us dead and they might try to kill us if they see us. So I think it'd be better if we hid a while until the public assumes we're dead," Sam said.

Harry and Yorick nodded and looked around until Harry spotted something. It looked like the entrance to a cave, so the Muppet decided to enter and looked around. He ran out, grabbed a piece of dry wood and quickly struck it on the edge of a rock, making it light on fire and become a torch.

"What are you up to, Harry?" Sam asked his friend.

"I fink I found fomefing!" the hipster exclaimed with his mouth muffled by the torch.

"Let me take the torch," Sam said, taking the torch from his friend's mouth.

"I said, 'I think I found something'," Harry repeated.

Sam, Harry and Yorick entered the cave, where Sam looked around to see they were on the ledge of some sort of rock formation. The trio looked around until they found a ramp that led down. Sam felt the wall, trying to keep his balance, until he felt a hole. The Muppet stopped and looked inside, to see it was a small cave that was the perfect size for one room.

As he, Harry, and Yorick went further down into the cave, they found more empty room-like caves, all the same size, until they made it to what appeared to by the bottom of the cave.

Sam looked around, to see there were bigger cave entrances, with bigger rooms. He eventually found a pile of sticks in the center of the room and lit them, which illuminated the entire cave, revealing that there were small and large caves on every floor, almost like a stone apartment building.

"Wow, incredible," Sam gasped in awe.

Then, he heard someone shout with a French accent, "Hey! What's the big idea, lighting all ze lights?" A light gray rat entered the room, wearing a black beret and blazer, sunglasses and a cigarette on a cigarette holder in his mouth.

"Pierre?" Sam said, surprised.

"Sam?" the rat asked, also surprised.

"You know this rat, Sam?" Harry asked his friend.

"Oui, I am Pierre, the French rat. The very first Muppet," the rat named Pierre replied.

"You were the first Muppet, the very first? I thought Sam was," Harry admitted.

"Non, Sam was not first. It was me. I taught Sam everything I knew about performing, which he used to create your show Sam & Friends," Pierre stated.

"Yes, I wanted to tell you about it, but I couldn't find it. It was like you disappeared off the face of the Earth. Nobody knew where you were," Sam explained.

"And now you know where on Earth I am. Happy, oui?" Pierre said.

"Well, sort of, but I'm confused about you ended up here," Sam admitted.

"The same way you and your weird friends ended up here. Knocked unconscious, stuffed in a crate, and thrown into a river to drown, and sometime later, I woke up trapped in the box and broke out. Very sad, it is," Pierre explained.

"But why? Why did that happen to you? Who did it?" Sam had to know.

"Well, I actually went back into the city to find out, and I found out that a woman named Tia offed me while you were rising to fame. I was not popular enough, so she tried to kill me and make the public forget about little Pierre," Pierre explained, sounding sad.

"I would never forget you, Pierre. You inspired me to be who I am today, or who I was back in the late 50s," Sam stated.

"Mercí, Sam, mercí," Pierre said.

Harry then said, putting all the pieces together, "So wait a second, that woman Tia tried to kill us just to make sure everyone forgets about us and…to make the modern Muppets more popular."

"Exactly, my hip Muppet, exactly, except that I don't think that woman that killed you was actually Tia; I saw everything and she was too young. Tia should be dead by now or a very old woman at least. Now, who are you hip person and purple skull guy?" Pierre asked.

"I'm Harry the Hipster, and this guy here is Yorick," Harry stated proudly.

"Bonjour, I hope you like it in the caves. I have plenty of room here and it'll be where we live for possibly the rest of our very lives," Pierre stated. "At least, until we figure out how to get back with the Muppets."

"How long will that take?" Sam asked.

"Until we can confirm this new woman and her offing group's location and alert the media by radio, which might take a long time," Pierre said.

Harry and Sam looked at each other for a few moments before Sam said, "Pierre, nobody listens to the radio that often anymore. They all like television now."

"Really? Well, how about that. Okay, once we get the right equipment, we'll wait to get the information. Until then, we'll wait to see if anyone else gets offed. If there's a lot of characters in your generation, Sam, Tia's daughter or granddaughter might go for them next, and we have to be ready to save them," Pierre stated.

"I'll do it. How about you guys?" Sam asked Harry and Yorick.

"We're with you, Sam," Harry said as Yorick nodded.

"Then let's go," Pierre said.

* * *

><p><strong>Well, this is the prologue for my new Muppet story. I hope you liked it. What will occur in the future for the Muppets?<strong>

**Please Follow, Favorite, and/or review!**


	2. Dr Teeth and his Saxophonist

Nearly 30 years later, Dr. Teeth was walking around the city of Los Angeles, taking a stroll. The Muppets had celebrated their success about Muppets Most Wanted the night before, and now nearly everyone was sleeping in.

Dr. Teeth decided to get up early and take a walk, since it's not often he got some alone time. Sure, he liked his friends, but sometimes he likes things quiet. He went through the park, checking out the plants and the birds flying around, searching for their breakfast, until he heard what sounded like a saxophone. The keyboardist investigated the park, until he saw someone sitting on the bench.

It was a female Muppet with peach skin and long blonde hair tied into a braid. She was playing a tenor saxophone, like the one Zoot had, and to be honest, she played very well! Dr. Teeth debated whether or not to approach her, since for all he knew, she might end up being a Muppet fan and she'll freak out and pass out, which will attract a lot of attention!

The band leader sighed and was about to leave until the girl stopped playing saxophonist and looked at him. "Oh, hi!" she greeted.

"Uh, hi," Dr. Teeth replied.

"You're one of those Muppets right? Dr. Teeth?" the girl asked.

"Yeah, that's right!" Teeth exclaimed, walking over to the girl and sitting next to her.

"Sorry I was staring a few seconds ago, I heard you play saxophonist and I had to see who it was. Most people in Hollywood aren't up this early, you know," he explained.

"Yeah, I'm an early bird. My name's Sandy," the girl said.

"Nice to meet you, Sandy," Dr. Teeth said, shaking the girl's hand. "Say, Sandy, have you ever thought about joining the Muppets?"

"I've always thought about it, but I don't think I can, since I play the same instrument as another Muppets. What's the saxophonist's name? Zoot?" Sandy asked.

"Yeah, that's him, but I think I can get Kermit to let another saxophonist into the Muppets," Dr. Teeth said.

Sandy, skeptical, asked, "You're not doing just because I'm a pretty girl, are you?"

"What! No, no, no! Where'd you get an idea like that?" Dr. Teeth said, trying to deny it, but Sandy giggled, seeing through his lie. "Don't worry, it's fine that you think I'm pretty," she said, smiling.

Dr. Teeth grinned as well, feeling more relaxed around the girl, and they continued to talk a little more, where they exchanged numbers and eventually planned on meeting again. Later that day, Dr. Teeth went back to the Muppet Boarding House, where the Muppets were now awake and trying to get breakfast ready.

Walter was trying to help too, but he kept getting knocked down or run over. Eventually, the Muppet ran out of the way of the action, where he noticed Dr. Teeth.

"Oh hey, Dr. Teeth. Where were you this morning? The band was looking for you," Walter said.

"I just decided to head out and get fresh air. You say the band was looking for me?" Dr. Teeth answered.

"Yeah, they're over there," Walter, pointing at part of the table where the band was sitting and talking amongst themselves.

Actually, Animal was trying to eat the table and Zoot was on the verge of falling asleep while Janice, Floyd and Lips talked.

"Hey, Walter told me you were looking for me," Dr. Teeth said, getting his bandmates' attention.

"Oh hey, Dr. Teeth! Yeah, we were just trying to figure out where you were since we couldn't find you in our room," Floyd explained.

"That, and like, we were curious about what we were going to do for the Muppet Show," Janice added.

Dr. Teeth thought to himself for a few moments before saying, "I'm not sure yet. I'll check back in with you guys later when I get an idea. Now, have you seen the Frog-in-Chief?"

"He's over there, talking to Miss Piggy," Lips stated, pointing in the direction towards the staircase.

Dr. Teeth looked over to see Kermit was indeed talking to Miss Piggy, who was probably trying to ask him to marry her again. The keyboardist walked over, where he heard the conversation.

"Oh come on, Kermie. Won't you please consider it? We looked so cute in the movie. Why can't we get married in real life?" Miss Piggy asked.

"Not now Piggy, I want to focus on my career a little more before I decided to settle down. And besides, there are so many things I don't want to risk," Kermit stated.

"Like what? Publicity? Your parents not approving of our relationship? Future in laws?" Piggy asked, making some cliché assumptions and excuses about why a man wouldn't marry someone.

Kermit bit his lip and said, "It's a little more complicated than that. I don't want to talk about it."

Miss Piggy huffed before stomping up to her room. Kermit shook his head and sighed, "If only I could tell, but I don't want to endanger your life."

"Hey, Kermit," Dr. Teeth said.

Kermit looked at the Muppet and seemed to smile. "Hi-ho, Dr. Teeth. Is there anything I can do for you?" the frog asked his friend.

"Well yeah, it's very important," Dr. Teeth said.

"Well, tell me," Kermit said.

"You see, earlier this morning, I walked in the park and I met this girl who can play saxophone very well. I was wondering if you would let her join the Muppets. She'd be groovy to have around," Dr. Teeth explained.

Kermit's expression became nervous and said, "Well, Doc, she sounds great, but we're not looking for any saxophonists, in fact, we haven't really needed one since Zoot is already here to fulfill that role."

"What about Flash, the saxophonist from Jim Henson Hour?" Dr. Teeth asked, remembering his old friend who apparently disappeared after Jim Henson Hour was canceled.

Kermit became even more nervous and he said, "Well, he quit, so he's technically part of the Muppets anymore."

"Why are you nervous?" Dr. Teeth asked his boss, confused and concerned.

Kermit shook his head, snapping himself out of it and said, "Sorry, no reason. Listen, I'm sorry, but we can't hire that girl…unless, something was to happen to Zoot like if he quit or disappeared, or passed away."

"I see, thanks for your time," Dr. Teeth said, sounding sad, and walked away.

"No problem," Kermit said. Then the frog said to himself, "Boy, I almost let what happened to Flash slip out."

25 years ago, Zia had Flash, Digit, Beard, Vicki, Waldo C Graphic, Leon, Lindbergh, Zondra, Chip, and Ubu offed, despite Kermit's protests and asking Zia if they could just stay around long enough for Jim Henson's funeral, but she refused. Kermit still regretted letting Zia get away with that, but there was nothing he could do about it.

Dr. Teeth went up to the band's bedroom, where he thought to himself for a few moments. The only reason Sandy couldn't join was because Zoot was still around. He wished there was some way for Sandy to join…until he remembered what Kermit said; "We can't hire the girl…unless something was to happen to Zoot, like if he quit or disappeared, or passed away." That gave Dr. Teeth an idea.

Later that day, Dr. Teeth went around the theater, trying to find what he needed. He looked in one of the rooms, where he found a whole bunch of empty crates.

"Wow, looks someone in the theater had been hoarding," the keyboardist assumed. He looked through the crates until he found one that could hold Zoot perfectly. He then went around the theater until he entered an old closet, where he found some Aqua Dots.

"I knew Robin had forgotten to get rid of these. Just hope they're still effective," Dr. Teeth muttered, before shoving the small bag into his pocket. He went down to the canteen where he found a full bottle of blue Mountain Dew, which was Zoot's favorite. He dropped a few of the Aqua Dots into the beverage, which dissolved instantly due to the carbonation.

Dr. Teeth grinned as he grabbed the empty crate and took it to the bus, where he hid everything in the back.

"Now we just have to wait until nightfall," he muttered before heading back into the theater before anyone missed him.

Later, that night, Dr. Teeth found Zoot alone in the canteen, with nobody, not even the Swedish Chef working away in the kitchen, around. "Perfect," Dr. Teeth thought to himself as he approached the saxophonist.

"Hey Zoot!" the keyboardist greeted his friend.

Zoot looked over to his friend and said, "Hey."

Dr. Teeth sat next to him and asked, "So, do you have anything planned tonight?"

Zoot, confused, said, "No?"

"Good, I was hoping you'd want to hang out. We don't really spend time with one another very often, well we do, but normally Floyd, Animal or Lips is also around," Dr. Teeth stated.

Zoot thought to himself and realized his bandmate was right; normally when they're around each other, someone else is always around to join in on the conversation at any second, so they never really spoke ever since they both joined the Muppets.

"Sure man, let's go," Zoot said, smiling a little.

The duo went outside where they got on the Electric Mayhem bus and headed out. Dr. Teeth thought of all the possible places where he could dump Zoot, specifically a place where nobody would see them. There were cops all over LA, especially since the crime rate went up a while ago. Then, he remembered that there was an old concrete bridge very far outside of town where nobody went anymore, except for a few homeless people that is, but the cops will think they were crazy if they saw him commit this deed.

"So, what made you want to spend time with me?" Zoot asked his friend.

"Well, we're friends aren't we? Can't we hang out?" Dr. Teeth asked.

"Good point. It just seemed like you were only interested in girls for a while since I see you talking to a lot of them lately, especially the female guest stars," Zoot told the keyboardist.

Teeth cleared his through nervously and ignored the statement. He knew the reason he was getting rid of Zoot was just so he could get Sandy to be the resident saxophonist. He parked on the bridge and motioned Zoot to follow him off the bus.

Zoot was very surprised about where they were, being in the almost abandoned part of town and all, but he was sure nobody would find them and interrupt their hang out.

"Zoot…how long have we known each other?" Dr. Teeth asked the saxophonist.

Zoot thought to himself for a few moments until he said, "Ever since we were kids."

"Yeah, good times, huh?" Dr. Teeth said.

"I still remember how we first met each other," Zoot said.

"Really? You forget rehearsals sometimes and you remember that? Tell me how we met to prove it," Dr. Teeth said as he walked on the bus and grabbed the Blue Mountain Dew bottle.

"Well, we were both in kindergarten and some kids kept picking on me about how long my hair was and calling me a girly-boy, pansy, and stuff like that."

"Sounds accurate."

"Yeah, and then, you ran up and shouted at them to leave me alone, like, I don't know, you were a hero or something. They left me alone and you introduced me to the rest of the band when we were just little kids. That was really nice of you to do that," Zoot said.

"Yep, you do remember it," Dr. Teeth said, getting off the bus and handing Zoot the soda. "Here, I got this for you," he said.

"Thanks man," Zoot said, smiling and accepting the soda. Usually, someone else like Gonzo, Floyd, or Animal got the soda before he found out there was soda, so it was rare he got any. Zoot took a small sip and he and Dr. Teeth stood by the railing on the bridge.

"You know Zoot, you're a really good friend. And I'm glad I got to meet you," Dr. Teeth said.

Zoot, confused again, took another sip of his drink and then asked, "Doc…you're not going to do something crazy like you're going to confess your love to me at any second are you? Or that you're dying?"

Dr. Teeth looked at his friend wide-eyed and exclaimed, "No! What made you think that? Did I say something weird?"

"No man, I just got that vibe from you," Zoot said, doing a small laugh.

Dr. Teeth laughed as well, then he said, "So, speaking of love, are you seeing any special gal?" He had to be sure he wasn't taking Zoot away from any girl he was seeing.

Zoot looked down and said, "To be honest, no. I haven't dated any girls ever since Janice and I broke up. Mainly because…I've felt different about girls. I noticed that I wasn't as attracted to girls as I used to be, and I felt different around you for a while, so I tried to figure out why. And I think I've figured out why."

"What is it?" Dr. Teeth asked his friend, concerned.

"Well, to be honest, Doc, I think…I might…I think I…I love y-," Zoot tried to say until he started to feel dizzy. "Whoa, something's going on with my head," he groaned, rubbing his head. He looked at the expiration date on the soda to see if it was expired, but it wasn't, which was odd. Then, Zoot could feel himself fall to the ground and black out.

"Wow, talk about a cliffhanger," Dr. Teeth said as he went back on the bus and grabbed the crate. He pulled it off the bus and set it next to Zoot, where he gently lifted up the saxophonist and carefully put him in the crate. A perfect fit. He ran back on the bus and got the lid, hammer and nails, where he nailed the crate shut.

Dr. Teeth sighed as he looked at his work and he thought to himself, "I wonder who Zoot was going to say he loved. Oh well, it'll be a mystery until the end of time." Dr. Teeth lifted the crate with all of his strength and set it on the edge of the bridge. He bent down towards the crate and said, "Sorry Zoot." Then, he pushed the wooden box containing his unconscious friend into the river, which was quickly swept away.

Dr. Teeth watched it got for a few more seconds until he got back on the bus and drove back to the theater, leaving the Mountain Dew bottle, which still had some soda in it, on the bridge, where a small hand put the cap back on and took it.

**Well, Zoot was in a sense offed by Dr. Teeth, but is he really dead? Wait till next chapter of Offed!**

**Please Follow, Favorite, and/or review!**


	3. Zoot learns the Truth

Meanwhile, the crate that contained Zoot was flowing very fast down the river. It was on quick approach of a waterfall. Zoot seemed to be done for until someone jumped into the water and grabbed the box. The hooded stranger dragged it out of the river, trying his or her best not to be taken by the current. The person eventually pulled his crate onto the riverbank.

The person then said in a female British accent, "Well, let's see what the damage is." She whipped out a crowbar and pried open the box. Within moments, she managed to get it open and looked inside to see Zoot.

"Hey, it's Zoot," she said, surprised. She reached into the box and gently shook him awake. "Seems to be out cold. I'll just have to get Ubu to bring him into the house," the woman said to herself before hollering, "Hey Ubu! Help me with this!"

Within moments, a gorilla with blue hair, tan skin, and a pink-red nose showed up. "Coming Zondra," the ape said as he ran over to the crate and looked in. "Who is that?" Ubu asked.

"It's Zoot, the second saxophonist of Solid Foam. He was also in Muppets Tonight," Zondra stated.

"Ah, I've never seen him before," Ubu stated.

"Are you just going to stand there and chatter or are you going to help me get this guy inside the cave?" Zondra asked her cohort.

"Sorry, right away," Ubu said, reached into the crate and pulled the unconscious Muppet out and carried him into the cave, followed by Zondra.

By morning, Dr. Teeth had managed to get back home without the Muppets noticing anything suspicious about his behavior. He also managed to get through breakfast without anyone suspecting anything. That day, at the theater, Dr. Teeth had tried to get through the day without anyone finding out about the awful deed he committed the night before.

Finally, after a few hours, Lips and Floyd started asking anyone if they've seen Zoot. So far, nobody's seen him ever since rehearsal yesterday.

"I'm starting to get worried. What if something really bad happened to him?" Lips said.

"Don't worry, Lips, Zoot isn't the kind of person that would forget rehearsal," Floyd told his bandmate, but Lips could tell Floyd was very worried too.

After a whole day of searching and getting some other Muppets to help too, nobody could find their saxophonist friend.

"Where did he go?" Walter wondered.

"Do you think he, like, quit?" Janice asked.

"No, no, no, Zoot would never quit the Muppets. He said he wouldn't," Floyd said.

"That's what Clifford said, and then he got up and left one day without saying goodbye," Rizzo stated.

"Yeah, that was very rude, okay," Pepe agreed.

"And don't forget Spamela Hamderson," Miss Piggy added.

"I still stand by me theory that you told her to quit, okay!" Pepe shouted at the pig.

"Pepe, I keep telling you, moi had nothing to do with Spamela leaving!" Piggy argued.

At that moment, Kermit walked into the room and asked, "Has anyone seen Zoot? Nigel is looking for him."

"We don't know, Kermit! We looked for him all day!" Fozzie exclaimed.

"What!" Kermit shouted, frightened before running up to his office and got on the phone. Kermit waited, tapping his flipper impatiently, until finally, someone answered.

"What do you want, Frog?" Zia's voice asked.

"Zia, did you off Zoot?" Kermit questioned.

"No, why? Is he missing?" Zia asked, sounding concerned but Kermit could tell she was faking it.

"Yes, and we kind of need him for our show!" Kermit exclaimed.

"Cool it, Frog. I'm being honest here. I had nothing to do with Zoot disappearing," Zia sneered. "Maybe he just left."

"No way! Zoot would never leave the Muppets! He's part of our family," Kermit argued.

"I'm just saying," Zia said, before hanging up.

Kermit sighed and hung up as well. Downstairs, everyone was still talking about Zoot's sudden disappearance until Dr. Teeth thought now was the time to get involved.

The keyboardist walked up to his friends and asked, "Hey, what's going on?"

"Dr. Teeth, Zoot's missing! We can't find him anywhere!" Walter exclaimed. "Did you see him by any chance?"

"Well, before I left the theater to head home on the bus, I saw him and he seemed angry about something. I tried to talk to him but he brushed me off and walked down the street. That was the last time I saw him," Dr. Teeth lied.

"What! He was mad about something? I wonder why?" Lips said.

"Hold on, I've known Zoot for years, and I've never, _ever_, seen him angry," Floyd said.

"Fer sure," Janice said.

"Well, it looks like something managed to bug him. Maybe he quit after all," Rowlf said.

"No, no, no. Zoot did NOT quit! He'll be back later today. I know he will," Floyd said.

"Yeah! Yeah!" Animal agreed.

"I'm sorry Floyd, but it looks like we'll have to replace Zoot for the night," Kermit said, as he rejoined his friends.

"Replace him?!" Lips and Floyd exclaimed, mortified Kermit would suggest such a thing.

"Until we can find him, that is. But if he doesn't return in a month, we're going to hire a new saxophonist. I'm sorry, but there's not much we can do," Kermit said, sounding sad. Then the frog looked at Dr. Teeth and said, "Doc, you said you meet a girl that was a saxophonist yesterday morning right?"

"Yeah, do you want me to go get her?" Dr. Teeth asked.

"Yes, the sooner, the better," Kermit said.

"Wait, Dr. Teeth, you can't seriously be agreeing with the frog about replacing Zoot?" Floyd asked his friend.

"Sorry Floyd, but he's right. We can't just sit here and wait for him to come home. We have to get a replacement, but it won't be permanent until at least a month from now," Dr. Teeth stated.

Floyd did an annoyed grunt before stomping up the stairs to the band's dressing room.

"Floyd?" Janice said, going after her boyfriend with Animal and Lips following close behind.

Meanwhile, Zoot had woken up on a bed somewhere. The saxophonist rubbed his forehead, trying to figure out what happened last night, until he remembered he was with Dr. Teeth until he suddenly started to feel dizzy and blacked out. Zoot looked at his surroundings, trying to figure out where he was, where he realized he was in a cave of some sort, judging by the rock walls.

Zoot looked down at his bed to see it was a simple bed with a mattress, bed sheets, pillow and thick blanket. He looked around the room to see there were also a small wooden table, a small empty bookshelf, a small wooden stool, and a small, old dresser. He noticed an exit. Zoot got out of the bed, and walked out of the little cave room to see it was part of a bigger cave. He also noticed that he was very high up and was wondering how to get down until he realized he was standing on part of a long ramp that was connected to other rooms and headed downstairs where there was this big fire lit in a big pit.

Zoot carefully went down the ramp, hoping not to fall or slip, since he knew that was lead to an instant death until he finally made it down. He looked around some more to see there were bigger caves on the bottom floor, one that contained several crates and boxes, possibly surplus, another had food, and a third had old furniture. There was also this big gong. He was very confused until he saw a small brown bunny came out of one of the small caves on one of the upper floors, hopped all the way downstairs and stepped up to the big gong.

He whipped a big drum-stick and hit the gong several times. Zoot covered his ears and cringed from the loud sound until he noticed some other people were exiting from the other caves. He realized they were Muppets, a few of them he recognized.

Finally, the little bunny stopped hitting the gong and he was shaking from the vibrations before he passed out.

"I'm starting to think it was a mistake to make Bean the one beat the gong," a familiar voice said.

Zoot looked up to see a Muppet with purple skin, purple-dark pink dreadlocks and was wearing black sunglasses.

"Clifford?" Zoot said, surprised.

Clifford looked around to see who said his name until he looked down and saw Zoot. "Yo, Zoot! How've you been?" he asked as he made his way down to the bottom floor.

"I've been fine, until I woke up this morning here. If you wouldn't mind, could you tell me where Dr. Teeth is?" Zoot asked his old friend.

Clifford looked away from the saxophonist and said, "You better talk to Sam about that."

Zoot nodded and looked around, until he realized that the only Sam he knew was Sam the Eagle, and as far as he could tell, he was nowhere in sight.

"Sam? Who's Sam?" he asked.

"Don't tell me you forgot about me," a voice said.

Within seconds, Zoot was approached by a Muppet that was completely bald and had peach skin and big ears and eyes. "Don't you remember me? I was the bald guy that Kermit knew in the 50s. I was on that special in 1986," the stranger stated.

Zoot thought until he figured out he was referring to _"The Muppets: A Celebration of 30 Years."_ "Oh yeah, now I remember you…sort of. Some of the others said that you went missing after that special," Zoot stated.

"Well, I'll explain what happened to me after you tell me what happened to you," Sam said.

Zoot thought for a few moments before saying, "The last thing I remember is that I was standing next to Dr. Teeth on the old concrete bridge outside of LA, drinking a Blue Mountain Dew when I suddenly felt dizzy…I think I passed out. Then, before I knew it, I woke up here."

"Hmm, well, it looks like Zia had nothing to do with this one," Sam muttered.

"Zia?" Zoot asked, upon hearing the older Muppet.

"Oh, Zia is a person that tends to off Muppets, and judging by your story, I don't think she was involved in any way," Sam explained.

"Are you sure? Because this is definitely one of her crates," another Muppet said, dragging the wooden crate that contained Zoot over to Sam. Zoot looked at the Muppet to see she had pale peach skin and short black hair that was a tad messy.

"Darci?" Zoot asked, remembering a girl that looked like that from Muppets Tonight.

"No, it's Zondra. The girl that was involved with Gorilla Television," Zondra corrected him. "Darci was an alias I had while I was on Muppets Tonight."

"Oh yeah, Zondra, from Jim Henson Hour," Zoot said.

"Yeah, I was surprised that they were the same person too. We were offed around the same time. Apparently, she was offed after Jim Henson Hour ended and I managed to survive, but she snuck back into the Muppets, changing her name and speaking in her real accent. I never knew they were the same person until she told me. I always assumed they were just related," Clifford stated. "As far as we know, she's the only Muppet who had done that."

"Wow, cool," Zoot said, impressed, until he realized that Clifford said she was offed. "Wait, what do you mean she was offed?" the saxophonist asked.

"Well, someone gave her a medicine that knocked her unconscious, shoved her in a crate, and threw her in the river, trying to kill her, but she was lucky someone was keeping watch of the river to see if more people were going to be offed, and we managed to save her, along with the other Muppets from Jim Henson Hour and Muppets Tonight. That's what happened to me in '86" Sam explained.

"Was…I offed too?" Zoot asked.

"Well, when a Muppet is offed, it means they weren't popular enough, or they were removed to make sure someone stayed famous. It's happened to a lot of the Muppets here," Sam said. "But in your case, I think your friend Dr. Teeth had a different to try to kill you."

"Wait a second, man; are you implying that my friend tried to kill me. I don't believe that," Zoot said, denying it.

"Really? Then explain why there were Aqua Dot chemicals in that soda you were drinking?" a snake-like Muppet said, using small arms to lift up the bottle.

"Aqua Dots? Didn't that get recalled because supposedly it contained chemicals that are in a date rape drug?" Zoot asked.

"Yep, the same stuff. Thanks for the analysis, Icky Gunk," Zondra confirmed.

"No problem."

Zoot was silent for a few moments, shocked, until he frowned and shook his head, saying, "I still don't believe that Doc tried to kill me. I'm going to head back to the theater and show myself, and then, I'll prove you all wrong!" Zoot then ran off for a few seconds before he came back and asked, "Um…where's the exit?"

"Up there," Sam said, pointing up at the first cave hole, which had sunlight coming through it.

"Thanks man," Zoot said, before racing up the ramp and running outside.

"Sam! You can't seriously be letting him leave?" Zondra exclaimed.

"Oh, I had to. It's the only way he'll learn the truth. I have a feeling that by the time he gets to the theater, he'll be very disappointed. Clifford, you better go after him," Sam said.

"Sure thing, man," Clifford said, before going after Zoot.

"Hey, why does Clifford always follow the new people? I want to go too. I haven't seen the Muppet Theater in a long time," Zondra said.

"Fine, you can go as well, Zondra," Sam said, motioning the punk Muppet to leave.

Zondra proceeded to run after Clifford.

In Los Angeles, Zoot was running as fast as he could, trying to get to the Muppet theater before rehearsals for this week's show started. Clifford and Zondra tried to keep up with him as quickly as they could, but it was difficult since they've never dealt with someone as fast as him. Finally, they made it to the old building, where Zoot smiled and entered through the front doors, with Clifford and Zondra followed closely. They entered the lobby to see Pops sleeping at his desk, like usual.

Zondra was about to tap on his shoulder to wake him up so they could get permission to enter, but Zoot said, "Don't worry. We can just go in." The saxophonist was about to do just that until…he saw something.

On the stage, the Electric Mayhem band was rehearsing a song and a new Muppet was playing saxophone...a girl Muppet that is! After the band stopped playing, Dr. Teeth asked, "Well, what do you guys think of her?"

"Well, she plays rully awesome, but the band still won't be the same with Zoot," Janice commented.

"Don't worry, once the audience see her and hear her play, they'll get used to her," Dr. Teeth stated.

"True, but won't they wonder what happened to Zoot?" Lips asked.

"Yeah, that could happen. We could say Zoot is on vacation until we're sure he quit, which would only take a month," Dr. Teeth suggested.

"Good idea," Lips said.

After all the Muppets, minus Dr. Teeth and Sandy, exited, Dr. Teeth went up to the female saxophonist and said, "You did really well, Sandy."

The girl smiled and said, "Thanks." Then her expression turned to sorrow and she said, "But I'm not sure if your friends like me that much. They keep saying stuff like I'm not as good as him or I'll never be like him."

"Who?" Dr. Teeth asked.

"Um…the one with the mustache and the guy with the trumpet. I have a feeling that the drummer guy doesn't like me that much either, and I heard he really likes women," Sandy stated.

"Floyd, Lips and Animal? I'll talk to them but they're probably still upset about Zoot being missing and they don't like big changes like this," Dr. Teeth said.

"And they have a good reason, you jerk," Zoot grumbled, gripping the door handle, about to barge in and put an end to things right away.

But then, Dr. Teeth said, "And about them saying you'll never be as good as Zoot? I think you're just as good as him, maybe even better than him even."

Zoot froze and his mouth dropped in shock. Did Dr. Teeth really say that? "Did…he just say that girl was better than me?" he asked Clifford and Zondra softly.

"Fraid so, man," Clifford confirmed, nodding slowly.

"Zoot, I'm very sorry," Zondra said, but the saxophonist had run back outside.

Clifford followed very closely behind. Zondra stayed behind to watch Dr. Teeth and Sandy. She opened the door into the auditorium and tried to take a closer look. "The kind of guy that throw away their friends for the sake of a girl getting a job where he works so he can woo her. My least favorite type," she muttered.

At the same time Walter had been watching Dr. Teeth and Sandy. He had heard what the keyboardist had said about Zoot, and he didn't like it one bit. "Dr. Teeth, you said that girl was better than Zoot. How could you say that about your own friend, the friend who left us," he said.

Walter sighed and was about to leave, until something caught his eye, well someone. The Muppet saw Zondra looking into the room, and he assumed she wanted to speak to Kermit, since she looked like a Muppet too. "Hey! Can I help you with anything?" Walter hollered to the girl.

Zondra looked in the direction of the new Muppet's voice and saw Walter. She gasped and ran out of the theater.

"Wait! Don't run away! Did I scare you? I didn't mean to!" Walter shouted, going after the girl.

Dr. Teeth and Sandy heard the younger Muppet holler and followed him.

"Walter, what is it? Did you see someone?" Dr. Teeth asked his friend.

"Yeah! Some Muppet girl. She had short and somewhat spiky black hair and pale peach skin. She also had dangling silver earrings and wore black and purple striped halter top, purple and black striped fingerless gloves that reached her elbows, purple eye shadow, a black skirt and black boots.

Dr. Teeth thought to himself and said, "She sounds familiar…her description is familiar to Zondra and Darci's."

"Who are Zondra and Darci?" Walter asked.

"Oh, just these two Gothic Muppet girls I knew. Zondra was on Jim Henson Hour, part of a group called Gorilla Television who tried to ruin our shows, and Darci was on Muppets Tonight, where she was on the reality show sequence, Real World Muppets. Bobo and Rizzo knew Darci very well, so you can ask them if you want to know," Dr. Teeth stated.

"I wonder if that was really one of those two girls," Walter said.

"I doubt it; nobody's seen either of them in years. I doubt some people even remember her," Dr. Teeth said.

Back at the Offed Muppet Cave, Zoot had run inside, panting, with tears in his eyes. He couldn't believe Sam was right; Dr. Teeth tried to kill, and as it turns it, it was so some girl could join! The idea of it made Zoot want to cry, actually, he was crying, but not too loudly.

Sam eventually saw him and went up the ramp to greet him. "Zoot, you look upset. What happened at the Muppet Theater?"

Clifford then ran into the cave."Dr. Teeth tried to kill him just so some girl could join the Muppets. And Dr. Teeth said that the girl was a better saxophonist than he was which is kind of harsh. What a jerk, eh Zoot," Clifford said, patting his friend on the shoulder, trying to comfort him.

"Don't. Touch. Me," Zoot grumbled before racing down the ramp and into the cave that he woke up in.

"Poor guy, and he and Doc had been friends for years," Clifford stated. "When do you think he'll recover, Sam?"

"I don't know, maybe a year or two, perhaps even 5, but I think he'll still hold a grudge.

Zondra then ran into the cave and said, "Sorry I'm late, some new Muppet saw me."

"And you wonder why Sam doesn't usually send you out!" Clifford shouted.

**Well, looks like Zoot found out the truth, and he wasn't too pleased. Will he recover in 5 years? Find out in the next chapter of Offed!**

**And just so you know, Zondra is a real character from the Jim Henson Hour if you've never heard of it. you probably haven't since it only had one season. **

**Please Follow, Favorite, and/or Review!**


	4. 5 Years Later

Walter was walking down the street, carrying a big box of props for the Muppet Show.

"Wow, these are so heavy. I wonder what kind of props Kermit has in here," the Muppet said to himself. Then, someone took the box from him. "Hey, thanks. That box was getting heav-," Walter was saying, until he saw the person was running off with the box!

"Hey! That's not yours!" Walter hollered, going after the man. The Muppet tried to keep up with the human, but there were downsides with being smaller than a human; one is that it was hard to run fast on smaller legs.

Then, out of nowhere, someone kicked the thief in the face and knocked the box out of his hands. Walter grabbed the box as the robber ran away in fear. He looked at the stranger that had helped him and said, "Thanks! I would've been in trouble if I lost these props!"

Then, Walter realized that the person that helped him was Zoot! He was no longer wearing his usual attire and was now wearing a dark blue shirt, black pants, a tan trench coat and a black fedora.

"Zoot! It's you! Where've you been in the last 5 years?" Walter asked his old friend.

Zoot, without answering, ran away from the Walter.

"Wait! Zoot! Come back!" Walter hollered at the old saxophonist and was about to go after him when his cell phone began to ring. Walter answered it and said, "Hello, Walter here. What is it?"

"Walter, where are you? We need those props pronto," Scooter told the younger Muppet.

"Sorry, Scooter, I got sidetracked. I'll explain why once I get to the theater!" Walter explained before hanging up and racing to the theater.

At the Muppet Theater, Walter barged into the auditorium, where Scooter approached him, saying "Good, you got the props. Now just hand them to me and I'll just-."

But Walter didn't hand the go-fer the box; he sort of threw it at him, which caused Scooter to nearly fall over. "Hey! What was that for?" Scooter asked his friend, surprised Walter did such a thing.

"Sorry Scooter, I'm in a rush! I have to find Kermit!" Walter exclaimed.

"He's in his office at the moment," Scooter stated as Walter was running backstage and dashed up the steps that lead to Kermit's office.

"Kermit!" Walter shouted.

The Frog-In-Chief jumped at the sound of Walter's calls and asked, "Walter! What's wrong? Did Gonzo shoot himself through the roof again?"

"No! Nothing to do with Gonzo! You're not going to believe this! I saw Zoot on the street! You see, some guy stole the box of props from me and then Zoot turned him and got them back for me. Kermit, Zoot is alive and still in LA somewhere! We got to find him and get him to rejoin the Muppets!" Walter explained.

Kermit, wide-eyed, asked, "Are you sure it was him?"

"Positive!" At that moment, Miss Piggy, Floyd, Dr. Teeth, Lips, Gonzo and Fozzie entered the room.

"What's Walter screaming about? I can hear him from my dressing room!" Miss Piggy stated.

"Miss Piggy! You're not going to believe it! I saw Zoot earlier today!" Walter exclaimed.

"What! You did?" Floyd asked, surprised.

"Yeah!"

"Did you talk to him at all?" Lips asked.

"I tried to but he ran away. I don't why," Walter admitted.

Dr. Teeth thought to himself for a few moments, thinking, "Was that Zoot Walter saw? No, it couldn't be. I threw him into the river 5 years ago. There's no way he could've survived that. This has to be a mistake." Then, the keyboardist said, "Walter, are you sure it was Zoot and not a Muppet that looked like him?"

"Dr. Teeth! I know it was him! It had to be him!" Walter insisted, not believing that he wasn't buying what he was saying.

"If it was Zoot, then why didn't he speak to you when you spoke to him?" Dr. Teeth asked.

Walter thought to himself, trying to think of a logical explanation, where he said, "Maybe he feels guilty about leaving the Muppets and that we hate him for quitting."

"That does make sense," Fozzie agreed.

"Dr. Teeth, Walter's saying that he saw one of your old friends, and you don't believe him?" Gonzo said, shocked.

"It's not that I don't believe him, I just have some doubt about it," Dr. Teeth stated, trying to not raise suspicion.

Walter thought to himself, until he said, "I'll prove it! I saw Zoot recently today so he has to still be in Los Angeles. I'll bring him back to the theater and show you it was really him, by any means necessary!"

"Walter, you're starting to talk crazy," Lips warned the younger Muppet.

"No I'm not! I'll do it! And I'll succeed!" Walter exclaimed, running out of the office.

Later, in the canteen, most of the other Muppets were either eating supper or talking amongst themselves. There was even a new Muppet named Skeeter, who was Scooter's twin sister, who looked like a female version of him, but with cat-eye glasses. She also wore a purple tank top, dark and light turquoise tights and striped fingerless gloves that reached past her elbows, a black skirt, and a purple headband. She was keeping to herself for a few minutes, watching all the action, until she noticed Lips seemed down about something.

"Hey Lips, what's wrong?" Skeeter asked, walking over to the trumpeter.

"Nothing much, it's just that…well, I had a date with a girl last night, and I didn't feel much of a spark from her," Lips explained.

"Again? Lips, that's the 11th time this has happened," Skeeter said.

Over the last 5 years, Lips had been trying to date girls, but for some reason, he doesn't feel any attraction towards. He just thinks they're cute, but he was never in love with a girl. The first girl he dated was Trumpet Girl, and they only remained friends. He tried many different types of girls: the hot and sassy, the cute and reserved, the dumb and sweet, but he never truly loved either one of them. He was confused about why this was happening.

"I know! I'm so embarrassed! I mean, Animal can chase any woman he wants, and they end up liking him too, Dr. Teeth had started dating Sandy 3 years ago and he says he's going to propose to her soon, and Floyd has Janice. I feel like I'm the only guy here that hasn't got a girlfriend that last more than a week," Lips stated, sounding close to tears.

Skeeter patted him on his back, trying to comfort him until she got an idea. "Hey Lips, have you ever considered that girls aren't your thing?" she asked.

Lips looked at the girl, wide-eyed, and said, "What do you mean?"

"I mean, like, maybe you'd be much happier with a guy than a girl," Skeeter explained.

Lips shook his head, "No, I don't think I'm like that."

"Well, at least think about for a while, and then, maybe you'll find that the one for you is a guy," Skeeter said. Then she changed the subject. "So, you said Dr. Teeth is going to propose to Sandy?" she asked.

"Yeah, they've been dating for 3 years. I'm kind of happy for him, but to be honest, and feel like a jerk for saying this…but I haven't really gotten used to Sandy being around. I don't like her one bit," Lips admitted.

"Wow, what did she do to you?" Skeeter asked.

"Nothing, that's what makes it worse! I feel like I have to be her friend, but something tells me I have to hate her," Lips stated.

"I think it's because she took your friend, Zoot's, spot," Skeeter said.

"Yeah, that's probably it. I'm sure Floyd feels the same way toward her, but Janice had sort of befriended her. She still misses Zoot being around, but she knows the chances of him coming back are slim…unless Walter is right and he did see Zoot earlier today," Lips said.

"Cross your fingers," Skeeter said, crossing her fingers for good luck. "So, when did Doc meet Sandy?"

"Hmm…well, it was the morning on the day Zoot left," Lips said.

"Ah…wait. Are you saying Dr. Teeth met Sandy sometime in the morning and then sometime during the night of that day, Dr. Teeth said Zoot supposedly left?" Skeeter asked, skeptical.

"Yeah, that's it…Skeeter, what are you implying?" Lips asked the girl, suspicious.

"Sorry, it just seems odd that on the same day Dr. Teeth met Sandy, Zoot left. There's something funny about his story about Zoot being mad about something and leaving without warning. I mean, if he was leaving, why didn't he clean out his part of the band's dressing room? I can't put my finger on it, but something seems very wrong," Skeeter said.

"I'd be quiet, Skeeter, or someone might hear you. This sounds like something you shouldn't say aloud," Lips warned the girl.

"Fine, I'll think about it later," Skeeter said, walking out of the canteen.

Lips thought about what Skeeter said. "She's not wrong. Something seemed off about Dr. Teeth's story about him seeing Zoot leaving in an angry mood. And Zoot never got that angry in his entire life! Maybe…Dr. Teeth fired Zoot just so Sandy could join, but if I ask him about it; he'll deny the whole thing. I'm sure Dr. Teeth left something out in his story, but I wish I knew what it was."

Later that day, Walter was going around LA, looking for Zoot. The Muppet searched every alley and the park, trying to find his old friend. Walter was about to give up until he heard some noise in the alley. Walter slowly walked down the alley to see what it was, where he heard voices.

"Careful, Clifford. We might get caught!" a voice warned.

"Sorry, man, but it's harder to pick a lock than it looks!" another voice snapped quietly, who Walter assumed was Clifford.

"Can we both be quiet? Someone might hear you two shouting," a familiar voice snarled.

Walter gasped and ran into the alley to see Zoot, Clifford and Sam. "Zoot! It is you! Thanks for getting me the box of props back from that thief earlier!" Walter exclaimed.

"Shh!" Zoot, Clifford and Sam hushed the boy.

"Sorry," Walter said, now whispering. "Say, what are you doing here?"

"I live with these guys now. They're my new friends now," Zoot explained.

"New friends?" Walter said, looking at the two other Muppets. He looked at Clifford and said, "Say, you're Clifford from Muppets from Space."

"I knew someone was bound to recognize me," Clifford said, smiling.

"Well, he is technically the Muppets #1 fan," Zoot said, smirking.

Walter than looked at Sam and said, "Sorry, but I don't think I've seen you before. Who are you?"

"It's okay. I didn't expect you to anyway," Sam said. "I'm Sam, from _Sam & Friends_. I'm an old friend of Kermit's."

Walter gasped and said, "You're one of Kermit's friends!? Wow, amazing."

"Thanks," Sam said, beaming.

"So…if you don't mind me asking, what are you doing?" Walter asked. Then, the Muppet realized they were right behind a grocery store. Then, he instantly put the pieces together. "Wait a sec…were you going to rob this store?" he asked.

"We have to, Walter! It's the only way we'll get food," Clifford explained.

Walter, shaking his head, said, "No, Kermit has said once that stealing is wrong and illegal! You can't do this! You don't have to do this!"

"What else could we do to survive?" Sam asked the boy.

Walter thought to himself for a few moments before he looked thoughtful and said, "You could come back with me to the Muppet Theater and reclaim your positions in the Muppets."

"No, no, no! You expect me to go back there after what happened to me! After you all replaced me! They probably worship that new girl saxophonist by now," Zoot sneered.

"Zoot! We thought you quit! You did quit, didn't you?" Walter asked confused about why his old friend was so upset.

"No! I didn't quit! Dr. Teeth tried to kill me!" Zoot stated.

Walter froze up and said flatly, "Dr. Teeth tried to kill you?"

"Yeah, that's right. He drugged me, shoved me in a wooden crate and threw me in the river. And when I became conscious and found out I was in a cave with these guys, I learned what happened, but I couldn't believe. I went back to the theater, expecting a warm welcome, but what did I see? DR. TEETH ALL OVER THIS NEW GIRL SAXOPHONIST THAT WAS CALLED IN TO REPLACE ME!" the Muppet snapped. Zoot then took deep breaths, worn out from all the shouting he did.

Walter was shocked until he shook his head again and said, "No, Dr. Teeth would never kill you. You're his friend!"

"Oh yeah? Does it seem like he misses me at all?" Zoot asked.

Walter thought for a few moments, and realized Zoot was right; Dr. Teeth didn't seem to mind in the least that Zoot was gone! In fact, he even insulted him 5 years ago. "Oh no, that is very true. But that doesn't explain why Clifford and Sam are here with you," Walter said.

"We've been offed, Walter. In the same manner Zoot was, but by the hand of a woman who is controlling Kermit. She's threatening to kill all the Muppets if he didn't do what she said, so he's letting her off any Muppet she wanted and he couldn't do anything about," Sam said.

"What! That can't true! Kermit probably really cared about you guys! He would never let you get killed," Walter protested.

"Walter, we know this is hard to process, but it's the truth. And besides, I don't think anyone cared that we left. They probably forgot all about us," Clifford stated.

Walter shook his head, still not believing anything he was just told. "You're all lying! I know Kermit is a good guy and would never do that!" he shouted, and with that, the Muppet ran off back to the Muppet Theater. He kept muttering to himself, "It's not true! None of it is true! Kermit would never do that to his friends! And Dr. Teeth is too cool a guy to try to kill Zoot! There has to be a misunderstanding!"

The three former Muppets watched the boy run away. "How long do you think it'll take until he learns the truth?" Clifford asked Sam.

Sam shrugged and said, "I don't know…but I have a feeling it'll be soon."

**Is Sam right? Will Walter find out the truth soon? And how? Find out in the next chapter of Offed!**

**Please Follow, Favorite, and/or Review!**


	5. Walter Takes Action!

A few days later, Walter was still thinking about what Zoot, Sam and Clifford had told him a few nights ago. Did nobody really care about them anymore? Did nobody really remember them? Did Dr. Teeth really try to kill Zoot 5 years ago? Had Kermit been forced to get rid of some of his friends?

Walter needed more answers and evidence to prove if the three Muppets were right. Sometime that night, Walter was alone in the theater, save for Kermit who was in his office. Walter decided to find out fact from fiction from the frog and was actually about to knock on his boss's office door until someone barged into the theater. Not knowing who it was; Walter hid behind some crates, to hide and see what was going on. Within seconds, a tall woman with bobbed black hair with white streaks in it entered the building, accompanied by Angel Marie.

"What's Angel Marie doing with her?" Walter wondered to himself.

The woman shouted, "Frog! Where are you?"

Kermit exited from his office and went downstairs. "Zia, you really shouldn't shout. Someone could've been here and we would have never known. Now, what is it?" he asked.

"I'm here to off another one of your Muppets," Zia said, smiling smugly.

Kermit seemed to gulp nervous nervously and asked, "Who?"

"Oh, nobody too special, perhaps…your darling nephew," Zia said.

"Robin! You can't kill Robin! He's only 9! Actually, he's going to be 10 tomorrow, but he's too young!" Kermit protested.

"Kermit, it's either you give up your nephew or I kill all the Muppets in the world," Zia threatened.

Walter jumped at the sound of that. Kermit looked more nervous and thought to himself for a few moments.

"Well, Frog?" Zia asked him, getting impatient.

Kermit finally said, "Okay, you can take Robin, but please; let him have his birthday first. It's his double-digit birthday. He has to have it."

Zia narrowed her eyes at the amphibian host, until she finally said, "Fine. He can have his party, but at midnight, we're coming to get him."

"Thank you, Zia!" Kermit said, sounding happy, but Walter could sense a little sadness from his words. Since Robin was actually part of his family, his death would affect him really badly.

"Oh no, Sam was right after all. Kermit has been forced to off his friends," he muttered to himself.

Zia and Angel Marie then left, leaving Kermit alone, where the Frog started to bang his head on a wall. "Of everyone they could've offed, why did it have to be Robin? He's never done anything wrong!"

The next morning, practically every Muppet in the Muppet Boarding House wished Robin a happy birthday, which made the little frog very happy. He got a lot of presents from all the other Muppets, a lot of really cool ones in fact, mostly something to do with baseball and other fun games.

Kermit had tried his best to keep a big smile, but it was hard to do since Robin would be offed by midnight, and he wanted to cry from just the thought of it.

Walter, also knowing of Robin's terrible destiny, tried to keep a straight face as well, but it was also difficult. He still couldn't believe that it was going to happen so soon. He hoped the lady would have a change of heart and leave Robin's life alone, but he had a feeling that would be very unlikely.

Finally, at 10:00, everyone turned in for the night, except for Kermit, who sat downstairs, waiting for Zia to show up and take Robin away. Walter stayed up in his room as well, waiting for the woman to arrive. There had to be something he could do in order to stop this and help Robin, but he didn't know what. Finally, at midnight, just on time, there was a light knock on the door. Kermit quietly answered it to see Zia and Angel Marie standing on the porch, with Angel Marie holding a small crate that would hold Robin perfectly.

"We're here for Robin," the woman said.

"I know, I know. Just let me go get him," Kermit sighed, before he went upstairs, entered Robin's room and retrieved his still sleeping nephew. He carefully took him downstairs, where Angel Marie held the crate open and Kermit gently put the little frog inside.

"I'm sorry, Robin. I'm being forced to do this. I hope you forgive me and I hope you had a great time in the Muppets," Kermit said softly in Robin's ear.

Angel Marie closed the lid of the crate and made sure it was secure and nailed it shut as quietly as he could, but it wasn't easy. Every bang of the hammer made Walter jump, since he knew what was going on, and he was half-surprised that none of the Muppets woke up to the noise, then again, a lot of them were heavy sleepers.

"Good, now, shall we go to the river?" Zia asked Kermit.

Kermit stared at the small crate a few moments before looking the woman in the eye and saying, "Not this time, Zia, I don't think I'll be able to stand to see this."

"Okay, if that's what you want," Zia said, as she and Angel Marie walked out of the house and shut the door behind them.

After they left, Kermit sat by himself on the sofa, quiet, until he started to sob.

Walter was very surprised to see Kermit cry, since he's never seen him do it. It was at this point where Walter knew he had to stop Zia and Angel Marie. Walter immediately threw on some clothes and carefully exited his room, and tried to stealthily go through the living room without Kermit notice, before he quickly got out the door. He saw a black hearse which Zia and Angel Marie were in starting to leave, where he grabbed his bike and began to follow it.

In the car, Zia asked, "Angel Marie, could you drop me off at the office? There are some things I need to take care of."

"Sure thing, Zia," AM said, making a turn into part of town. Walter tried to keep a good distance away so that he wouldn't be spotted. At one point, the car parked near a building, where Walter quickly entered an alley to hide.

Zia got out of the car and asked Angel Marie, "You can handle this on your own right?"

"Of course! Nothing's gone wrong whenever you were there. How can it go wrong without you? All I have to do is throw the crate into the river. It's simple," AM stated.

"True, but make sure nobody's watching," Zia said.

"Hey, it's not like anyone goes to the bridge anymore, except a few hobos, but the cops won't listen to them," Angel Marie said, before revving the engine and driving off as Zia entered the building.

Walter took off after the Muppet, trying his best to keep up with him. Sometime later, the two Muppets arrived at the concrete bridge. Walter went a little far away from the bridge where he hid his bike.

"Hey buddy, are you throwing out that bike?" a voice asked.

Walter looked over to see a tall human man with a beard. "Sorry Hobo Joe, I'm planning on getting this bike back after I do what I have to do," Walter told the homeless man.

"Suit yourself," Hobo Joe said, walking away.

Walter quietly went on the bridge, where he saw Angel Marie grab the crate that contained Robin and set it on the edge of the bridge. Walter immediately stood on the railing of the bridge, ready to do what he had to. Angel Marie looked at the box for a few moments and looked down at the river, as if making sure the crate was in the right place to fall into the river. Finally, the Muppet knocked the crate into the water, making Walter gasp loudly.

Angel Marie, upon hearing Walter gasp, looked in the direction where the boy was standing on the railing on the bridge, where he became mortified to see the Muppet. "Walter! What are you doing here?" AM asked, shocked that he had witnessed everything.

"Doing what's right," Walter said, looking down at the river.

Angel Marie started to slowly approach him. "Easy there, kid. You do know what you're doing right now is suicide, right?" he said.

"I don't care. The river doesn't scare me. Besides, I'm a good swimmer," Walter said, before into the position that meant he was about to dive into the water.

"Wait! Stop! You'll die if you do that! Hold it!" Angel Marie shouted, running over to the boy just when Walter took a flying leap into the water.

"I'M COMIGN ROBIN!" he shouted at the top of his lungs. He fell into the water, where he started to swim with all his might toward Robin's crate. "Robin! Robin, wake up!" he screamed as he got closer.

Finally, after fighting the current so much, he managed to grab onto the crate. "I got you, Robin!" he exclaimed. Walter started to try swimming out of the river, but it didn't take long for the current to start pulling him downstream. It also didn't take long for Walter to notice that he was heading straight for a waterfall! "Help! Help me!" he shouted at the top of his lungs, hoping someone would hear him.

After a while, Walter grew tired to swimming and could feel himself start to sink into the river. "Help! I'm drowning!" he screamed, still hoping someone would save him, but as soon as the water engulfed his head, he thought all hope was loss.

Then, he felt someone grab his hair and pull him out of the water onto land. Walter sat up, coughing up any water that went in his mouth. "Thanks," he panted, looking up at his savior, to see it was Zoot! He noticed Clifford was standing nearby, where he had a crowbar and was prying open the crate that contained Robin.

Zoot suddenly grabbed Walter by the hair, looked him straight in the eye and asked, "Do you believe us now?"

Walter was silent for a few moments, before he started to nod. "Yeah, I believe you guys now."

"We better get you in the cave," Clifford said, noticing the Muppet was shivering from the cold water.

Walter walked into the cave while Clifford carried Robin in his arms and with Zoot following far behind.

Angel Marie, who was still on the bridge, had seen everything, and was shocked to see Clifford alive and well. He immediately got into the hearse, pushed the gas pedal as hard as he could and drove very fast back into the city. In the process, he called Zia.

When she picked up, she asked, "What is it, Angel Marie?"

"Zia! That kid Walter was following us! He jumped into the river and tried to save Robin!" AM exclaimed.

"What! Please tell me he drowned!" Zia snapped.

"Sorry, he didn't. Zoot saved him. And get this; Clifford is still alive!" Angel Marie stated.

"What! We offed him back in 2005! How could he still be alive?!" Zia demanded to know.

"I don't know, but I have a feeling that since Clifford is alive, I think the other offed Muppets are alive as well. What should we do?" AM added.

"Do you know where they're hiding?" Zia asked.

"No," Angel Marie answered.

"Then, until we find out, we can't do anything…wait, did you say Zoot was at the river?" Zia asked.

"Yeah, but as far as I know, we never offed him. Kermit said a few years back that he was missing," Angel Marie stated.

Zia, in her office, then remembered that when she and Angel Marie went to get the crate for Robin, she noticed that another crate seemed to be missing…and it was the one that was in Zoot's size!

"It seems that someone tried to off him, but who?" Zia theorized.

"I don't know, Zia. But it was probably a Muppet since we keep all the crates in the theater," Angel Marie said.

"I'll have to look into that and try to find the Muppet that did it…and recruit him for our group." Zia said in a sinister voice, doing an evil grin.

**Well, Walter managed to save Robin, and now he knows the truth about the Muppets, and Zia seems to have figured out that a Muppet tried to kill Zoot 5 years ago. Will she find out it was Dr. Teeth? Will she really try to recruit him for her offing group? Find out in Chapter 5!**

**Please Follow, Favorite, and/or Review!**


	6. Meeting the Offed Muppets

Inside the cave, Walter saw all the smaller caves inside and the long ramp that lead down to the bottom floor, where he could barely see Sam instructing other Muppets.

"Wow, this looks amazing," he said.

"Yeah, it is when you first see it, but just so you know, the only electricity we live off of are stolen batteries, so don't expect someone here to own a computer or cell phone. Plus, we have no internet," Clifford stated.

"Okay, I kind of figured that," Walter said, looking around seeing all the torches, lanterns and some people with flashlights. "But you should find some way to put an elevator in here. This ramp looks pretty slick. What if it rains?"

"Don't worry, the water mostly goes into the river, and it hardly floods. We only get a few inches on the bottom floor, so it's not much of a problem, except for wet shoes and feet," Clifford explained.

They made their way down the ramp, where Walter saw several Muppets he had never seen before. He saw a snake-like one and one that looked like a dark purple triangle with eyes and an orange nose trying to fix an old lamp, where the triangle one ended up getting electrocuted and fell to the ground. "Why is it always me!" he shouted.

"Because you don't drink Wilkins Coffee, Wontkins," a white Muppet said, holding a tin of old coffee.

Walter, never having heard of Wilkins Coffee before, decided to step in and say, "Excuse me, but I don't think they make that brand of coffee anymore."

The white Muppet turned quickly around and stared at Walter, making him jump. "Are you saying you don't like Wilkins Coffee?" he asked, almost sounding insane. He whipped out a cannon from nowhere and aimed it at the Muppet.

"No! I'm saying they don't make it anymore! I think the company went bankrupt or something 30 years ago!" Walter exclaimed, trying to get through to the old Muppet.

"Those of you who hate Wilkins will face the wrath or Wilkins!" the white Muppet shouted.

"Walter, let me tell you something; we tried telling this guy that for years now, and he won't believe us! He just assumes you hate it," Zoot warned the boy.

"Now you tell me!" Walter shouted.

"Stand back!" the snake-like one warned everyone, whipping out a collar of some sort and slapping it on Wilkin's neck right before the Muppet had the chance to light the cannon fuse. He clicked a button on the collar and within seconds, the crazy Muppet calmed down.

"It's sort of a sedative collar. It's the only way get this guy to calm down. Are you okay?" the snake asked the Muppet.

"Yeah thanks, Mr. umm…" Walter said, stopping, realizing he didn't know the Muppet.

"Icky Gunk. Friends call me Icky for short. The triangle is Wontkins and the psycho is Wilkins," the snake stated. "I'm surprised Wilkins was the one that went crazy and not you, Wontkins. I mean, you were the one that took all the beatings and hits."

"Yeah, well, I knew it was all an act, so it didn't bug me as much. The only reason why Wilkins here lost his mind was because he drank the expired Wilkin Coffee for years! I feel kind of bad for him," Wontkins explained.

"Maybe one day we'll figure out how to fix him," Walter said.

"I hope so, to tell you the truth, I kind of miss the old Wilkins. He was just obnoxious back then, but now he's insane! I wonder what Jim would think of him now…" Wontkins said.

Walter, Clifford, and Zoot carried on down the ramp, where they passed another cave, where Walter saw a semi-robotic Muppet and a Muppet with a tall head, big eyes and large mustache working on a big machine.

"Wait a sec, I thought you said you didn't have electricity?" he asked.

"We don't!" the android stated. "But that will change once Professor Madcliffe and I figure out how to make everything powered by solar and lunar energy! Heck, we might even make some things out of nanos and add an elevator!"

"You're planning on adding an elevator! Cool! Looks like someone is making the idea I had as soon as I got here. Mostly the elevator thing," Walter said, sounding really happy, until Zoot grabbed his shoulder and whispered, "Walter, word of advice; don't expect everything Digit and Professor M plan so soon. They're just like Bunsen and Beaker; nothing ever works 75% of the time! But unlike Bunsen and Beaker, not only one of them gets hurt but both of them do!"

At that moment, something exploded on the machine, which forced the android and the old Muppet into a wall.

"Well darn, we lost it," Digit said, slapping his knee.

"Lost it? I don't think you guys even had it!" Clifford said as he led the small group away from the cave as Digit and Professor Madcliffe started to clean up.

After passing a few caves that happened to be empty, they came across a cave where a girl Muppet with big cheeks, curly orange hair, small, beady, black eyes and big round glasses looking through a newspaper and a buxom female pig with short blonde hair with bangs reading a magazine.

"Oh no, it says here, Selena Gomez got back together with that bad boy Justin Bieber!" the girl pig gasped.

"Hopefully, they won't stay together long and this'll be the last time they ever date. She needs much nicer people," the redhead commented as she read an article involving entertainment.

"Hey girls," Clifford greeted the girl Muppets.

The girl pig looked up at the purple Muppet and gasped before dropping her magazine and running up to the man and giving him a big hug. "Clifford! You're back!" she squealed.

"I was gone for only 10 minutes," Clifford commented. "And careful, I'm carrying a newbie here."

Spamela stepped away from him and saw Robin asleep in his arms.

The ginger looked at the little frog and asked, "Is that who I think it is?"

"Yep Vicki, this is Robin the Frog, Kermit's nephew," Clifford stated.

"Kermit let that wretch Zia off him! How could he?" Vicki asked.

Walter then stepped in and said, "It's not like that! Kermit threatened his life! And besides, after Zia took Robin away in the crate, Kermit actually started crying!"

"Really, oh poor Kermit," Spamela said, sounding sad. Then she realized that Walter was new as well and asked, "I'm Spamela Hamderson. Who are you?"

"I'm Walter," Walter greeted the girl with a smile.

"Aw, you're a cute one," Spamela said, messing with his hair.

Walter couldn't help but let out a little laugh. "Say, you were on Muppets Tonight, right? In the _Bay of Pigswatch_ sketch?" he said, figuring out who she was.

"Yes, that was me. I can't believe you recognized me. Most people don't," Spamela said.

"Well, I was a fan of the Muppets ever since I was a kid," Walter stated. "I've even checked out Muppets Tonight once I found out about it on YouTube."

"Oh, did you watch Jim Henson Hour?" Vicki asked.

Walter shook his head and said, "Sorry, I haven't."

"Oh, then I guess I should introduce myself. I'm Vicki," Vicki said. "It's nice to meet you Walter."

"It's nice to meet you girls too. So Clifford, Zoot, is there anyone else I should meet?" Walter asked his friends.

"Man, Walter, we've barely scratched the surface, but let's find Robin a place for him to sleep.

Vicki went over to her bed and took a shoe box out from underneath it. She grabbed a towel and folded it to fit in the box and grabbed a small pillow and blanket. "Will this work?" she asked.

"Yeah, that's perfect," Clifford said, as he carefully placed Robin in the makeshift.

As the trio left, Walter ran back to Robin and whispered, "I'll see you later, Robin" before going back to Zoot and Clifford.

On the way down, Walter met the band in the Jim Henson Hour called Solid Foam, which had the members Flash on saxophone, Beard on electric guitar, and a girl named Francine on drums. Clifford and Digit were also in the band, but they preferred to do their own thing.

Walter also met Harry the Hipster, who Zoot said had inspired the Electric Mayhem to join the Muppets, and Yorick, who tried to eat Walter's shirt, but Clifford stopped him.

At one point, Walter thought he had found a mirror, until Clifford said it wasn't a mirror, where Walter discovered it was another him, which made him freak out until the clone morphed into Waldo C Graphic, who apologized for the joke, but Walter thought it was a little funny.

Walter also met a pink-violet lizard-like Muppet named Leon, who Clifford said normally tried to get Kermit to put some crazy stuff on MuppeTelevison, similarly to how Gonzo did it.

He then met a kiwi named Lindbergh, who worked with the electric lamps and was fixing a whole bunch of them.

Then, he met Seymour the Elephant, who was a close friend of Pepe's and usually worked as the elevator operator on Muppets Tonight.

Walter then met many other Muppets that he didn't have much interaction with since each one seemed to be working on something: Omar, Moldy Hay, Henrietta, Frank and Hank, Mushmellon, La Choy Dragon, Splurge, Bean Bunny, Chip, Ubu, and too many others to name!

"Wow, this is incredible. I never knew how many other Muppets there were," he exclaimed once they came to the bottom of the cave.

"Yeah, it's pretty hard to keep track of them all," Zoot said, smirking.

"Now, these three big caves on the bottom, what are they for? They're all packed with stuff," Walter asked.

"One cave has medical supplies, blankets and a few other necessities, a second cave had food and water, which you probably know by now we have to steal, and the last one has furniture we use to for the rooms for the newcomers, like you," Clifford explained.

"Wow! I'm going to get my own cave! Cool!" Walter gasped, very excited.

"Now, here's someone you've seen before," Clifford said, leading Walter to where Sam was.

"Walter, looks like you've come to join us," Sam said, smiling.

"Well, I kind of had to. I saved Robin from being offed some time ago, and I was spotted my Angel Marie, and he'll probably tell Zia about this and I might be in trouble so I'll need a place to hide," Walter explained.

"Angel Marie is working with her? But he's a Muppet, like us!" Zoot said.

"Looks like Zia had recruited him for her offing group. She probably promised that he'd let him live if he did what she said," Sam theorized. "I wonder how he joined."

"Maybe Zia needed more help with the crates. I'm surprised he didn't quit since a lot of the Muppets he helped off are friends of his," Clifford said.

"He probably wanted to quit, but I don't think that's an option for him right now," Walter assumed.

Then, a voice from up above hollered, "Hey Sam! I found this bike that looks small enough for a Muppet to ride."

Walter looked up to see Zondra looking down into the cave, holding his bike. He then remembered the girl that was looking into the theater 5 years ago and he realized it was the same girl. "Hey, I remember you! You're that girl I saw by the door of the Muppet Theater! What were you doing there? And also, are you Zondra or Darci?" Walter asked.

Zondra's eyes widened when she saw Walter, remembering that he was the one that spotted her in the theater years ago. "I see you got offed. You must've asked too many questions and got on everyone's nerves," Zondra sneered.

"Zondra, be nice," Zoot told the girl.

"Sorry, I do ask a lot of questions every now and then," Walter said.

"It's alright. And to answer those questions, I was in the theater because 5 years back, after Dr. Teeth tried to kill Zoot, Zoot didn't believe us so he ran back to the theater, but only to see he was already replaced, so he ran back to the cave upset, and I stayed behind to watch what was going on inside more until you spotted me. For the second question, I'm in a sense both. Darci was a fake name I used when I was on Muppets Tonight so I could have another shot of fame. I was offed at the same time as Clifford," Zondra explained as she came down the ramp with Walter's bike.

"Wow, I guess Kermit didn't realize you were the same person. He must've assumed you were her twin sister or something," Walter said.

"Yeah, that's what happened, I guess. I know Clifford didn't recognize, so it makes sense," Zondra said.

Walter looked at the purple Muppet and asked, "You didn't recognize her?"

"Like the girl said, a lot of us thought Zondra and Darci were related in some way," Clifford said.

"Wow, oh, and by the way, Zondra, I wasn't offed. I saved someone that was being offed," Walter explained.

"Oh, who?" Zondra asked. Before Walter could answer, there was a loud scream. "That would be him," Walter said flatly.

"Who are you? Where am I? Where's my Uncle Kermit? Uncle Kermit!" Robin screamed as he ran out of the cave and ran down the ramp, trying to find his way out. The little frog, panicked by all the new Muppets, didn't know what to do. He was scared until he spotted Walter, ran up to him, and hugged him.

"Walter! Am I glad to see you! Where are we?" Robin asked, still scared.

"It's kind of hard to explain," Walter said as Zoot walked up to them. "Don't be scared Robin, everyone here is a good person. They won't hurt you," he said.

Robin looked up at the blue Muppet and gasped. "Zoot? Is that really you?" he asked.

"Yeah, it's me," Zoot said, smiling.

Robin then hugged the saxophonist and said, "Wow! You really are here. Looks like Walter was telling the truth after all. The band will be so happy to see you again!"

"Maybe Floyd, Janice, Lips and Animal will, but I doubt Dr. Teeth will miss me. He's the reason why I'm here!" Zoot stated.

"What happened? And again, where are we?" Robin asked again.

"Well, Robin, you're in an old cave that was eroded after a while to look the way it does now," Sam explained as the other offed Muppets started to go down to the basement. This was the first time in a while that someone as young as Robin had been offed and they were worried how the little frog would take the news about his own uncle offing him.

"And as for what happened to me, Dr. Teeth knocked me unconscious with some sort of drug, shoved me into a crate, and threw me into the river! And he did it just so that girl sax player could join the Muppets!" Zoot snapped.

Robin jumped at the tinge of anger in Zoot's voice and became frightened. Once he realized he was starting to scare Robin, he calmed down a little and said, "Sorry. I didn't mean to yell."

"Wait, is that what happened to me?" Robin asked, putting the pieces together.

"Yeah, only it was a woman by the name of Zia. She made Kermit give you to her and tried to kill you the same way Dr. Teeth tried to kill Zoot," Clifford explained.

"What! I-I-I don't understand! Why would Uncle Kermit try to kill me? Doesn't he care about me!" Robin cried. "And most of you went through the same thing I did, so does he not care about any of us!"

"I don't think that's it, Robin. Kermit does care about you. He cares about all of us, but I heard him and Zia talk once; she said if he didn't off you, she would every single Muppet in the world!" Walter stated. All the other Muppets gasped in shock. "And besides, Kermit cried when Zia took you away in the crate. He must've cried for all of you, thinking you're all dead," Walter added.

"Then let's show him we're not dead. Let's head down to the Muppet Theater and show him we're still alive!" Robin suggested.

Sam then stepped up and said, "It won't be that easy Robin, you see, Zia wants us all dead, and she'll lose her mind if she sees us still around. She might either try to kill us again, but a different way, or kill every Muppet in the world like she threatened."

"Yeah, and Robin, we didn't blame Kermit for offing us. It's Zia's fault. She forced him to do it for years," Clifford added.

"Oh, well I'm glad none of you are mad at my uncle," Robin said, smiling.

"But nobody was forcing Dr. Teeth to kill me! He did that in his own free will!" Zoot snapped.

"Zoot, I don't think Doc was thinking straight when he tried to kill you. He probably regrets it now," Walter said. "You'll just have to forgive him for now."

"I'll forgive that jerk once he apologizes!" Zoot sneered.

**Well, looks like Walter and Robin had joined the Offed Muppets. **

**What's going on back at the Muppet Theater?**

**Will Zia move forward with the plan she had in the last chapter? **

**Does Dr. Teeth regret killing Zoot? Find out next chapter of Offed!**

**Please Follow, Favorite, and/or Review!**


	7. Dr Teeth's Rage

Back at the Muppet Boarding, the sun was starting to rise and Kermit was lying on the sofa, where he slept for the night. Then, the phone rang and the frog slowly got up and went to answer.

"Muppet Boarding House. Kermit the Frog speaking," he said, sounding tired, but he was actually still depressed about Robin being offed.

"I need an explanation, Frog!" he heard Zia snapped.

"An explanation? For what?" Kermit asked.

"Did you tell Walter about Robin being offed so he could save your nephew?" Zia questioned.

"Walter knew about Robin being offed, how?" Kermit asked, surprised.

"I don't know, I assumed you told him!" Zia shouted.

"I didn't tell him, Zia, I swear I didn't. Maybe he was still awake last night and he overheard everything from his room," Kermit theorized. "Well, what happened at the river?"

"Well, Walter followed Angel Marie to the river, where he jumped into the river and tried to save Robin. Then, Zoot came and saved Walter from drowning and helped him get Robin's crate. And also, Clifford is still alive!" Zia explained.

"Clifford is alive?!" Kermit gasped.

"Yeah, and I can only assume that the other Muppets we offed are still alive as well," Zia stated. "But when Angel Marie mentioned Zoot, I remembered that I had a crate in storage for him, but it went missing. I can only assume someone tried to off him. Did you do that?"

"No! I would never do that!" Kermit denied.

"Well someone in your theater must've. I plan on coming there as a cop and see if I can find out who it was," Zia said.

"And then what are you going to do?" Kermit asked.

"I'm going to recruit him or her for my cause," Zia said, smugly. "I'm going to bring my lie detector. It'll be easier." And with that, the woman hung up.

Kermit hung up and thought, "Who would want to off Zoot? Did he do something wrong? Looks like I might find out today."

Later that day, at the Muppet Theater, everyone was going around doing their own thing. Kermit was surprised that nobody asked were Robin or Walter were, but he assumed it was because everyone was too busy.

Somewhere else in the theater, Dr. Teeth was looking into a small black box, which contained a very nice diamond ring. Today was the day he would propose to Sandy, which he was very excited about. He was hoping she'll say yes, but he knows she will. She was crazy about him, but he was also worried about what his friends would say. He had a feeling Floyd, Animal and Lips still had something against her for replacing Zoot, but he knows they'll come around…then again, it has been 5 years.

Dr. Teeth went into the auditorium, trying to find Sandy, when he noticed a small group of people were entering through the theater's front doors. "Hey, can I help you with something? Theater isn't exactly open to put on a show until later this week," Dr. Teeth said, walking up to the people, until he saw that the leader, a woman with white streaks in her black hair, was holding up a police badge.

"Hello, I'm Zia of the LAPD; that stands for Los Angeles Police Department. Where is Kermit the frog?" she asked.

"Kermit! The police are here," Dr. Teeth hollered, going to find the frog, but before he had a chance to go backstage, Kermit ran out onstage and looked at Zia and her cohorts. He already knew what was going to happen.

After Kermit had gathered all the Muppets in the theater in the auditorium, he stood on the stage, next to Zia.

"What's wrong, Kermit? Why is a cop from the LAPD here?" Rowlf asked, concerned.

"Just here to get some answers to some questions I have for you," Zia said.

"If this has something to do with Crazy Harry, we'll pay for the damages," Scooter said.

"This has nothing to do with Crazy Harry, well, probably not him, but it involves only one of you Muppets," Zia stated.

"Only one of us? What happened?" Skeeter asked.

"There's been a murder that had occurred possibly 5 years ago; at least that's what the scientists can figure out," Zia explained.

"A murder? What does a murder have to do with us?" Fozzie asked, confused.

"The victim was an old friend of yours named Zoot," Zia stated.

At the sound of that, the room went to a deafening silence. Everyone sat in the chairs, shocked expression on their faces and their mouths wide open in horror. Finally, after a full minute of not a single sound, Janice burst out crying. Floyd held his girlfriend close to him, trying to calm her down.

Dr. Teeth noticed Lips was looking down at the floor, tears dripping from his eyes. Animal had started to moan in sorrow.

"So, what happened to him?" Gonzo asked, not sure if he wanted to know.

"We found his body in a wooden crate that was sunk to the bottom of a river just outside of town. When scientists did the autopsy, they found out Zoot had been drugged with GHB through a beverage of some sort," Zia stated.

Bunsen then stood up and stated, "GHB! That's gamma-hydroxybutyric acid! It's used as a recreational drug."

"Exactly, which is why we assume someone knocked him out, shoved him in a crate, and thrown in the river to die. He must've drowned if any of the water got in, or he woke up and suffocated from lack of oxygen," Zia theorized. "Now, like I said before, I have quite a few questions for you. For starters, who was the last person to see Zoot before he was murdered?"

It didn't take long until Dr. Teeth felt all eyes on him. He felt like freaking out, but if he did, that would raise suspicion. A **lot** of suspicion! He immediately stood up and said, "Now hold it! Zoot was my friend! I would never hurt him, let alone kill him! It could've been some sort of psycho Muppet hater or something."

Zia looked into his eyes, where she saw he wasn't telling the whole truth, which made her smirk. "We'll see about that."

Throughout the day, Dr. Teeth seemed calm on the outside, but inside, he was a nervous wreck! What would happen to him if his friends found out he was the murderer? What will Sandy think of him once he said his reason? He didn't know, and he was afraid to find out. Finally, after a whole day, Dr. Teeth was taken into the interrogation room, where he sat at a table across from Zia, who had a device of some sort sitting in front of her.

"Well, Dr. Teeth, how long have you known Zoot?" Zia asked.

"Well, I can't be too certain, but ever since kindergarten. So a long time," Dr. Teeth answered.

"I see, and what happened the last time you saw Zoot?" Zia asked.

"Well, I was heading out to my bus and I saw him leaving the theater. He seemed very angry and-," Dr. Teeth began to lie, until a light on the machine on the table started to glow a very bright red.

"What does that mean?" Dr. Teeth asked, confused.

Zia smirked and said, "It means you're lying."

Dr. Teeth's eyes widened in horror. Truth be told, he had assumed the gizmo was a tape recorder of some sort! Not a lie detector! He didn't think things like those didn't exist yet! He knew he was toast!

"Listen, I would never hurt Zoot. He's my friend!" he shouted.

"Would you kill him for the sake of someone joining the Muppets? Like a girl, perhaps?" Zia questioned.

"No way, not even for the sake of a girl joining the Muppets," Dr. Teeth said. The light blinked red.

Zia leaned forward, propping her chin on her hands and asked, "Teeth, you're still lying a little. Tell me what happened. What really happened on the night Zoot was killed?"

"I…I don't remember!" Dr. Teeth stated. The light blinked red again.

"Yes you do," Zia said. "Now tell the truth right now!" The woman stood up from her chair and looked down at the keyboardist.

"But I didn't do it!" Dr. Teeth denied. The light blinked red.

"Yes you did! Dr. Teeth, if you confess, I promise I will not do any harm to you!" Zia shouted.

Dr. Teeth then stood up in his chair and yelled at the top of his lungs, "FINE! I DID IT! I KILLED ZOOT! MY OWN BEST FRIEND! I DRUGGED HIM AND THREW HIM INTO THE RIVER! JUST LIKE HOW YOU THOUGHT!" He froze, realizing what he just said. He and Zia looked at the lie detector, but it did not react to his statement. Dr. Teeth confessed his crime. Zia looked up at Dr. Teeth and smiled. The keyboardist slowly sat back down in his chair, where his dark green skin turned to a slightly lighter shade. He rubbed his forehead and eyes, trying to calm down. "You're right; I did kill Zoot. It was me," he muttered.

"And may I ask why?" Zia asked, curious.

Dr. Teeth looked the woman in the eye and explained, "You're right; I did kill Zoot for the sake of a girl joining the Muppets. You see, earlier that morning on the day I killed Zoot, I met this girl named Sandy in the park. Girl could play saxophone really well, and she was really beautiful. I knew she was the one for me, so I tried to get Kermit into letting her join the Muppets, but he said he wouldn't unless Zoot were to quit, disappear, or die. I was upset, but for some reason, I got that crazy idea to kill him so Sandy could join and I did it. And to be honest, I didn't regret it…at least, not until now."

"I see," Zia said, impressed Dr. Teeth would do such a thing. He was perfect for her offing group. "Well. Dr. Teeth, like I promised, I would not harm you if you confessed. You did exactly what I wanted you to," she said.

"You're not going to do anything to me? Not even arrest me after I killed Zoot?" Dr. Teeth asked, surprised.

"Yes, I'm going to let you go free, unless you do something for me," Zia said.

"What's that?" the keyboardist asked.

Zia pulled a small white card out of her pocket and placed it in front of Dr. Teeth. The musician looked at it to see it read "The Offing Group. Organization for Murderous Felons."

"Wait, is this some sort of business card for hit men?" Dr. Teeth asked.

"Yes," Zia confirmed.

"You're a cop, and you're suggesting I join some group of hit men?"

"Actually Dr. Teeth, it's my group of hit man. You see…I'm not really a cop," Zia admitted. She held up her badge, where Dr. Teeth got a good look at to see if didn't shine a little under the light like real police badges did. She wasn't a cop after all, but a hit man…well, woman.

"Wait, if you're not a cop, then how did you know what killed Zoot and that he was dead?" Dr. Teeth asked. It was his turn to use the lie detector.

"Well, what you did to Zoot is how my hit men off people; drug them, stuff them in a crate, and throw them into a crate," Zia told the Muppet. The light didn't blink.

"Okay, why do you want me to join?" Dr. Teeth asked. confused.

"Because you know how to off people, of course! And also, it's the only way I'll keep your secret away from the other Muppets," Zia explained very proudly.

"What! No, no, no! I'm not that kind of person. I killed Zoot because I let my attraction to Sandy get the best of me and it was the only way to get her to join the Muppets!" Dr. Teeth exclaimed. "But I wouldn't do that to a random person!"

"That's what most people say, but once they do it more, they begin to like it," Zia stated.

"Well, don't expect me to!" Dr. Teeth snapped as he got up from his chair and started to leave the room.

Zia then grabbed the card and forced it into Dr. Teeth's hand and said, "Take the card, Muppet. And call me if you want to reconsider. My door is always open, but I'll only give you until the end of the day."

Dr. Teeth bit his lip and left the room. After he shut the door, he saw Sandy holding the ring box that contained her engagement ring, which Dr. Teeth had planned to give her later, and a glass cup.

"Sandy? What are you doing here?" Dr. Teeth asked the girl Muppet, surprised she was there.

"You dropped this box when you went in here to be interrogated. I couldn't help but look inside and see the ring. Were you planning on proposing to me later?" Sandy asked.

Dr. Teeth took a deep breath and said, "Yeah, I was." He thought everything was going to be fine now and he could get on with his life now since he admitted his horrible deed from 5 years ago to someone.

Sandy looked at the box and back at the keyboardist. "You know…I'm idolized Zoot ever since I watched the Muppet Show. I had dreamed of meeting him one day and being like him. Now, that will never happen," Sandy added. She looked like she was close to tears, so Dr. Teeth was about to go over to her and hug her, but she held up her hand to stop him. "And also, I just wanted to say this," she added.

"What?" Dr. Teeth asked, curious.

Sandy looked down at the floor for a few moments, taking a deep breath, before looking Dr. Teeth in the eye and shouting, "I DON'T MARRY PEOPLE WHO KILL THEIR OWN FRIENDS FOR THE SAKE OF HAVING A GIRLFRIEND!" Then, without warning, Sandy smashed the glass cup on Dr. Teeth's head, making him realize that Sandy had used the cup to hear everything going on in the interrogation room. She heard him shout about killing Zoot! She knew now!

At that moment, Floyd, Animal and Lips barged into the room, upon hearing the shouting. "What in the name of Fats Waller is going on here!" Floyd shouted, until he noticed Dr. Teeth holding his head, broken glass on the floor, and a very ticked off expression on Sandy's face. "Hey! What'd you do to Dr. Teeth?" Floyd questioned the girl.

Sandy just dropped the ring box, shoved Floyd aside, and left the room.

"Hey! Get back here! I ain't done talking to you!" Floyd snapped.

"Bad woman! Bad woman!" Animal yelled.

"What happened, Doc?" Lips asked his friend, as he picked up the broken pieces of glass.

"Sandy dumped me," Dr. Teeth said.

After he said that, he could've sworn he saw Floyd muttered, "Hallelujah." But he wasn't surprised he did.

"And right before you could propose. Tough luck," Lips said, thought deep down, Lips thought it was good luck Sandy was probably going to be gone now.

Once Dr. Teeth, Floyd, Animal and Lips rejoined the other Muppets, Kermit told them Sandy quit the Muppets for some reason, which really surprised everyone, since they didn't know why.

"What happened in the interrogation room, Doc?" Scooter as his friend.

Dr. Teeth glanced at Scooter and said in a slightly sharp voice, "Nothing. Nothing at all."

The Muppets became frightened of this tone, since it was new of him to say something like that.

Sometime later, Dr. Teeth was alone in the canteen, except for Angel Marie who was cleaning in the kitchen. Dr. Teeth had the business card on the counter in front him, staring at it. He wasn't the type to kill someone. He just didn't think write when he tried to off Zoot 5 years ago.

At one point, while he was deep in thought, Angel Marie noticed the business card and asked, "Where did you get that?"

Dr. Teeth, coming back into reality, looked at the Muppet and said, "That 'cop' Zia. She says I'm the perfect hit man since I offed Zoot," Dr. Teeth explained. The keyboardist then went wide-eyed, realizing he just told Angel Marie he kill Zoot, and the musician looked at the monster, worried he would scream in terror, but he just stayed calm.

"Okay," Angel Marie said, shrugging it off.

"Shouldn't you be freaking out? I just admitted I killed Zoot!" Dr. Teeth half-shouted.

"Yeah, but I'm good at keeping secrets and I'm pretty sure you don't want anyone else knowing, right?" AM explained.

Dr. Teeth was silent for a few moments, before nodding, "Yeah, you do have a point. But as I was saying before, Zia wants me to be a hit man for her group. I don't think I will though."

"You're making the right choice, Teeth. You wouldn't like the sort of work they do, because I sure as heck don't, but quitting is not an option," Angel Marie stated.

"Yeah, thanks for the tip," Dr. Teeth said, until he figured out what Angel Mari just said. He looked at the monster, who looked at him, realizing what he said too.

Dr. Teeth grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and pulled him forward, where Dr. Teeth was making very strong eye contact with him. "Tell me what you know about this hit man group!" he demanded, sounding very tough.

Angel Marie cried out, "Okay! I'll talk! Ever since 1986, Zia had been forcing Kermit the Frog to off all of his friends! Clifford, Digit, Flash, Harry the Hipster! Any Muppet you've never seen again after they were on TV or in a movie! She forced him to knock them out with a drug of some sort and hand them over to her so she can shove them in boxes and dump them in the same river you dumped Zoot! We actually offed Robin yesterday! Don't hurt me!"

Dr. Teeth's jaw dropped open in shock and he released Angel Marie, who ran away. "They offed Clifford, Flash, Digit and Harry the Hipster? Why?" he thought. He remembered the first time he and the band met Harry in person during a break from filming _"The Muppets: A Celebration of 30 Years"_, where they were very glad to meet him. Harry even mentioned that he was a pretty good bass player, so Floyd Pepper let his use his bass. And when Harry the Hipster played, he was anything but square! He played so well, Dr. Teeth thought he was a lot better than Floyd, and Floyd must've agreed with him because Harry stopped playing, Floyd literally dropped to his knees, shouted at the top of his lungs "I AM NOT WORTHY!" And then he started to bow to Harry to the point where Zoot actually yelled at him to stop since all the other Muppets were starting to stare and laugh at him, but Zoot was laughing too.

Zoot…Dr. Teeth had never seen Zoot laugh before until that day. It was a rare sight, but it was nice to see the saxophonist enjoy the scenario.

Then there was Clifford, a purple Rastafarian Muppet that could play bongos pretty well! And he hosted Muppets Tonight and was part of the Jim Henson Hour band, Solid Foam, along with Digit and Flash.

Dr. Teeth became very good friends with them, since they were all musicians, but he became concerned when Harry the Hipster, Digit and Flash disappeared. First Harry, who vanished sometime after the special was premiered; Digit and Flash, who were gone after Jim Henson Hour was canceled; and Clifford, who disappeared in 2005 after Muppets Wizard of Oz premiered.

All Kermit said was that all those Muppets quit, but Angel Marie said Zia offed them…and Kermit knew the whole time.

Dr. Teeth ran out of the canteen and up to Kermit's office, where the frog was looking through many different scripts for skits, trying to figure out what to do on the Muppet Show now since Sandy quit and Robin and Walter are gone.

"Hey Frog!" the keyboardist shouted.

"Doc! What's wrong? You seem mad?" Kermit asked his friend, expressing concern.

"You were involved with it. You're the reason why a lot of our old friends are gone," Dr. Teeth sneered.

"Involved with what? What are you talking about, Dr. Teeth?" Kermit asked, confused.

"You know what!" Teeth shouted, which made the room shake a little.

"I don't know what you mean!" Kermit screamed in terror.

"I'm talking about this!" the keyboardist snapped, slapping the business card Zia gave him on Kermit's desk.

Kermit looked at it and gasped in horror before looking at Dr. Teeth in the eye and said, "It was you…you tried to off Zoot."

"Yeah, it was me. Zia wants me to be involved with this group and Angel Marie told me he and _you_ were involved. Care to elaborate, my amphibian friend?" Dr. Teeth asked his boss.

"Listen to me, Dr. Teeth! She forced me to kill my friends! I never wanted anything to do with it but I had no choice! SHE THREATENED THAT SHE'D KILL EVERY SINGLE MUPPET IN THE WORLD IF I DIDN'T!" Kermit screamed at the top of his lungs.

Dr. Teeth froze in shock from the sound of that. Zia wanted to kill every Muppet in the world? Why would she do that? He didn't know, but he was worried to find out.

"Okay then, I sort of believe you, but did you care that she was killing some of your old friends? She offed Sam from Sam & Friends, didn't she? The guy that got you started on showbiz right? And what about the guys from Jim Henson Hour, and Muppets Tonight! Did you not care about them, and what about Robin! Didn't you care about him!?" Dr. Teeth shouted. "And what if she decided to off more of us! What about Fozzie, the bear you call your best friend. What about Rowlf, the first Muppet to achieve as much fame as Sam did before you came into the scene? Or Gonzo? Or Scooter? Or even Miss Piggy?! Would you care if Zia offed any of them? Be honest, frog."

"Like I said, she forced me to off them! But just because I did it doesn't mean I didn't care about any of my old friends!" Kermit shouted. "Besides…you know they were like family to me, right? That includes everyone else at this theater!"

Dr. Teeth glared at Kermit, not believing it the slightest, and sneered, "You know…I could just run out of here and tell everyone what Zia had been forcing you to do to all our old friends. Rizzo and Pepe will be upset about Clifford and Seymour being offed…my band will be upset about you offing Harry the Hipster…Animal even called Yorick his new friend once, since they had a few things in common, mostly involving eating anything…I bet they'll be so upset they'll cry. And what about Walter? Your #1 fan? He'll hate you the most…"

"Doc! Didn't you listen to me?! I said I never wanted to hurt anyone! Zia was blackmailing me! I had no choice!" Kermit snapped.

"Then why didn't you go to the cops?" Teeth asked his boss.

"Zia said if she knew I called the cops, she'd get her subordinates to go around the world and kill all the other Muppets! I didn't want that! I never wanted that! And I cried when she took Robin away!" Kermit admitted. "And also, if you tell everyone about this, she'll kill us too! And how would you like it if I told everyone you killed Zoot? That'll be just as bad!"

"**YOU SHUT YOUR MOUTH**!" Dr. Teeth shouted, before punching his fist into Kermit's desk, breaking it directly in half!

Kermit yelped and jumped away. Within seconds, Scooter and Fozzie ran into the office, having heard the noise.

"Kermit! What's going on? We heard a loud-oh my gosh…" Scooter asked until he saw the broken table and a very ticked off Dr. Teeth.

"Doc! What'd you do?" Fozzie asked the keyboardist, mortified.

"Step off!" Dr. Teeth snapped before storming out of the room.

"What was that?!" Fozzie asked, shocked by Dr. Teeth's attitude.

"Kermit! What happened in here?" Scooter asked.

Kermit looked toward a wall and started to slam his head into it. "I don't want to talk about it. Can you two leave me alone for a while, please?" the frog asked his friends.

"Uh…sure, chief," Scooter said, as he and Fozzie left the room.

Kermit sat down on the floor and sighed. It was wrong of him to say that last comment to Dr. Teeth, but he couldn't help it. The frog glanced a picture of him, Dr. Teeth, Rowlf the Dog, Swedish Chef, and Waldorf standing with Jim Henson in a picture.

"Jim…what should I do?" he asked, as if the image would answer.

**Well, Dr. Teeth found out the truth Kermit had been hiding for nearly 30 years and Zia found out it was him who tried to off Zoot. **

**What will the keyboardist do now? **

**And what are the Offed Muppets doing? FInd out in Chapter 7 of Offed-Regret.**

**Please Follow, Favorite and/or Review!**


	8. Regret

Dr. Teeth walked out of the theater and went as far away as he could, so nobody could find him. He wasn't in the mood to talk to anyone at the moment. He couldn't believe Kermit had known Zia was offing Muppets, and he let her! But he didn't blame the frog to be honest. I mean, Zia was threatening the lives of so many other Muppets! That probably included the big group on Sesame Street and the little dudes in Fraggle Rock, heck, maybe even Constantine was on that list now! And he's the world's #1 criminal!

Dr. Teeth felt the ring box he had intended to give Sandy later, but she dumped him and left, never to see him again. He took it out and looked at it. He went down to the jewelry store and returned it, where he got all the money he had save up for back. He continued to walk down the street, now thinking about Zoot. He knew what he did to the saxophonist was wrong, and he regretted it terribly. He wondered if Zoot cried when he got to heaven and Jim, Richard, and so many others told him. He wished he had a way to make up for it, but he was sure he couldn't.

He thought back to his last conversation with Zoot, and he remembered the last thing Zoot said before he passed out: _"Well, to be honest, Doc, I think…I might…I think I…I love y-."_ Ever since then, Dr. Teeth wondered a little about who Zoot was going to say he loved. Then he remembered that Zoot mentioned beforehand that he felt different around him for some reason, and he didn't know why for a while, until that moment. Then, Dr. Teeth realized what Zoot was going to tell him that night: I love you.

Dr. Teeth stopped in his tracks and hit his head on the wall of a nearby building. "He was going to say he was in love with me! Why did I kill him! He probably thinks that I knew the whole time and I'm homophobic or something, but to be honest I…" Dr. Teeth muttered to himself until he stopped himself and mumbled, "No, I'm going to save that for later."

Dr. Teeth went on with his walk, still trying to clear his head, until a flower shop that had bluebells on display for sale caught his eye. He remembered that Zoot said he liked bluebells, and he said the reason was because they're bluebells and they look like they seemed to slouch a little, making it look like they were relaxed, while most flower stems are straight, kind of like him; blue and relaxed.

Zoot mentioned that when the Muppets visited a very popular flower garden in a place they were touring, which looked incredible. The girls enjoyed it, and Lips even made a comment about him liking buttercups, since they were yellow, but Pepe said it was unmanly to like flowers and stated it was a girly. That is, until every other male Muppet named their favorite flower; Kermit said lotuses since they were in the swamp, Fozzie said sunflowers, since his mother had some around her house, Gonzo said roses, since he thought it was fun to jump in them and see how sharp the thorns were, Rowlf said dogwood flowers, and he didn't need to explain why, Sam the Eagle said he liked any flower that was American, and Zoot said he liked bluebells.

After that, Pepe gave in and admitted he liked orange carnations, which told everyone that he was insecure about liking things like that.

Dr. Teeth then got an idea. He went into the flower shop and bought a bouquet of bluebells, which he planned to take to the bridge, where Zoot was killed.

Meanwhile, at the bridge, Walter, Robin, Sam, Zondra and Zoot were underneath it, collecting rocks.

"Okay, tell me again why we're doing this?" Zondra asked, annoyed.

"Robin likes collecting rocks," Walter restated for what had to be the fifth time.

Ever since he joined the Offed Muppets the night before, Zondra seemed to try to get on his nerves, which didn't work since he was a patient Muppet, but earlier today, Zondra took him to the city, where she showed him how to jump from car to car, which was pretty tricky at first, until she decided to help him. It was also kind of fun!

"The rocks are really shiny down here!" Robin exclaimed, taking a pick of the litter.

There were many different colored rocks, like black, white, gray, brown, and even a few a light pink or green! Sam explained it probably had to do with the fast moving river eroding the rocks over the years, explaining why they were so smooth, but he couldn't explain the colors. Robin wanted to keep a rock collection in his new cave, which was smaller than the other caves in the Offed Muppets' home, but it was big enough to keep such a collection.

"Here's a neat one. It has a hole in it, which is very rare," Sam said, handing one to Robin.

"Cool! Do you think it got there because of erosion, Sam?" the little frog asked, wanting to know.

"Must be. It makes the most sense," Sam said.

"This is ridiculous," Zondra muttered, until she heard footsteps overhead. She waved her arms at the other four Muppets.

"What's wrong?" Walter asked a little too loudly.

Zondra rushed over to him and covered his mouth with her hand. "SHH!" she hushed him and pointed upward.

"Someone's on the bridge," Sam whispered.

All the Muppets just stood where they were, in silence, until the footsteps stopped in the middle of the bridge.

Zondra released Walter and whipped out a compact mirror, which she used the reflection to look up at the bridge, where she saw Dr. Teeth. "It's Dr. Teeth," she stated.

"Let me at him!" Zoot hissed, about to run out from under the bridge and go up to the keyboardist and give him the worse beating of his life, but Sam and Walter held him back and Walter covered the saxophonist's mouth before he had the chance to protest. Zondra did the quiet sign towards the three men and looked up at Dr. Teeth.

Dr. Teeth stared at the river for a few seconds and then looked at the bluebells in his hands. He took a deep breath and looked back at the river. Finally, he shouted, "Zoot! I'm not sure if you can hear me since you're not exactly alive, but I hope you can, because I have a lot of things to say."

Zoot froze and seemed to glance up at the bridge, where he could Dr. Teeth's voice.

"Zoot…I came to tell you…I'm sorry. I'm sorry I killed you 5 years ago. I wasn't thinking straight back then, and now I know it was a huge mistake because now everyone in the Muppet Theater are grieving for you. Don't think that I did that because I hated you all my life, when the truth is that…I've always cared about you and I always will, even if you're up there, with Jim, Richard, Jerry and so many others," Dr. Teeth went on.

Zoot's mouth dropped in surprise and he started to move forward, where Walter and Sam released him so he could hear more of what Teeth had to say.

"And I just recently figured out what you were trying to tell me before you passed out; you were going to say you loved me, weren't you?" Dr. Teeth stated.

Zondra gasped and looked at Zoot. She had no idea the saxophonist was gay since he dated Janice during the 1st season of the Muppet Show. Sam and Walter were surprised as well, but Robin just smiled at the saxophonist. Zoot's eyes widened behind his sunglasses, shocked Dr. Teeth had known.

"If that's what you were going to say, it's okay, because…I love you too!" Dr. Teeth shouted.

Zoot gasped and covered his mouth. Zondra noticed tears were starting to stream from under his sunglasses, where he whipped them off and quickly covered his eyes, where he revealed he was biting his lip, trying to refrain from crying aloud.

Dr. Teeth sighed, glad to have that off his chest, and looked at the bluebells, which he held over the side of the bridge, and dropped them into the river.

Robin immediately jumped in and retrieved them before they were lost and gave them to Zoot, who saw they were bluebells.

"He remembered these were my favorite…" Zoot muttered, uncovering his eyes, revealing his eyes were pretty much like any average Muppet, only they were horizontal ovals that were small enough to hide behind his sunglasses.

Dr. Teeth put his hands in his pockets, about to walk away until he felt the business card Zia gave him earlier inside. He pulled it out and looked at for a few seconds, before scowling and throwing it out into the river.

By luck, a wind blew the piece of paper under the bridge and it landed in front of Walter, who picked it up.

"What's that?" Zondra asked the Muppet, walking over to look.

"It looks like a business card for…'The Offing Group: Organization for Murderous Felons', and there's a phone number, address and…Zia's name!" Walter gasped.

"Give it to me Walter," Sam said.

Walter handed the veteran Muppet the card, which Sam observed for a few moments before his mouth open and he had a look of joy in his eyes.

"What's wrong, Sam?" Walter asked.

"I tell you once we get back to the cave," Sam whispered.

After Dr. Teeth left, the five Muppets ran back to the cave, where Sam shouted, "Everyone! Gather in the basement! I have wonderful news!"

All the other Muppets immediately started following the group of five down to the basement, where a few others were. Sam pulled out a soap box and stood on it. The crowd of Muppets talked amongst themselves, wondering what was going on, until Walter whistled very loudly, grabbing everyone's attention.

"Thank you, Walter," Sam said.

"No problem, Sam," Walter replied.

"Okay! Now since I have all of your attention! I have wonderful news! See this card in my hand?" Sam asked his friends, holding up the business card.

Everyone tried to take a closer look it, trying to figure out what it said until Digit finally said, "It's a business card, but I can't tell what it says. I need to upgrade my vision…"

"Correct, Digit! It is in fact a business card, but not any business card," Sam stated.

"What makes that one so special?" Clifford asked, curious.

"Because Clifford, this is the business card for Zia's hit men group!" Sam exclaimed.

Everyone in the room gasped for a few seconds before cheering very loudly.

"Alright! After all these years, we can finally move on with the plan Pierre stared 50 years ago!" Harry the Hipster shouted.

"Pierre the rat?" Walter asked, not knowing who the Muppet was.

"Pierre was actually the first Muppet ever. He was the one that taught Sam everything he knew before Sam got his own show, and that knowledge was passed down to Kermit," Vicki explained.

Walter gasped, "Really! That's incredible! But what's this plan you mentioned?"

"Pierre's plan to put an end to Zia's wrongdoing and freeing all the Muppets, of course!" Icky Gunk stated.

"But how are we going to do that?" Walter asked.

"Well Walter, Pierre had originally planned to use a radio to broadcast everything to the world, but in modern day, you have television, which is a more effective way of spreading information," Sam explained.

"We're going to spread this information around the whole city!" Walter gasped.

Zondra then said, "Better; the entire world!"

Walter gasped and asked, "Wow! That's incredible! But how do we broadcast it on television? And who's going to be on camera?"

"Our good android, Digit, here, will hack into every television station in the world and broadcast our video there," Sam explained. "And as for the person who will be speaking-."

"Sam of course!" Harry the Hipster said.

Sam shook his head and said, "No Harry, it can't be me. Nobody knows who I am, so the message won't be as affective, and I'm very old. People will assume I'm crazy. It has to be someone who the public is familiar with, but who?"

Then, every Muppet in the room looked at Walter, getting really excited expressions on their faces. "Me? No, no, no, people are still getting used to the idea that I'm a Muppet. I'm still pretty much the new Muppet on the block," Walter said.

"Walter, you got to do it! I believe in you! We all do!" Robin exclaimed.

Zoot stepped up and said, "If you're afraid to do it alone, I'll go on camera too. Besides, a certain man in the Muppets might be very glad to see me alive." Zoot looked down at the bluebells in his hands and smiled.

Zondra walked up and said, "I'll go up too, if you want! Heck, I'll even use the stiff American accent I had in the Jim Henson Hour! Besides, I'm sure Rizzo and Bobo the Bear will recognize me since I was on Muppets Tonight with those blokes."

"Wow, thanks you guys!" Walter exclaimed, smiling.

Within seconds, all the Offed Muppets started scattering around, grabbing what they needed for the big broadcast. A camera, a teleprompter, lighting, they were going to need whatever was useful.

Finally, after setting everything up, Robin motioned Walter in front of the camera. It was a very expensive looking and high-tech camera, which Walter assumed they stole a long while back. He had the business card in his hand, and Zondra and Zoot, who was back to wearing his sunglasses, standing on the sidelines, waiting to walk on when cued by Vicki.

Walter took a deep breath, somewhat nervous about what was about to happen. Sam turned on the teleprompter and Clifford operated the camera.

"Worldwide Broadcast, take one, and…action!" Vicki shouted.

Walter looked at his friends and then back at the camera, which Clifford turned on.

**Things are about to get epic and crazy! **

**How will the Muppets react to the broadcast? **

**How will Dr. Teeth react to see Zoot alive? **

**How will Kermit react to seeing every single Muppet alive?! **

**How will Zia react to the Offed Muppets being alive and revealing her information? **

**Find out in the next chapter of Offed-The Broadcast seen Around the world!**

**Please Follow, Favorite, and/or Review!**


	9. The Broadcast seen Around the World!

The next morning, all the Muppets were in the canteen, eating breakfast, since they had slept in accidently and had to rush to the theater.

Dr. Teeth, remembering what he did last night, felt better about himself that morning. He was sure he made peace with Zoot's spirit and now he can go on with his life without feeling terrible about what he did. Then, he remembered he said a lot of bad things to Kermit the day before, which brought back the bad feeling, but he was right to confront Kermit about, though he didn't intend to destroy Kermit's desk.

Kermit was alone in his office, sitting at his desk which Beauregard repaired earlier, looking through some papers. He saw there were still a few cracks in the wood, which reminded the frog of the argument he had with Dr. Teeth the night before. Dr. Teeth now knew the truth involving Zia offing a lot of the Muppets, and Kermit now knew Dr. Teeth was the one that tried to off Zoot, and Kermit also knew that Zoot was actually still alive, but he didn't want to tell Dr. Teeth that, mainly because Dr. Teeth might get mad again. Kermit then remembered that he said that he'd tell the other Muppets that Dr. Teeth murdered Zoot if the keyboardist told everyone what had been going for the last 30 years. The frog took the last sip of his coffee and decided to go down there and get more. Maybe this'll give him the chance to make peace with Dr. Teeth, before things got worse.

Somewhere else in the city, Walter, Sam, Digit, Zondra and Zoot were working on hacking the TV stations.

"Okay, we're going to have to wait a few minutes before it's ready," Digit told everyone.

"I can't believe we're actually going to do this!" Walter exclaimed.

"Don't get too excited. Things might not go as well as we planned. Someone might figure out how to take it down before it's done," Zondra warned the boy.

Walter nodded and waited patiently.

"What are we going to do after this?" Zoot asked Sam.

"We head back to the cave as fast as we can and get ready for the attack on Zia's headquarters to commence on the news of course," Sam said.

"Sam, why can't we just attack her ourselves?" Walter asked his friend.

"We're Muppets, Walter. We can't fight. We're not supposed to be violent. We're supposed to be sweet and loving," Sam explained.

"Good point," Walter said, nodding.

"Okay! It's all ready to go! Let the broadcasting commence! Zondra, if you please?" Digit asked the girl.

Zondra nodded and pulled the lever. Hacking into TV stations was easy for her since she, Ubu and Chip did it all the time on Jim Henson Hour every now and then, mostly to put up her own material.

Sam took out a telescope and focused on the big screened TV in the middle of LA. They had intended to get the video on there, and if it turned on there, then it was being shown all over the world. Around the world, people watching TV started to notice that their television sets were acting odd, for one thing, the program everyone was watching stop and there was now a black screen with a blue loading bar on it. The Muppet Theater was one of those places.

"What's up with the TV?" Rizzo asked.

"I don't know! I can't change the channel! Look, I'm trying as we speak," Fozzie said, pressing the buttons on the remote.

"Does it have batteries?" Gonzo asked the bear.

"I just put some in yesterday!"

"Wait, whatever the TV is loading, it's almost done," Floyd said, pointing at the screen. The bassist was right; there was only a centimeter left to load, and when it was done, the screen turned blue, then static, and finally, Walter was onscreen!

"It worked!" Sam hollered.

"Yes!" Zondra exclaimed.

"Cool!" Walter shouted in awe.

"WALTER!" all the Muppets in the theater screamed in shock.

"Hello, I'm Walter. You probably know me from the Muppets. And you're probably wondering what I'm doing in what looks like an old cave. Well, I'm about to tell you, so don't touch anything on the remote or the TV set and stay tuned in," Walter said onscreen.

Around the world, everyone was now watching what was going on TV right now. Everyone on Sesame Street was literally crowded around the little TV that was now set outside of Hooper's store to see what was happening.

Doc, Sprocket and all the Fraggles were sitting around the TV in Doc's workshop, ready to see what was about to occur.

In Smalltown, Gary and Mary were in their home until someone called them to turn on the TV. Gary did so and the married couple was very surprised to see Walter on it.

In Siberia, Russia, Constantine was in the cafeteria eating gruel, while the other inmates were watching TV until one of the prisoners shouted, "Hey Constantine! That kid that helped that frog, Kermit, stop your Crown Jewel Heist is on TV!"

Constantine looked up from his breakfast and was surprised to see Walter on TV. "Little boy?" the evil frog said, confused.

Nadya, upon hearing the commotion, entered the cafeteria to stop the noise, but saw what got every going crazy and decided to see why the Muppet was on TV.

At Interpol headquarters, every single Interpol agent was watching the TV, which had subtitles so most of the agents could understand what Walter was going to say. Jean Pierre Napoleon was sitting way up front, wanting to know what was going on the most.

"Well, there's been something deep and dark going on behind the Muppets for nearly 30 years. Before I explain what, I'm going to ask the public a few things. Do you remember any one these characters?" Walter held up a picture of the cast of _Sam & Friends_. "This is the cast of Sam & Friends, the first Muppet TV show that aired in the 50s." Walter held it close to the camera to the people had a closer look at the image.

Then he said it down and picked up a few other photos. "This was the cast of Jim Henson Hour." He held up the picture of Vicki, Lindbergh, Waldo C Graphic, and Leon. Then he held up an image of the original Solid Foam Band, finally, he held a picture of Gorilla Television up to the camera.

"Okay, now these are characters from Muppets Tonight." Walter said, setting the photos down and picking up a few more pictures. He held up an image of Clifford, Spamela Hamderson, Seymour the Elephant, Mr. Poodlepants, the Muppets Tonight Band, and he was about to hold up another until he seemed to stop and asked someone off-screen, "Should I show them this one? It's basically you by yourself with a guitar."

A British voice answered quietly, "Sure, go on."

Walter then held up a picture of Zondra when she was playing the role of Darci. Then Walter set the pictures down and said, "A majority of you probably have no idea who they were, but for the minority of the public that do, you're all probably wondering whatever happened to those guys? They were funny, talented, and made great shows. Well hang tight because I'm about to tell you."

"Say, those were Muppets we knew! I nearly forgot about Solid Foam," Floyd Pepper stated.

"Yeah, and someone told me that Seymour's green card expired, okay," Pepe said, sounding a bit skeptical.

"I know that girl with the guitar! That was Darci. She was on Real World Muppets with me, Bobo and Clifford," Rizzo added.

"Quiet! I can't hear what Walter's saying!" Miss Piggy hissed.

"Well excuse me! I had no idea it was against the law to think about the past!"

"You see everyone, what happened to these Muppets had to be the most horrible thing to happen to them. You see, they were _offed_," Walter explained.

Everyone watching gasped in horror, but a few of the younger public had no idea what Walter meant, so they were wondering why the adults were freaking.

"Allow me to explain how they were 'disposed of'; you see, they were drugged unconscious, shoved into a wooden crate, and thrown into the river just outside of LA. Shocking, yes? But it doesn't end there, the person that's behind it all makes the person they're forcing to do this to lie to the other Muppets saying the Offed Muppets quit, when that is completely untrue! However, don't cry, because I have a little bit of good news about the Offed Muppets. You see, in 1986, Sam, Harry the Hipster and Yorick of Sam & Friends survived being offed and fortunately, their crates washed up onshore, where they broke out and hid from society for the last 30 years, and during that time, they helped save the lives of many other Muppets being offed by stopping their crates from going too far downstream. Also in that time, they found out why all the old Muppets or Muppets that had TV shows that didn't last long were being offed; they weren't popular enough and they were thrown out to make sure the modern Muppets stay popular. But then, one Muppet decides to take a second shot at fame, who only lasted for 2 seasons of Muppets Tonight and managed to get in as a background character in some movies. Everyone, Zondra, who some of you Muppets Tonight fans may identify as Darci."

Zondra took a deep breath and walked on-screen, which made all the Muppets that knew Zondra or Darci jaws drop. Zondra cleared her throat and spoke in the voice she had in Jim Henson Hour, her stiff and American accent. "Walter is correct; someone had been forcing someone we know to off all the Muppets. I was gone for nearly 3 years until there were auditions for Muppets Tonight. I figured I'd get another shot at fame, so I decided to go on and audition, but I gave myself the name Darci, and for a while, Muppets assumed we were related, when truth be told, we were the same person. After Muppets Wizard of Oz, I, along with Clifford, Chip, and many others, were offed and got back here thanks to Sam. I haven't shown myself to the public for a long time until now, so now you know Walter is telling the truth that we all survived."

"But sometimes, not being popular enough isn't the only reason a Muppet is offed," Zoot said off-screen, before walking on-screen.

"OHMIGOSH! ZOOT'S ALIVE!" Janice cried.

"Oh, thank god. I thought we lost him…wait a second, if he's alive, then why did that cop Zia say he was dead?" Lips wondered.

"I don't know man, but it looks like we're about to find out," Floyd said.

Dr. Teeth stared at the screen wide-eyed and his mouth wide open in shock. Zoot was alive! Did Sam save him, assuming he was offed? Did Zoot know it was him that committed the crime? Did Zoot hear him shout his apology? Did Zoot know he loved him? Dr. Teeth was so deep in thought, that he ignored what Zoot said.

"Sometimes, Muppets are offed so some new Muppet could take their place in the show. That's what happened to me, because I saw the replacement when I tried to return to the theater. I was very upset, but I couldn't hold it against my friends for replacing, mainly because they had no idea what happened to me," the saxophonist explained.

"I knew it! Sandy! She has to be behind Zoot being offed!" Floyd shouted.

"But Sandy had to be like, a kid when all those other Muppets were offed. Maybe she's a small part of the operation," Janice assumed.

Robin then jumped on-screen, shouting, "I was offed too! And not that long ago!"

"Robin, what are you doing? It was supposed to be just the three of us doing this?" Walter asked the little frog.

"Walter! I'm evidence that this person is still offing Muppets! I'm Robin the Frog, Kermit the Frog's nephew, and I was offed 2 days ago!" Robin exclaimed.

Every person in the world gasped in horror. How could this person try to kill someone so young? But most importantly, who was this cold, heartless, Muppet-hating person behind it all?

"Now, after seeing all the evidence we have of this going on, you're all probably wondering who is behind it all. Well, I'll tell you; it's this group called the Offing Group: Organization for Murderous Felons. It's a team of hit man that had been trying to kill all the old Muppets, and they're all in LA. They're led by a woman by the name of Zia," Walter stated. The Muppet held up the business card and showed it to the camera and added, "I have a business advertising their little group. It reveals their address, phone number, and their boss's name. The address is…"

As Walter stated the address, several police forces, SWAT teams, and government agents wrote down it down, planning on going down to the building and put an end to the group.

"These people, as we've told you, are starting to off Muppets from the Muppet Show, and after they're done with them, who knows who'll be next; Sesame Street, Fraggle Rock, every single Muppet will be picked off until they're all gone," Zondra stated in a cold voice, making every Muppet watching the TV tremble in fear.

Everyone also noticed Walter whispered to her, "You didn't have to say it in that creepy tone, you know." where Zondra replied "What? I'm probably right. Had to be said."

Walter, shaking his head and looking back at the camera, said, "Everyone, what Zia's group is doing is completely wrong, and they have, no, **need** to be stopped! And soon, before they continue to do it! Please, help us take them down for good! This has been Walter of the Muppets, and this has been a warning to all Muppets. Be aware." And with that, the TV went back to static, and then the original program that had been on before the broadcast turned back on.

Everyone in the world was frozen in shock, surprised what they had just witnessed. Was it true? Were the world's most beloved Muppets being killed for the sake of popularity? They all decided to trust Walter and everyone wen about, trying to get to the bottom of things.

Zia and her henchmen had been watching everything and Zia was fuming with rage. So much rage, she whipped out a gun and shot at the television, practically destroying the screen!

She then shouted, "Everyone! To the warehouse outside of town! Cops are going to be here soon! We have to move now!"

Everyone ran out of the building, got in their vehicles and drove off as fast as they could. Except for Zia, who got on a black motorcycle and drove off in another direction, heading for the Muppet Theater.

On Sesame Street, all the characters were panicking a little, worried for their lives, until Alan did a loud whistle, catching all of their attention.

"Everyone! Calm down! Everything is going to be alright!" Gordon shouted.

"How do you know? Those people might be going after us at this very second!" Telly screamed.

"Telly, Walter said that those people are all in LA. They won't be getting here anytime soon," Bob told the monster.

"But shouldn't we be doing something to help the Muppets in LA? Their lives are in danger," Abby Cadabby.

"Yeah, and they're our friends, aren't they?" Grover asked.

"Sorry everyone, but it's far too dangerous," Maria said.

"Come on, Maria! We got to do something! It'd be wrong to just leave them hanging like this! We can't let those bad guys win before the cops get them. We got to do this, for freedom, for justice, for honesty!" Bert stated.

"A lot of us have known Kermit for years, Gordon. We can't just stand by and not help him and his friends. It'd be like abandoning him," Herry Monster added.

"And besides, fighting villains will be a lot more fun than staying here and waiting for the fight to be over," Oscar added.

After that, all the Muppets started pleading the humans to let them go and help their Muppet friends in LA. After a while, the adults gave in.

In Doc's workshop, Gobo Fraggle asked Doc, "Doc, what's a hit man?"

"A hit man is a person, or a Silly Creature as you call them, that kills certain people for money," Doc explained.

"Kill! They kill people! We won't stand a chance!" Boober Fraggle screamed.

"What are we going to do, Doc?" Mokey asked the human.

"Here's what we're not going to do; stand here and let our friends in LA get hurt like cowards. My Fraggle friends, we're going to Los Angeles and we're going to help them stop those bad people," Doc stated.

"Really? We're going to fight them!?" Wembly Fraggle gasped.

"Yep, go round up all the Fraggles you know can help and see if they can help. We have a war to fight!" Doc exclaimed.

"Alright! Let's go!" Red Fraggle cheered, running into the Fraggle cave.

"We'll see if we can get the Doozers to help too!" Gobo said, running into the cave as well, followed by his friends.

In Smalltown, Gary was heading outside to the car. Mary went after him. "Gary, where are you going?" she asked, frantically.

"Mary, Walter and all the other Muppets are in danger. We have to help them in some way. And also, Walter's my brother," Gary stated.

"But, how are you going to get there fast enough? It's a long drive to LA from here," Mary asked her husband.

"Did you forget already? The car Fozzie gave us as a wedding present? It can travel by map!" Gary stated with a big smile.

"Oh…well that was convenient. Let's go," Mary said, before joining her husband to head down to Los Angeles.

In Siberia, Constantine was in the middle of breaking out of the gulag. He had to get to America fast. He was not going to let Zia get away with this crime, mainly because, if she succeeds in her plan in getting rid of every Muppet in the world, she'll be dubbed the most dangerous criminal in the world, and then he'll be #2!

Nadya and the prison guards were going after the frog as he ran. "Constantine! Stop! You cannot break out of prison!" she shouted.

"Yes I can! And I have a good reason to right now! If Zia succeeds in her plan, she'll be #1 criminal! I'm in the middle of defending my title here!" Constantine protested.

"Hold it, Constantine! If you're going to stop Zia, you'll have to take me and the guards with you! We want to stop her too!" Nadya stated.

Constantine stopped in his tracks and looked back at the woman. "You're kidding, right?" the evil frog, assumed.

"No, Constantine. I am very serious right now. Also, I am not going to let that woman hurt Kermit! I have to save him!" Nadya stated.

"Let us come too!" Big Papa shouted.

"Yes, we are friends of Kermit as well, and we want to go to America as well and help him. Nadya, can we go as well?" Prison King asked.

"That all depends if Constantine will allow me and the guards to assist him as well," Nadya said.

The guards and prisoners stared at the frog for a few moments. Constantine observed their determined expression for a few seconds until he said, "Fine, you can come to, but as long as you don't slow me down!"

"Wonderful, let's go," Nadya said. She, Constantine, the Russian Prison Guards and the prisoners of the Gulag proceeded to walk out of the Gulag and set out to America.

Outside of Interpol, Jean Pierre Napoleon got into his car, Le Maximum, stepped on the gas and sped out of the city. If there was a criminal on the loose that could be a threat to every Muppet in the world, that would include the ones that lived in Europe, and he had to stop them before they could try, and it didn't even matter how long it would take to get to LA, even if it involved him having to do underwater to do so!

**Well, looks like the broadcast got out to the public and the news is starting to spread like wildfire! And some other Muppets are going to LA to help their friends. **

**What will happen once Zia confronts the Muppets? **

**What will the Offed Muppets do next? **

**Will the Muppets stay out of the fight or will they end up starting it? Find out in the next chapter of Offed-The Muppets Escape!**

**Please Follow, Favorite, and/or Review!**


	10. The Muppets Escape Danger

Meanwhile, back at the Muppet Theater, the Muppets were all talking discussing what had occurred on TV.

"Has someone really been trying to off our friends?"

"I don't know. All we know is that Walter knew about it, and Zondra, Zoot and Robin were victims!"

"What do we do? Should we go look for them?"

"How? We don't even know where any of them are?"

"Walter said he was in a cave, but he wasn't specific where?"

"I hope Robin is okay."

"We have to find them!"

The only ones that weren't speaking were Dr. Teeth and Kermit, who were surprised Walter did such a thing. They were sure Zia was going to be onto them, and they weren't wrong.

At that very moment, Zia parked her motorcycle in an alley near the theater, entered the building and went about it, shouting, "KERMIT! DR. TEETH! WHERE ARE YOU?!"

All the Muppets jumped at the sound of the woman's shouts and some of them were debating whether or not to run, mainly Dr. Teeth and Kermit. Finally, Zia barged into the canteen, where she looked down at all the Muppets from the top of the steps until she saw Dr. Teeth and Kermit. She pointed at them and said, "You two. Kermit's office. Now."

Dr. Teeth and Kermit immediately went up the steps and followed the woman out of the room, knowing they were going to get the worse scolding of their lives. All the other Muppets just watched them leave, until they were sure they were gone and Floyd asked, "Who the heck was that?"

"Whoever she was, she was like, rully rude," Janice stated.

"And her hair looked awful!" Miss Piggy added.

Scooter looked at a button and a small speaker on the wall. The go-fer slowly approached the button and pressed it.

Upstairs, in Kermit's office, Zia was sitting behind Kermit's desk, which Dr. Teeth and Kermit in front of her. She had a very ticked off expression on her face and snarled, "You told him didn't you."

"Tell who what?" Kermit said, confused. He decided it was now a pet peeve of his that people weren't being specific.

Zia looked at Kermit and said, "You told Walter my group was offing Robin after all! And you told him to tell every Muppet in the world." Then she glared at Dr. Teeth and sneered, "And you went down to that river and give him the business card, didn't you Teeth!"

"No, Zia! It's all a misunderstanding! I never told Walter anything! I swear I didn't!" Kermit shouted.

"And I threw out the business card. By the way, I have no interest in joining your group," Dr. Teeth stated. "After I threw it out at the river, Walter must've found it! I know that must've happened!"

Downstairs, Gonzo said, "Did Kermit just call that woman Zia? Is she the one Walter warned us about?"

Scooter shrugged and kept listening.

"Don't bother telling me all this…crap! I know you're lying to me! Kermit, did you forget what I told you what would happen if you turned your back on me? I'd kill every Muppet in the world, including you! And Dr. Teeth, don't forget I know it was you who tried to kill Zoot 5 years ago just so that girl Sandy could join! I can tell the Muppets anytime I want!" Zia snapped.

All the Muppets in the canteen gasped at the sound of the last statements. Kermit was involved with offing the Muppets! And Dr. Teeth was responsible for knowing how Zoot ended up with them! The Electric Mayhem was mortified by the latter.

"Zia, I'm telling the truth, and I'm sure Dr. Teeth is too! We never said anything to anyone! And also, you think us spilling everything is bad, you're worse! You're the one that's been forcing me to kill my friends! I never wanted that!" Kermit screamed.

"And also, I regretted trying to kill Zoot! And another thing, I'm over Sandy!" Dr. Teeth added.

Zia glared at the two Muppets and asked, "You know, I'm going to go after those friends of yours that were supposed to be dead and kill them right?"

Kermit gulped nervously and Dr. Teeth gritted his teeth angrily. "You wouldn't. You don't even know where they are," Kermit said.

"Yeah, so have fun finding them," Dr. Teeth sneered.

"That's not all; I'm going to get you two idiots to help me! Whether you like it or not," Zia snarled.

"There's nothing you can do or say to make us help you," Dr. Teeth stated.

"Oh really?" Zia said, smirking sinisterly, telling Kermit she was up to something. She sat down in Kermit's chair and said, "You know, this isn't the first time someone found out about my little group. They tried to go to the cops and help you Muppets, but I managed to stop them and kill them before they could."

"Someone tried to save us? Who?" Kermit asked, wanting to know.

"Well, nobody too important…just Mr. Hooper, Richard Hunt, Jerry Nelson, Jane Henson, John Henson and Jim himself," Zia stated smugly.

Kermit and Dr. Teeth froze in shock. Kermit asked flatly, "Jim...Jim found out…and he tried to help us?"

"Yes, he did, but before he could, he got sick. It was easily curable, but I decided to give him some 'medicine' and off him," Zia sneered.

"You didn't…you couldn't…" Kermit muttered, close to tears.

Dr. Teeth's skin turned to a lighter shade of green, full of shock. He was told Jim had an illness that was too late…but Zia was saying he was actually close to full health and she killed him! Dr. Teeth glanced at the picture of Jim Henson on the wall, thinking "Is it true, Jim? Did Zia actually kill you?" The keyboardist glared at Zia for a few moments before shouting, "YOU'RE LYING! YOU'RE JUST TRYING TO GET US IN THE SPOTS IN OUR MINDS WHERE IT HURTS MOST!"

"I'm not lying, Dr. Teeth, I did kill Jim Henson," Zia stated.

"What about Richard Hunt? People say he died of AIDs, and John Henson, he died of a heart attack. Did you pay the doctors to tell us that?" Dr. Teeth questioned.

"Actually, in truth, Richard did die of AIDs, but he knew, but lucky for me, he passed. And John was actually in the middle of running to the cops to tell them about me when he had his heart attack. Luck was by my side a lot over the years," Zia sneered.

Kermit then asked, "What about Jane, Jerry and Mr. Hooper? How'd you kill them?"

"Well, I poisoned Jane, I found something that made Jerry's health issues involving COPD worse, and as for Mr. Hooper, well, he had a heart attack so again, I was lucky, but they all knew about what I was doing, and I knew they were going to report me," Zia stated.

"Zia, do you know how many holes are in that story of yours! I know you're lying!" Kermit shouted.

"Sorry, frog, I'm telling the truth. I was the one that got rid of your human friends," Zia said, casually with an evil grin.

"No…no, no, no, no! It can't be true! It can't be!" Kermit cried.

Downstairs, Janice was in tears and Floyd was full of rage. "She killed Jerry…oh man, now that's a bit too far," he grumbled.

Scooter was shaking from the last statement, since Richard was one of his friends and the idea of Zia killing him scared the Muppet.

"No matter what you say, Zia, I will not believe that you killed our human friends! There's just no way!" Dr. Teeth shouted. "And if you think that's going to make us help you get the rest of our friends that have survived being offed, think again! We're not going to help you! Ever!"

Zia stood up and sneered, "Then I guess I have no choice." Suddenly, without warning, Zia whipped out her gun and aimed it at the two Muppets. "If you won't help me, then I'll have no choice but to kill you!" she shouted.

Kermit and Dr. Teeth put their hands up out of fear, shaking. They both knew this was over for them. Zia glared at the two men, about to pull the trigger, until something caught her eye. "What's with that red light under that little round speaker?" she asked, pointing to the little speaker on the wall.

Kermit looked at it and stated, "Oh, that's the PA system. That means it's on…and it's coming from the canteen."

"What!" Zia shouted.

At that moment, Scooter took his finger off of the button for the PA system, and looked at his friends, seeming calm, until he screamed, "WE GOT TO GET OUT HERE! NOW!"

All the Muppets started to panic and run out of the theater, loading the Electric Mayhem bus as fast as they could. Zia dashed out of Kermit's office and barged back into the canteen, to find it empty.

"NO! You got to be kidding me!" she screamed. She ran back up to Kermit's office to see Dr. Teeth and Kermit were also now gone. "As if it couldn't get any worse," she muttered.

At the same time, Dr. Teeth and Kermit were running through the auditorium and made it outside.

"Okay, I think we lost her," Kermit panted, out of breath from running so fast. Then, the frog saw the Electric Mayhem bus driving away. "It's the bus! The others are escaping! We have to go with them!" Kermit shouted before he started to run after the speeding vehicle! "Guys! Guys! Wait for me! You forgot me! Fozzie! Piggy! Gonzo! Rowlf!" he shouted as loudly as he could, trying to get their attention.

Dr. Teeth stayed behind, thinking, "They'll never stop for us. Not after they heard that Kermit was involved with offing the other Muppets and I just tried to kill Zoot 5 years ago. I have to find Zoot and see if he's really okay!" The keyboardist started to run in the opposite direction, heading towards the bridge outside of town.

Back with Kermit, the frog was still chasing the bus, but was having no luck. He was starting to get tired and he was sure nobody could hear him. If he stopped now, that would increase Zia's chances of catching him and killing him! And there was no way he was going to let that happen!

Finally, Rizzo and Pepe looked out the back of the bus to see their boss going after them. "Uh, guys, Kermit is chasing the bus," Rizzo stated.

"Should we let him on? He knew about Muppets being offed, okay," Pepe stated.

"True, but he said he never wanted to do that, and I think Walter knew that but he also knew Kermit was innocent," Rowlf stated.

"Yeah, that's true. Let him on, guys!" Scooter commanded.

Rizzo and Pepe opened the back door of the bus and Rizzo shouted, "Kermit! Jump on!"

Kermit nodded and took a very big jump, where he luckily landed inside the moving bus. "Thanks guys. Listen, I'm sorry I hid that terrible secret from you, but Zia was threatening to kill all the Muppets in the world. I had no choice…" Kermit said sorrowfully, but Fozzie said, "Don't worry about it, Kermit. We forgive you."

"Yes, Kermie, we know how hard it was for you to do that," Miss Piggy said, hugging the frog.

"Thanks you guys. You're the greatest friends I could have," Kermit said with a smile.

"Wait! Like, where's Dr. Teeth?" Janice asked.

"What! I thought he was right behind me!" Kermit shouted, mortified his friend hadn't followed him. He looked out the back of the bus, trying to find him, but had no luck. "I don't see him!" he shouted.

Sam the Eagle then stepped up and looked outside. "He's running in that direction!" the bird stated, pointing at a certain part of the sidewalk. Kermit squinted and he saw the eagle was right; Dr. Teeth was running in the opposite direction the bus was going!

"Where is he going?" Fozzie asked, also looking outside.

Kermit thought for a few moments until he said, "He's going to the bridge! He's going to find Zoot!"

"Zoot! If that's the case, I'm going with him," Floyd said.

"Floyd, are you sure that's a good idea? What if Zia sees you and kills you!" Kermit asked the bassist.

"I ain't scared of her! Dr. Teeth and Zoot are my friends, and I want to be sure they're both okay!" Floyd exclaimed.

"I'm going with you," Janice said, jumping up from her seat on the bus.

"Me too!" Lips added, getting up from his seat as well.

"Teeth! Zoot!" Animal shouted, running to the back of the bus, ready to jump off of it.

Kermit looked at the band for a few moments before he said, "Okay. Go get them. But if something bad happens, Animal, you try to get to my mansion in Hollywood. That's where we're going to hide for now and plan what to do next."

"Alright, let's move!" Floyd shouted.

"YEAH!" Animal shouted as he leapt off of the bus and landed on the road, where he started to run in the direction Dr. Teeth went. Floyd, Janice and Lips followed suit and went after the drummer.

"Guys! I could've stopped the bus!" Fozzie hollered to his friends, but they were already gone.

At that moment, Zia was in the alley, and she saw the band running in the direction of the old bridge where all the Muppets were offed. She smirked and whipped out her cell phone, where she made a few calls.

**Well, the Muppets forgave Kermit for hiding the secret, and now the rest of the Electric Mayhem is chasing Dr. Teeth, who is going to find Zoot.**

**Will Dr. Teeth find Zoot before Zia does? **

**What's going on with all the other Muppets? **

**What is Zia planning now? Find out in the next chapter of Offed-Capture and the Big Plan!**

**Follow, Favorite, and/or Review!**


	11. All the Muppets come Together

Meanwhile, in the Offed Muppets' cave, the Offed Muppets were sitting on the floor of the basement for what they wanted to happen; Zia's hit man group getting taken down. They were all crowded around a radio Sam had, which was connected to the station that had the news.

"How long is it going to take to talk about what happened on TV around the world?" Leon asked.

"Be patient, Leon. I don't think people that listened to the radio heard about it yet," Vicki stated.

Finally, after she said that, the newsman on the radio said, "And in more shocking news, earlier this morning, all of the TV stations around the world were hacked somehow and footage of Walter, a member of the Muppets, was on every TV station in the world. Walter told us that some hit man group was located in LA. Police forces in Los Angeles and SWAT teams pursued the building, but it was empty. But there was evidence that a lot of people lived there and they're now currently searching the buildings around the hide out."

"They fled the building!" Robin gasped.

"Uh-oh, that's not good. They probably saw Walter on TV revealing all their info and they made a break for it before the cops could get them. They might be searching for us as we speak. Sam, we're going to need some people to keep watch," Clifford said.

"I was just about to do that, Clifford. You, Walter and Zoot get the first watch. Zondra, Vicki and Spamela will get the next watch," Sam said.

"Sure thing, man," Zoot said as he, Walter and Clifford went up the ramp quickly and headed outside.

At that moment, Dr. Teeth had arrived at the bridge, out of breath. He looked over the railing and down at the rushing water down below before taking a deep breath and started trying climb over the railing.

"Dr. Teeth!" he heard someone shout, making him stop and stand on the ground again. He looked around until he saw Animal, Floyd, Janice and Lips run over.

"Floyd, Animal, Janice, Lips! What are you doing here?" Dr. Teeth asked his bandmates.

"We wanted to know what you're doing over here," Floyd Pepper stated.

"Yeah, like, what are you doing?" Janice asked.

"Wait, you mean you're not mad at me for killing Zoot just so Sandy could join the Muppets? I know you all hated her," Dr. Teeth said, confused.

"Well, we would've been a little pissed off if we didn't know you regretted it, which you said to Zia. We overheard," Floyd stated.

"Oh, well that's good," Dr. Teeth said.

"Now, what are you doing?" Lips asked.

"I'm trying to find Zoot," the keyboardist replied.

"But we don't rully know where he is. Walter said they were in a cave, but it wasn't, like, too specific," Janice said.

"True, but I have an idea," Dr. Teeth said.

"What's that?" Lips asked.

Dr. Teeth thought to himself for a few moments before he got an idea. "See this railing over here?" he asked his friends, gripping the railing.

"Yeah," the rest of the band nodded.

"Watch closely," Dr. Teeth told them.

Then, before any of the other musicians knew it, Dr. Teeth threw himself over the railing of the bridge and jumped into the river!

"AH! Dr. Teeth!" Janice screamed.

Floyd and Lips looked over the railing, watching as their boss got swept away. "Doc!" the two bandmates shouted before jumping into the river as well.

"Floyd! Lips! No!" Janice screamed.

The three Muppets were taken by the current within seconds and before they knew it, they were heading straight for the waterfall at the end of the river!

"Doc! What do we do now!?" Floyd shouted.

"I don't know! I was kind of hoping those Offed Muppets would've heard us jumping into the river and come out here to save us!" Dr. Teeth hollered.

"Bad plan, Doc! BAD PLAN!" Lips screamed.

After a while, the water engulfed the three musicians, where they all started to drown. Dr. Teeth thought to himself, "Maybe he didn't hear my apology yesterday! Maybe Zoot still hates me! Maybe all the Offed Muppet fled this area after they broadcasted that info! Man, how could I not think of that?"

Finally, Dr. Teeth saw a dark figure approach him and grab him by the collar on the back of his shirt. He felt himself being dragged on shore, where he saw Floyd sitting on the ground with a blanket wrapped around him. Walter was standing next to him. Dr. Teeth also saw Clifford walk out of the river, carrying Lips in his arms. The trumpeter was covering his face and Dr. Teeth could've sworn he was blushing. Dr. Teeth stood up and turned around to see who had saved him…only to see Zoot standing there.

Meanwhile, at the mansion Miss Piggy had built for Kermit and her, all the Muppets were hiding there.

"So, what now, chief? Now since the cops can't find Zia, she's probably going to be after us. We need to come up with a plan to stop her," Scooter asked the frog.

"I don't know, Scooter. Zia has a lot of henchmen. So many they outnumber us 10 to 1! We'll be doomed on our own," Kermit said.

"But can we at least try?" Gonzo asked. "We've dealt with worse; Doc Hopper, Nicky Holiday, Miss Bitterman, Tex Richman, Constantine! These guys will be nothing compared to them!"

"Actually Gonzo, Zia and her henchman can make all those other villains we've dealt with look like teddy bears," Kermit admitted.

"Whoa, you know it's bad if Kermit says someone is a teddy bear compared to someone else," Fozzie said.

"Should we go to the police?" Rowlf asked.

"We don't even know where Zia is. That old building she was in was the only place I knew about. She said she had a warehouse somewhere, but she wasn't too specific about where it was," Kermit explained.

"You're right, we are doomed," Rizzo said.

"So, what do we do? Wait here until she comes after us?" Miss Piggy asked.

"Well..." Kermit said, thinking, until he heard a loud knocking at the door.

All the Muppets gasped and started to hide around the room. Kermit gulped, worried about who was at the door. Gonzo ran out of the room and returned with a wooden mallet. "Don't worry, Kermit! I got your back!" the whatever exclaimed.

Kermit nodded and slowly approached the door, with Gonzo following close behind. Kermit stood in front of the door, gripping the handle and Gonzo stood by the door, waiting for Kermit to open. Kermit clicked the handle and threw open the door, resulting in a purple-red stranger to run inside.

"Kermit, we found y-!" the voice was saying until Gonzo screamed, "Villain!" and he started to beat the intruder with the mallet.

"Ow! Hey! Stop! It's just me!" the voice shouted as Gonzo attacked him.

"Gonzo stop!" Kermit shouted.

Gonzo did as told and the whatever's eyes widened in surprise. "Telly Monster! Is that you?" he asked.

"Yes," Telly said, rubbing his now aching and possibly bruised head.

"Sorry I attacked you. I thought you were one of the villains," Gonzo apologized.

"Great, first he attacks me and then he insults me," Telly muttered before he said, "No problem. I'm somewhat okay."

Then, Kermit heard familiar rude laughter and a voice said, "Well, that was the best thing that happened today!"

Kermit looked outside to see it was Oscar the Grouch laughing at what happened to Telly, and the frog was surprised to see everyone from Sesame Street and Fraggle Rock standing outside.

"What are you all doing here?" Kermit asked, surprised, throw the door wide open.

"We saw Walter on TV and we wanted to know if you were okay," Gobo stated.

"Really? Wow, that's really nice of you g-wait! You're not all here because you want to help us fight Zia, are you?" Kermit asked, shocked.

"Well, sort of," Ernie admitted.

"What! Do you know how dangerous Zia is! She's completely crazy!" Kermit shouted.

"We're not scared of some Silly Creature!" Red Fraggle exclaimed.

"Yeah, you always helped us, and now we're going to help you," Doc stated.

Kermit looked at his friends with a very surprised expression. He had no idea they wanted to help him get out of this mess! After a few moments, he nodded and said, "Well, if you guys help us. We might have a better chance of winning! Okay, you're in!"

All the Muppets cheered and started to flow into the mansion. Then, out of nowhere, there was a big explosion.

"Oh no! That has to be Zia!" Gonzo shouted.

Kermit ran through the crowd of his friends and when he emerged from the back, he was mortified to see someone had blown up the fence. There was smoke engulfing the area, so he couldn't tell who was there. Then, a frog figure entered the front yard. "Hi-lo, how is everybody feeling in LA?" a familiar voice with a Russian accent asked.

"Constantine!" Kermit yelped.

"Yes, it is I, Constantine! The world's most dangerous frog and #1 criminal!" Constantine exclaimed, scaring the Sesame Street Muppets. "And I have come all the way to America…to help you put an end to this Zia person."

"What! You want to help us! Why?" Kermit asked the evil frog, shocked.

"Because, Kermit, if Zia succeeds in her plan to destroy all of you, she'll be new #1 criminal! Do you honestly think I would stand and let her do that!" Constantine stated angrily.

"Well, now that I think about it, you do have a good excuse to be here," Kermit said, doing his befuddled face.

"Constantine! You're an expert on explosives right? We could use that talent of yours to get into Zia's other hide out," Gonzo stated.

"I would figure so. I have 100 explosives with me. I am at your service," Constantine said.

Then, Kermit heard coughing and saw someone else coming through the smoke. "Actually, Constantine, you have 99, you wasted one on the gate," a female voice with a Russian accent stated.

"Sorry," Constantine said, annoyed.

"Nadya! You're here too?" Kermit asked.

"Yes, Kermit, along with my guards and the prisoners from my Gulag," Nadya stated as the smoke cleared, revealing all the guards of the Gulag and the inmates.

"So you all want to help me? Why?" Kermit asked.

"Because, Kermit, you are our friend," Prison King stated.

"Yeah, and we saw the light and we knew you couldn't deal with a bad person like Zia on your own," Big Papa added.

"Wow, thanks you guys," Kermit said, smiling.

"Small car at 2:00!" Danny Trejo hollered, pointing down the street.

At that point, Sam the Eagle came running out of the building. "Did someone say small car?" the bird asked. Within seconds, the Le Maximum covered with some seaweed and barnacles covering it came driving into the front yard.

"Out of the way! Interpol!" Jean Pierre Napoleon shouted at the people as he drove past them and parked in front of Kermit. He got out of the car and whipped out his badge. "Jean Pierre Napoleon. Interpol agent. I came here as fast as I could when I heard about Zia plotting to eliminate all the Muppets in the world," Jean stated.

"Shawn, you do know that since Zia is in America, this is CIA jurisdiction, right?" Sam the Eagle asked his friend.

"Sam, I didn't think you'd be here. And yes, I am aware of that, but if Zia succeeds in her plan here, she'll head straight to Europe and get all the Muppets there. I came here to be sure that is prevented," Jean explained.

Kermit did his befuddled face and said, "Well, Zia did say she would if I didn't do what she said, but I don't think she meant it literally, Jean."

"You can't be too careful," Jean stated.

Then, there was the sound of another car approaching the mansion, which resulted in Fozzie saying, "Hey! That car looks familiar!"

Then, the car parked and Gary and Mary got out. "It should. You gave it to us as a wedding present," Gary said with a grin.

"Gary, Mary, what are you doing here?" Kermit asked the married couple.

"We saw Walter on TV and we started to worry about you guys. Is Walter here?" Gary asked the Muppets.

"Wherever Walter is, he's with Robin, Zoot, Zondra and all the other Offed Muppets. All we got is that they're all in a cave of some sort," Gonzo said.

Mary looked at the large group of Muppets, surprised to see so many in one place, until she had a feeling some Muppets were missing. "Why do I get the feeling some Muppets are missing," she said.

"The Electric Mayhem went off to the bridge to look for Zoot. They might be awhile so we'll have to wait for them to get here. In the meantime, let's all get inside before someone sees us. We can also discuss a plan to stop Zia and her henchmen to kill time," Kermit suggested as he ushered all the guests into the mansion.

Back at the river, Dr. Teeth and Zoot were a foot apart from one another. Floyd, Walter, Lips and Clifford were watching close up, worried about what they were about to witness. Animal and Janice were still on the bridge, watching everything from there, curious about what was going on. Finally, Dr. Teeth said, "Zoot! I'm so glad you're alive! Are you okay? What have you been doing in the last 5 years?"

Zoot didn't answer; he just frowned. Suddenly he raised his hand and slapped the keyboardist dead on the face, making Walter and Lips jump in fear. "That's for trying to kill me!" Zoot snapped, making Dr. Teeth shake in a fear a little. Then, Zoot did a little smile and said, "And this is for apologizing yesterday." Zoot then hugged Dr. Teeth, where his friend hugged him back.

Clifford laughed and said, "Wow, for a second there, I thought you were going to kill him, Zoot!"

"Hey, I'm not that crazy," Zoot said, pulling away from Dr. Teeth, still smiling. Dr. Teeth grinned, glad everything was going to be okay.

"Say, where are the rest of the Offed Muppets?" Floyd asked, looking around spotting none of them.

"Oh, they're all in the cave. I'll round them up and introduce you to them!" Walter exclaimed, running back into the cave.

Within seconds, Floyd, Dr. Teeth and Lips were greeted by a huge crowd of Muppets, most of them they didn't recognize.

Dr. Teeth could easily recognize Harry the Hipster, Zondra, Digit, Flash, Beard, Francine, and Vicki, but a few others he had to be introduced to. He also noticed Lips looked a little nervous around all the Muppets, since a lot of them he wasn't familiar with, but Floyd knew as many of the Offed Muppets as Dr. Teeth did, so he was pretty much okay.

Animal and Janice were watching the scenario play out from the bridge, and they both wanted to join in. It didn't take long for Zondra to notice them and she hollered to the two Muppets, "Hey! If you want to get down here, there's some old rock steps near the end of the bridge!"

"Thanks, Zondra!" Janice shouted back before she and Animal started to run over to the other end of the bridge, where Zondra pointed, until they both came to a sudden stop mid-run.

"Why'd they stop?" Walter asked, seeing them.

Floyd looked closely at Janice and Animal to see they both had expressions of fear, and whatever they were scared of, was hidden by some shrubs on the end of the bridge.

"Janice! What's wrong?" he shouted to his girlfriend, but she didn't respond; she just stood there in shock. Then, before anyone knew it, multiple people came running down into the area wearing black uniforms, armed with guns of all sorts and surrounded all the Offed Muppets!

"What's going on?!" Robin screamed in terror.

"We're being Shang haied!" Sam stated in surprise.

Then, Zia came walking down into the area, with a smug grin on her face. "Zia! How'd you find us!" Sam demanded to know.

"Well, it was very simple, really; I just followed him," Zia said, pointing directly at Dr. Teeth.

"WHAT!" Zoot shouted, staring at his friend.

"Zoot! It's not what you think!" Dr. Teeth tried to tell his bandmate.

"Thank you, Dr. Teeth, for leading us to the Offed Muppets. I was wondering where they were all hiding, and now I know," Zia sneered.

"Dr. Teeth, how could you!" Zoot berated his friend, grabbing him by the shoulders and shaking him.

"Zoot! I swear! I had no idea I was being followed!" Dr. Teeth argued.

"Can you wait to argue until you get locked up in my warehouse? It's interfering with me capturing you," Zia said as her henchmen started to handcuff the Muppets.

"We'll get the ones up here," one of Zia's henchmen shouted down to Zia as two others approached Animal and Janice.

Before one of them had the chance to grab Animal, the drummer shouted, "No!" Then, out of nowhere, he leapt over the railing and straight into the river.

"He's escaping!" Zia shouted.

Several of her hit men looked in the river, trying to locate the Muppets, but had no luck.

"He got away," one of them stated.

"We'll worry about him later. Let's just take these guys back to the warehouse," Zia said.

Zia and her group then escorted the Offed Muppets and the remainder of the Electric Mayhem up onto the bridge, where several vans were waiting. They forced all the Muppets in the back and after they locked everyone up in the vehicles, they drove off.

Back at the river, Robin the frog came out from hiding behind a bush. "Sometimes, being unnoticed has its advantages," he muttered to himself. He looked around the area, trying to see if anyone else had chosen to hide, but so far, he saw nobody, until Animal suddenly ran out from underneath the bridge. "Oh good, you're still here," Robin said, glad he wasn't alone. "What are we going to do? We have to tell my Uncle Kermit."

"Mansion! Mansion!" Animal shouted.

"Mansion?" Robin said, confused, until he remembered Kermit had a mansion in Hollywood.

"Is my Uncle Kermit at the mansion?" Robin asked.

"Yeah! Yeah!" Animal exclaimed.

"Well then, let's go!" Robin said as the duo ran up to the bridge and made their way back to Los Angeles.

**Uh-oh, things were going well for the Offed Muppets for a few moments until Zia showed up, claiming she followed Dr. Teeth there...which she in a sense did. And now Zoot is mad at Dr. Teeth again! **

**How will the keyboardist fix this misunderstanding?**

**What will happen to the Offed Muppets now? **

**What will the other Muppets do to save them? **

**Will Constantine have enough explosives before the plan goes into action? Find out in the next chapter of Offed!**

**Please Follow, Favorite, and/or Review!**


	12. Trying to Create a Plan

Back at Kermit's mansion, Kermit and the other Muppets were trying their best to come up with a plan to stop Zia, but it wasn't an easy to thing since they had no idea what Zia's warehouse looked like. They knew it had to be a big building, but they didn't know if there was a giant wall, electric fence or something surrounding, whether or not is was heavily guarded on the outside or inside, and where Zia was exactly.

Finally, after a few hours of confusion, Miss Piggy finally threw down her pencil and shouted, "Kermit! What's the point of making this plan if we don't even know what sort of building we're going to deal with! This is starting to get hopeless."

"Piggy, nobody said this was going to be easy," Kermit told the pig.

"I know Kermie, but this is just taking too long! For all we know, Zia might be up to something terrible," Miss Piggy explained.

"Yeah, I second that thought. Mainly because we haven't seen the band in hours. They should've been back with the Offed Muppets by now," Scooter said.

"I thought they went to just go find Zoot?" Gonzo asked.

"Yeah, but it probably wouldn't have hurt to get the other Muppets to help as well," Scooter admitted.

Then, Camilla clucked something to Gonzo, which he translated, "Camilla suggests that we should just go to the warehouse and wing it! Not a bad idea, dear."

"Camilla, how can we just go to the warehouse if we don't even know where it is? It might take days, maybe weeks. For all we know, it might not even be anywhere near LA," Kermit said.

"Maybe some of us should head out and look for it. We'll let know when we think we've found it," Gary suggested.

"I'm sorry, Gary, but that's far too dangerous. What if Zia were to see any of you? She would either lock you up somewhere or kill you!" Kermit said.

Constantine then stepped up and said, "How about I work as sort of a double agent. Maybe I can find this Zia person and tell her I want to work with her. Then, once she gullibly takes me to her warehouse, I'll send you information and try to get back here without being noticed."

"That's actually not a bad idea," Nadya agreed.

Kermit shook his head and said, "Sorry, but Zia can easily tell if someone is trying to trick her. She'll probably try to attack you before you have the chance to move forward with your plan."

"I know! How about we paint over Constantine's mole and we'll make him look like you! Zia is after you, right? So she'll just take Constantine, where he'll have a tracking device on him, we find the warehouse, stop Zia and everything will be okay!" Fozzie suggested.

"Fozzie, Zia wants to kill me!" Kermit shouted.

"And I do not want to be dead," Constantine said angrily.

"Well, it was just a thought," Fozzie said.

Then, there was a knock at the door, where everyone in the mansion froze with fear. Kermit shut off all the lights and carefully went to the door, he opened the door just a crack to see… "Kermit! Kermit!" Animal shouted as he barged into the mansion and tackled the frog to the ground.

"Animal! You're here! Where's the rest of the band?" Kermit asked his friend.

At that moment, Robin ran into the house, exclaiming, "Zia captured them all! The Electric Mayhem and the Offed Muppets, including Walter! We came here to tell you that!"

"What! Zia captured them! Oh no, that's not good," Kermit said, jumping to his feet.

At that moment, the lights turned back on and Gary and Mary ran into the entrance hall. "Zia took Walter?" Gary asked.

"Yeah! And we don't know where they are! I think she's going to kill all the Offed Muppets and the band!" Robin screamed.

"Oh dear, we have to do something now before Zia does that," Mary said.

"Kermit, what do we do?" Fozzie asked his friend. "The plan isn't even done, and by the time it is, it'll be tomorrow morning and everyone might be dead!"

"Dead!?" Boober and Telly screamed. "I'm out of here!" Boober and Telly started trying to leave until Kermit stopped them.

"Zia is probably still out there, and I bet she's working on finding the rest of us! You can't leave! It's not safe!" Kermit told them.

"He's right. We'll be doomed on our own!" Telly said.

"But we can't just stay here like sitting…sitting…what is it Silly Creatures say when they're sitting somewhere defenseless?" Boober asked.

"Sitting ducks?" Robin asked.

"Exactly! We'll be sitting ducks if we stay here!" Boober exclaimed.

"Did you work out a plan to stop Zia yet, Uncle Kermit? We have to save the Offed Muppets and the band!" Robin asked.

"We're trying to figure out a plan, Robin, but we're hitting a bunch of dead ends. Unless we had an idea of what Zia's warehouse looked like, we might come up with something quicker," Kermit told his nephew.

Robin was starting to worry that by the time his uncle came up with a plan, it'll already be too late. Then, there was another knock at the door. "I wonder who that could be?" Kermit said to himself as he answered the door for the third time that day, this time, to see Angel Marie standing on the doorstep.

"What the-Angel Marie? What are you doing here?" the frog asked the other Muppet.

"Angel Marie! He's one of Zia's cohorts!" Robin shouted.

"He worked for Zia?! Behind out backs?!" Fozzie gasped.

"Yeah, and he was the one that offed me!" Robin added.

"Kermit! Get rid of him! He might be being tracked by Zia!" Piggy screamed.

"No, our location has probably been confirmed! We have to get out of here!" Telly said, in the process of running out of the mansion through the back door with some other Muppets following close behind.

"Hold it, I'll take care of him," Nadya said, stopping the fleeing Muppets and whipping out her Taser gun. She aimed it at the monster, saying, "You have 1 minute to explain why you are here or I will deploy."

"Your Taser, Nadya! Isn't that a bit much?" Kermit asked the woman.

"No…not for me that is," Nadya stated.

"Wait, let me explain!" Angel Marie shouted, holding his hands up.

"Well hurry it up, buster, because Nadya gave you one minute to talk or she'll taze you, and if that doesn't stop you, I will personally karate chop you out of me and Kermie's mansion," Miss Piggy threatened.

"Okay, I'll explain as quickly and simply as I can; I know where the Zia's warehouse is and I have map of the entire building, plus a wall surrounding it," AM stated.

"Really? You know where it is?" Kermit asked the Muppet, but before he could an answer, Sam the Eagle walked up to the monster and asked, "How do we know we can trust you?"

"I have evidence! See?" Angel Marie then went over to the coffee table and rolled out a big sheet of paper, revealing a map of a building.

Kermit observed it, and judging by the map key, there were a lot of prison cells in it. "This doesn't look much like a warehouse, more like a prison," the frog stated.

"That's because it used to be a prison, but they shut it down for because there were a lot of prisoners and they took up too much space," AM explained. "All the Offed Muppets and your friends are all locked up in those cells. Zia is planning on killing them all tomorrow morning, so we have to work fast."

Constantine looked at the map and immediately whipped out a sheet of blue paper and a white pencil, where he sketched a replica of the map. He also added a few extra notes.

"What's that for?" Jean asked the criminal.

"It's a plan to get into the building. There is a big wall surrounding the warehouse. I plan on blowing it up, but only in a certain spot," Constantine explained to the Interpol agent and then asked the monster, "Angel Marie, was it? Where does Zia plan to kill all the Offed Muppets?"

Angel Marie observed the map for a few seconds before he pointed at a big clear area on the map.

Constantine nodded, looked at his map and made a note near the wall around that area. Kermit noticed it said, "Place bombs on this wall."

"Why do you want to put the bombs there?" the frog asked.

Constantine had this weird grin and said, "I'm planning our big entrance." Kermit was confused; why would their plan to rescue their friends need a big entrance and how big was it going to be? Kermit knew he might find out soon. "When is Zia going to kill them?" Kermit asked.

"9:00 in the morning, so we have to get to the building before then," Angel Marie stated.

"How does 8:45 sound? That'll give us enough time to prep beforehand and once we get to the wall, it'll give me enough time to set up the explosives we'll need to take out the wall," Constantine suggested.

"Sounds good," Angel Marie agreed.

"Well, now since we have a plan, we need to work on getting some stuff to use to defeat Zia," Kermit concluded.

"But wait, why are you helping us, Angel Marie?" Robin asked the monster, confused about why he was helping.

"Why do you think? Did you assume I like killing my friends? No! I don't like that sort of work! I never did! I'm just a gentle monster," AM explained.

"Well, I'm glad you decided to help us. Is Zia aware that you're here?" Kermit asked.

"No, I told her I was going to get a drink. She didn't seem bothered by it since all her henchmen seem to tell her that," Angel Marie stated.

"Good, now let's get ready to save our friends!" Robin shouted excitedly.

All the other Muppets and humans started to cheer out of joy. Tomorrow morning, they would all set out to put an end to Zia's evil doing, and they would succeed!

Meanwhile, at the warehouse, Zoot and Dr. Teeth were locked up in the same cell, where the keyboardist noticed the saxophonist was giving him a mean look.

"For the 20th time, I've told you; I didn't know Zia was following me and I am **not** working with her! Besides, I'm locked up too!" he snapped.

"But still, you didn't stop to check if anyone was following you. Now we're all going to die because of you!" Zoot shouted.

Dr. Teeth sighed, rubbing his forehead from the tension in the cell. "Look, I'm sorry I wasn't careful. If I had known Zia was tracking me, I would've gone somewhere to throw her off," he said. "I never meant for us to get captured."

"Sorry isn't going to cut it this time, Teeth," Zoot sneered at his bandmate.

"Well then what should I do to get you to forgive me?" Dr. Teeth asked the Muppet.

Zoot looked away from him and muttered, "I don't know."

"Zoot! Will you quit being so stubborn! I'm trying to be your friend again!" Teeth snapped.

"I'll quit being stubborn when you stop getting me into trouble! You threw me into a river in a wooden crate, you jumped into a river where I had to go in to save you, risking my own life, and now you got me locked up in jail with you!" Zoot shouted.

"Will you two just shut up!" Zoot and Dr. Teeth heard Zondra scream. "You men are too loud!"

"Zondra, please be nice. They're just having a little argument," the duo heard Walter say.

"If it's a little argument, then how come I can hear them!" Zondra sneered.

"Because we're right next door to them," Walter stated. Zondra just scoffed and kept quiet.

"Now, what was I saying? Oh yeah, I was going on a rant about how much trouble you get me into!" Zoot continued.

"Zoot, please! Can you pipe down a little, someone will hear you," Dr. Teeth said, trying to calm down his friend.

"I won't pipe down until I'm done yelling at you!" Zoot snarled.

"You know, ever since I figured out you loved me, I thought you would've been a little bit more forgiving of all the trouble I caused for you," Dr. Teeth said, sounding a little ticked.

Zoot then muttered, "You said you loved me too…but you didn't do much when we saw each other again by the river."

Dr. Teeth's eye's widened in surprise when he heard the saxophonist say that. It was true they just hugged at the river, but that was because he assumed Zoot would've been embarrassed in front of Lips, Zoot, Walter and Clifford if he…_did something else_. Dr. Teeth then got an idea. "So, that's what you're also upset about?" he asked.

"What?" Zoot asked, looking at his bandmate, who was stepping closer to him. "What are you doing?" he asked, starting to get a little nervous.

Dr. Teeth stood in front of Zoot, where he grinned and said, "I think I figured out what it'll take to get you to forgive."

Zoot rolled his eyes and looked up at his friend, and asked, "Oh really? What?"

Then, before Zoot knew it, Dr. Teeth leaned forward and pressed his lips to his in a small kiss. Zoot squeaked in surprise and his eyes widened in surprise; even if this was the last thing he'd expected, he couldn't deny it was something he'd once yearned for before. After the initial shock from the kiss had passed, Zoot closed his eyes shut and made an attempt to return the other Muppet's advance, both slightly nervous and very excited, for this was the first time his lips had ever come to contact with anyone else's.

Dr. Teeth was taken back on feeling the return, but it also ignited a passion inside, which made him emit a small moan of approval against the other's lips and continue to deepen the kiss. Finally, after a few moments, they separated and looked into each other's eyes, both of them breathing heavily.

Zoot did a small smile and said, "Okay…I forgive you."

Dr. Teeth smirked at the saxophonist before he started to move in for another kiss, which Zoot allowed. And for most of the night, they kissed…and kissed…and kissed.

**Well, Robin and Animal got to the mansion and told everyone the bad news, and just when they thought all hope of creating a plan to rescue the Offed Muppets and the Electric Mayhem, Angel Marie shows up with a map and decides to help them, and what better way to end this chapter than with a sweet kiss between my new favorite pairing?**

**Will the Muppets' plan to save everyone work?**

**Is Zia really going to be defeated?**

**How far will Dr. Teeth and Zoot's relationship escalate? Find out in the next chapter of Offed-The Rescue!**

**Please Follow, Favorite, and/or Review!**


	13. The Rescue

The next morning, the Muppets all prepped for their plan to rescue all the other Muppets. Kermit was making a list of everything so that once the battle was over, they would check to be sure they had everything before they left.

At one point, he looked around the room and asked, "Hey, has anyone seen Piggy?"

"She went upstairs earlier. Said she has to look good for the fight," Nadya stated.

At that moment, Kermit heard Piggy holler, "Right here!"

Kermit turned around, surprised by Piggy's choice of dress. She wore a pink, sleeveless turtleneck shirt, purple and lavender camouflage pants, a black headband tied around her head and a black belt. She also had black fingerless gloves and combat boots.

"Wow, you look like a cross between Rambo and Lara Croft," Scooter commented.

"I was trying to go for just Lara croft, but moi thought a headband would look nice too," Piggy said.

"Wow, you look really cool, Miss Piggy," Zoe complimented.

"Thank you, dear," Piggy said, smiling.

"Well, are we all ready now?" Kermit asked his friends.

"YEAH!" they all shouted.

"Okay then, let's go!" Kermit commanded.

All the Muppets cheered as they exited from the mansion. The Sesame Street Muppets got on a bus they took to get to Kermit's mansion, Doc, Sprocket and the Fraggles got into the car they took, Gary and Mary got into their vehicle, Nadya had the prisoners and other guards sitting the truck she took, with her driving and Constantine riding shotgun, Jean Pierre Napoleon got into his little car, and the Muppet Show Muppets got into the Electric Mayhem bus.

"We're coming for you, Walter, Zondra, Zoot, Clifford, Sam, Dr. Teeth, Floyd, Lips, Janice and…the rest of you!" Robin hollered out the window.

"Rescue! Rescue!" Animal hollered as the vehicles all drove off to Zia's warehouse to save their friends.

Meanwhile, at the warehouse, Walter was staring out the window, wondering what all the other Muppets were doing. Animal had escaped, so he could only assume the drummer had run to get help for them. And one of the other henchmen mentioned Robin the Frog was missing, so he was probably getting help too. He knew that all the Offed Muppets and the Electric Mayhem were set to be killed later that morning, in about half an hour or so. He hoped his friends would save everyone soon, before it was too late.

"Walter, will you quit doing that? Let's face it; they're not going to come for us. They're too cowardly," Zondra told the Muppet.

"Come on, Zondra. At least have a little faith in them. I mean, they're out friends. They couldn't let us die like this. I know the Muppets will rescue us," Walter stated.

Zondra sighed and said, "Well, if they do save us, don't expect me to stick around. That group is full of men, rats and bears."

"What's wrong with them? Fozzie is a pretty good guy, Bobo is nice too, Rizzo and his rat friends are pretty fun, and all the guys are good people," Walter stated.

"Sure," Zondra said, not quite believing him. Walter thought to himself for a few moments before he realized something; in one of the episodes of Muppets Tonight, Zondra, when she disguised as Darci, wrote a lot of anti-men, anti-bear and anti-rat songs, but he had no idea why. There has to be some background to that hatred, and he wanted to know what.

He sat across from Zondra and asked the girl, "You know, in Muppets Tonight, you wrote a lot of anti-men, anti-bear and anti-rat songs. Do you think you can tell me why?"

"Why do you want to know?" Zondra asked, slightly annoyed.

"Well, it's not like you can't hate them for no reason. There has got to be something that made you have such a big dislike to them. Come on, you can tell me," Walter said.

Zondra sighed and said, "You really want to know? Fine, I'll tell you. Here's the reason why I hate men; when I was three, my mother died, and when she did, my brothers thought that meant they could pick on me whenever they wanted, and they did. My father wasn't that good to me either. Sometimes, their abuse got so bad, I actually got hurt, on the outside and the inside. When I was 10, I called the cops and told them I was being abused by my father and my brothers, but when Child Services came, my father told them I had made the whole thing up and my brothers acted so nice to me while they were there, that I knew it was fake. After they left, they all gave me the worse beating of my life in my room and left me there, all bloody and bruised…"

"I get it, since your father and brothers treated you so badly, you assumed all men are like that, and when your dad lied to Child Services, you must've thought all men were liars too, right?" Walter guessed.

"Exactly," Zondra confirmed.

"Well, I can assure you, Zondra, not all guys are like that. A lot of them are very nice and honest, like me, Kermit, my brother Gary, there's a lot more good guys then bad ones," Walter told the girl.

Zondra stayed silent, as if thinking over what Walter said, before going on with her story, "Now for the reason why I hate rats; whenever my father assumed I behaved too badly, he used to lock me up in the cellar, and guess what was in there?" Walter was about to answer until Zondra shouted, "Rats! Big, disgusting, black rats! They used to try to climb onto me, and some even bit me! I'm lucky to not have gotten sick from them!"

"Okay, that actually makes sense about why you hate rats. But Rizzo and his friends are not like those other rats. They're nice and fun to be around, and they never bite anything except food. They're really cool if you give them a chance. Now, tell me why you hate bears," Walter said.

"Well, I hate bears because my father had a thing for hunting them. He hunted bears, had them stuffed, and put them into his den. So whenever I see a bear of any sort, it reminds me of my father's hobby, which makes me hate them. I even disliked teddy bears!" Zondra explained. Walter could sense intense sorrow from her tone of voice.

"Well, Zondra, I can see that you hate bears because of your father and that they terrified you, but that doesn't mean you have to hate bears like Bobo and Fozzie, because of that," he said. "And another thing, Fozzie and Bobo are actually living bears, not stuffed statues. Your past is a pretty bad one. I'm sorry you had to go through that."

Zondra sighed and said, "Don't worry about it, it's not your fault. It's mine. I let my father and brothers' abuse get to me and make me hate men, bears and rats. Sometimes...I used to wonder why they did that to me. What did I do wrong?"

"I don't think you did anything wrong Zondra. I think they were just being jerks," Walter assumed.

"Yeah, I guess there were…you know, Walter, you're right. Just because my family treated me badly, or I was locked in a room with an infinite number of rats, and my father's hobby was hunting bears doesn't mean I have to hate every single man, rat, or bear I see. I should've given them a chance, like you said…thanks for helping me sort out my problem in my final moments of life," Zondra said, smiling at the Muppet.

Walter smiled too and the duo just sat there in the cell, smiling at each other, until there was a loud cry.

"Waaah! Zondra, I never knew that sort of stuff happened to you!" Walter heard Spamela Hamderson cry.

"Yeah, now I know why you had something against me, Bill, Bobo and Rizzo!" Clifford added.

"You should've talked to us about this earlier. We could've helped recover from your bad past," Digit added.

"I couldn't agree more," Vicki added.

"Zondra! You didn't hate me and Chip, too, did you?" Ubu asked.

Zondra peered out the small window in the door of her and Walter's cell and said, "Well, you did get under my skin a few times, but you didn't bug me enough to hate you."

"Oh that's good," Chip said from his and Ubu's cell.

In Dr. Teeth and Zoot's cell, the two musicians were lying on the floor, very close to each other, sleeping. After a few moments of commotion in the cells, the two Muppets woke up and observed their surroundings, until their eyes met. The two lovers smiled at each other for a few seconds before they kissed for a few seconds. When they parted, they kept smiling at each other. But the moment didn't last long because there was the rattling of keys from the other side of their cell door, meaning someone was about to come in.

Dr. Teeth quickly got to his feet and helped Zoot stand up, where the saxophonist hid behind him. Finally, one of Zia's henchmen entered the cell with a smug grin on his face, where he said, "Time for your execution, Muppets."

The man slapped handcuffs of some sort onto Zoot and Dr. Teeth's wrists, and dragged them out of the cell. The two Muppets noticed the same thing was happening to all the other Muppets; they were being handcuffed and taken away. The henchmen took all the Muppets outside to the large clear area where they intended to kill them. They gathered all the Offed Muppets in the clearing and ran back, where some more goons showed up, armed with machine guns aimed at the large group. Zia walked outside from the warehouse and stood behind her people, smiling sincerely.

"Well, Sam, looks like all hope is lost for you and your friends," she sneered.

"Don't assume things like that too quickly, Zia! Kermit and the others will be here soon to rescue us!" Sam shouted at the woman.

"Really? Then why aren't they here already?" Zia asked.

Everyone started to murmur amongst themselves for a few moments until Walter said, "Maybe they're running late?"

"No, Walter, I'm afraid that's not it. I think that they've forgotten about you, or they don't care about any of you anymore, or perhaps they are all too cowardly to come here and stop me. Besides, once I'm done with all of you, I'll set out and kill them all next," Zia stated.

"I don't think so, Zia. We're Kermit's friends. We're like family to him!" Dr. Teeth stated.

"Family? Did you just say you Muppets are all one big family? There's no such thing as family among freaks like you. You're all just a bunch of outcasts that joined together to make entertain people," Zia sneered.

"Not just to entertain people, Zia, but to make people happy," Sam corrected the woman.

Zia scowled at the Muppet before saying to her henchmen, "On the count of one, two, three, fire, shoot them to death. One…"

"We're done for," Clifford muttered.

"Don't give up hope, Clifford, Kermit will come get us. I know it," Lips told the Rastafarian, who looked at him quizzically.

"Two…" Zia said.

"Zoot, just so you know, no matter what happens, I will always love you," Dr. Teeth whispered to the saxophonist, who replied, "I love you too, Dr. Teeth."

"Three…" Zia said.

"Come on, Kermit! Where are you!" Walter hollered at the top of his lungs.

"Face it, Walter, he's not going to get here in time! He probably doesn't even know where we even are," Zondra said.

"Fire!" Zia shouted. The henchmen got their guns into position, about to pull the trigger and shoot the Muppets.

Suddenly, the wall behind the Muppets exploded! Everyone jumped in fear, some clinging to people close to them, some running away.

"What was that!" Zia shouted.

"What? You haven't seen explosives before?" a familiar voice sneered with a Russian accent.

Walter froze upon hearing that voice, knowing who it belonged to very well. The Muppet turned around to see the smoke starting to clear a little, revealing Constantine standing in the huge hole he created with his bombs.

"It's Constantine! The world's most dangerous frog!" one of Zia's henchmen exclaimed in fear.

"Constantine, what are you doing here?" Zia questioned the frog.

"Just trying to keep my status as #1 criminal in the world. And some friends of these people wanted to come here and needed a way to get in," Constantine explained.

"What!" Zia shouted.

Then, the rest of the smoke cleared, revealing all the other Muppets and the humans. Walter gasped at the sight of so many Muppets and all the people that had come to help them. He had forgotten that there were a lot of Muppets in the world and was very impressed by the large army. Then, he saw some familiar faces.

"Gary! Mary! What are you doing?" the Muppet asked excitedly.

"We came to help you," Gary stating, smiling.

"Okay guys, let's go!" Kermit shouted, before the group started to charge into the area outside the warehouse.

Several of Zia's henchmen started to flee, frightened by the big number of Muppets, while Zia went after them shouting, "Don't run! They're just a bunch of Muppets! They're nothing compared to you! Come back here and fight them! Don't leave!"

As Zia rounded her thugs back up, Piggy began karate chopping all of the handcuffs off of the Offed Muppets and Electric Mayhem.

"It's so great to see you guys!" Walter exclaimed.

"Yeah, it's great to see you all too!" Gonzo said.

"Say Sam, what say we show Zia that we're not afraid of her henchmen?" Kermit asked his old friend.

Sam smiled and nodded, saying, "Excellent idea! Muppets, charge over to Zia's army! Attack!"

The Muppets started to run at the Zia's hit men, all of them screaming like barbarians.

Zia gathered her people and shouted, pointing at the Muppets, "Counter-attack!" The henchmen started to run at the Muppets, armed with metal bats and small blades.

"Counter-counter-attack!" Fozzie hollered.

"Fozzie, this is not the time for humor from other movies!" Kermit shouted at his friend. Within seconds, the two groups collided and started to fight. The battle of Muppets versus Zia's team had begun!

**Okay, this chapter was a bit rushed somewhere in the middle, but all in all it was pretty good. Plus, we learned a bit of Zondra's past just to save space. I'm not sure if her telling Walter this will be relevant in the story yet. **

**Will the Muppets win in the fight against Zia?**

**Or will the evil woman be victorious? Find out in the next chapter of Offed-The Big Fight!**

**Please Follow, Favorite, and/or Review!**


	14. The Big Fight

The outside of the warehouse was now filled with Muppets and humans, who were thoroughly beating the enemy silly. Several miniature helicopters that were built by Doc and Sprocket were dropping water balloons and shooting water out of small water cannons at the goons.

Up in the sky, several chickens were flying above, clucking out "Ride of the Valkyries."

"Fly my pretties, fly!" Gonzo commanded from down below. "Now fire down below!"

Before any of Zia's army knew it, the chickens toward the evil party and the men were being hit by a barrage of egg bombs. A few of them nearly got the other Muppets.

"Hey, chickens! Watch what you're doing!" Zondra shouted at the birds, "You almost got me!"

Walter was running through the crowd, trying to figure out what to do, until he noticed Wilkins was just standing where he was, not doing anything. Walter also noticed he still had the sedative collar on him, meaning he was still kept under control. Then, the boy got an idea. He ran over to the Offed Muppet and clicked the button, making it turn off. Wilkin's tired eyes become wide open and crazy once again.

Icky Gunk, seeing this, shouted frantically, "Walter! What are you doing!?"

"I have an idea!" Walter hollered back.

"Say! I remember you! You're that guy that hates Wilkins coffee!" the Wilkins snapped.

"Actually Wilkins, I tried some of your coffee, and I was wrong to say all that bad stuff. It tastes great!" Walter lied.

"Really? Well, that's great!" Wilkins exclaimed.

"But you know who really hates your coffee?" Walter asked.

Wilkins froze and questioned in a really creepy tone, "Who?"

Walter pointed at Zia's henchmen and said, "See those people in the black uniforms and metal bats and knives? They all hate Wilkins coffee!"

Wilkins gasped in shock and shouted, "I'll take care of them!"

Within seconds, Wilkins ran at a group of henchmen, where one of the henchmen asked, "Who's the runt?"

"I am Wilkins!" Wilkins screamed at the top of his lungs.

Clifford, seeing the Muppet was free from his sedative collar, shouted to the other Muppets, "You might want to cover the kids' eyes. This could get ugly!"

All the older Muppets did as told and covered most of the Sesame Street characters' eyes and Kermit covered Robin's eyes. Then, Wilkins proceeded to beat the leaving heck out of them and throw them around the area, making a bunch of the other Muppets and human drop their jaws in shock and horror as Wilkins beat them all up so easily. When he stopped, he stood on a pile of unconscious, badly beaten and bruised henchmen, breathing heavily.

"Whoa," Zondra said. "Never knew he was that crazy."

"And I never knew there would be someone crazier than Animal!" Floyd added.

After the Muppets uncovered the kids' eyes, they proceeded to fight all the bad guys. At one point, Robin was leading Elmo, Zoe, and a bunch of other younger Muppets armed with Super Soakers until they were confronted by this huge thug. Robin yelped and shot water in the man's face, but the man just glared at them before shouting, "You're done for!"

The kids started to tremble in fear until Sweetums ran up, brandishing a huge club and hit the man on the side, sending him flying into a wall. "Leave those kids alone!" the monster shouted.

"Yeah Sweetums!" Robin and the other kids cheered.

At one point, Miss Piggy encountered another henchmen, who she karate-chopped away from her, sending him straight at Skeeter. "Skeeter! Watch out!" the pig warned her friend.

Skeeter looked in the direction the man was coming at her and reacted quickly by kicking him back towards Piggy. "He's coming right back at you!" she shouted.

Miss Piggy karate chopped the man back at Skeeter, who kicked him back towards Piggy, who chopped him back to Skeeter, who kicked him again. This went on for a while until Miss Piggy and Skeeter both karate chopped and kicked the man straight into a wall.

"That's what you get if you mess with us!" Piggy shouted before heading somewhere else on the battlefield.

Somewhere else on the battlefield, Oscar the Grouch, wearing a metal army hat, was standing with Telly right near a set of catapults.

"5 tossed salads, Private Telly!" Oscar commanded.

"Yes sir, Commando Grouch!" Telly obliged as he yanked a rope that launched several servings of salad and the goons.

One of them snapped, "Enough with this nonsense! Isn't there a real fighter here!"

Suddenly, Constantine showed up saying, "You called?" Then, the criminal frog started using his karate skills to beat up all the henchmen within seconds. "Pathetic," the Russian frog sneered as he walked away.

Telly, shaking with fear, said, "Constantine is scary."

"Yeah, I think we'll get along just fine," Oscar added, making Telly look at him, mortified.

"I'll get those punks for this," one of the thugs muttered, getting to his feet and about to go after Oscar and Telly when Grover, dressed as Super Grover, got in his way. "You will not harm these Muppets!" he proclaimed. "I, Super Grover, will defeat you with ridiculous ease!"

"And how are you supposed to do that?" the henchman sneered.

"By the most surefire way of defeating villains there is: hopping up and down and saying 'Wubba wubba' because it sounds so nice to say," Super Grover explained before hopping around in circles going, "WUBBA, WUBBA, WUBBA, WUBBA, WUBBA, WUBBA, WUBBA, WUBBA!" He was apparently convinced beyond doubt that this ploy would work.

The goon laughed sadistically and said, "Killing you will be a blast."

Then, out of nowhere, Crazy Harry popped up and asked, "Did somebody say blast?!" before he pressed down his plunger without warning and sent the bad guy flying into the air and crashing into part of the wall.

On another part of the fight, Zondra had a weapon that could take out a whole bunch of Zia's henchmen. "Okay, Ubu, Chip, round up as many of those bad guys as you can!" she ordered.

"Yes, mam!" Ubu exclaimed saluting the woman before he and Chip ran off.

They eventually came across a big crowd of thugs, trying to corner some of the Muppets, until the duo threw some pieces of the wall and threw them at the men. The goons immediately turned their attention to the two members of Gorilla Television and started to go after them. Finally, the two Offed Muppets led them straight to Zondra's weapon; a giant cannon that seemed to be the mother of all cannons.

Walter saw the cannon too and shouted, "Zondra, you can't be serious! That thing could destroy half of the yard!"

"I know!" Zondra hollered, grinning crazily.

The henchmen started to tremble with fear as Zondra lit the fuse. They wanted to run, but they were too terrified to do so. And even worse, the fuse was pretty short! They actually started to fall to their knees and beg for their lives, a majority of them crying! Zondra just giggled as the fuse burned closer and closer to the end. It didn't take long for the other Muppets and humans to notice what was going on and to stop what they were doing to see what was about to occur.

"Is she serious!"

"Oh my gosh! That'll get them all in one hit!"

"Is she crazy!?"

"Should we stop her?!"

"Quick! Cover the children's eyes!"

"This fight just keeps getting better and better!"

Then, the fuse was finally done burning, making everyone hold their breath, ready to scream. There was a long silence until finally, something inside the cannon clicked, meaning something was about to come out, and shooting out of the cannon was…a small flag that read BANG.

All the henchmen collapsed to the ground, passing out from shock, leaving all the Muppets and good humans, staring at what happened, wide-eyed and their jaws dropped open.

Zondra, hitting her fist on the side of the cannon, was practically laughing her head off. "Oh wow! That was bloody brilliant! That was rich! I knew they were going to do that!" she shouted.

"Zondra…are you okay?" Walter asked the girl.

Zondra stopped laughing and said in her normal tone, "Yeah, I'm fine, thanks."

Walter bit his lip, shaking his head, doubting her statement.

A bunch of others looked at the girl, a little annoyed by her little joke too, save for a few of the younger Muppets who didn't understand what happened and people like, Oscar, Crazy Harry, Constantine and the other Gulag prisoners, who were all laughing.

"I like the way that girl thinks!" Big Papa stated.

"Yes, she'd make a great villainess," Constantine agreed.

"Yeah, she's mean. I like that," Oscar added.

"You would think that, wouldn't you?" Kermit said, shaking his head in disapproval at his friends. "Now come on! I think we got them all! We have to find Zia!"

All the Muppets flooded into the warehouse, all splitting up into smaller groups to look for Zia.

"Now everyone, be careful! She could be armed with a gun or weapon of some sort! Just locate her without confronting her! Leave the confronting to the people with experience!" Nadya ordered the Muppets.

"Got it!" all the Muppets replied before running off in their groups in different directions.

The Fraggles traveled through the ventilation system, hoping to locate Zia in different rooms from the vents, but so far, no luck for them. A bunch of other groups went to the prison cell, thinking Zia was hiding in one of the small rooms.

Lips and Clifford decided to go as a duo, searching some other rooms. "Dang, for a human, she's pretty good at hiding," the Rastafarian stated.

"I'll say," Lips agreed. He had no idea why he wanted to team up with Clifford, he just felt like he wanted to. But he originally intended to team up with Animal, Floyd and Janice, but Clifford ran up to him and asked him if they wanted to be partners, and Lips mindlessly said okay. He had no clue what was making him want to be closer to Clifford. Lips also noticed he started feeling the way he did around Clifford after the Muppet saved him from the river. He was confused until he remembered something Skeeter said a few days ago: "Hey Lips, have you ever considered that girls aren't your thing?" she asked.

He remembered he said, "What do you mean?"

"I mean, like, maybe you'd be much happier with a guy than a girl," she had explained.

"No, I don't think I'm like that."

"Well, at least think about for a while, and then, maybe you'll find that the one for you is a guy," she said.

Now Lips had a feeling Skeeter was right after all; maybe he would be happier with a guy, and maybe that guy was Clifford. "So, Clifford, why did you want me to team up with you? I thought you were Pepe and Rizzo's closest friend?" Lips asked, curious.

"Well, Pepe wanted to hang around Spamela Hamderson; he had a thing for her in the past and I think he still does, and Rizzo and his rat buddies wanted to work together, so I was left alone until I thought of you," Clifford explained.

"Me? Why me?" Lips asked.

Clifford smirked at the trumpeter and said, "Cause I think you're cool."

"I see," Lips said, turning away from Clifford just so he could blush. Yep, he was definitely crushing in Clifford!

Then, there was the sound of clicking heels from down a hall. "Someone's coming!" Clifford shouted softly, before grabbing Lips and the duo hid behind a stack of conveniently placed crates. Then, the figure walked into the room.

"Is it Zia?" Lips asked a little too loudly.

"Yeah, it is! Now quiet!" Clifford hissed.

"I was just-," Lips said, until Clifford hushed, "SHH!" before he suddenly grabbed the trumpeter, held him close to his body and covered his mouth with his hand.

Lips squeaked in surprise and started to freak out. He was so close to Clifford at that moment, and it felt very odd! He was actually trying to hold back from screaming with embarrassment. Zia took a simple look around, checking to be sure nobody else was around, before she started to leave, but she stopped; she could've sworn she heard a small squeak coming from somewhere. She looked around the room a second, trying to figure out where the noise was coming from until she took notice of the crates in the room.

She then heard a long squeak, as if someone was trying to hold back from screaming, followed by someone whispering, "Will you stop squeaking! I think she can hear you!"

Zia smirked sinisterly before whipping out a small knock out grenade, which she flung over the crates and left the room. Clifford and Lips glanced down at the device, until they both realized that is was a grenade! But before they could get away, the small explosive went off, sending them and the crates flying into the air before crashing into the ground.

Clifford and Lips were now unconscious, and Rastafarian was still holding onto the trumpeter.

**Yeah, I'm sort of planning a little bit of another pairing here. And can you see some of the references of past Muppet skits in this chapter, preferably regarding the Sesame Street characters?**

**What will happen to the Muppets next? **

**Will they capture Zia or will the evil woman escape before they have the chance? **

**Who will she hurt next? Find out in the next chapter of Offed-Stopping Zia.**

**Please Follow, Favorite, and/or Review!**


	15. Stopping Zia Once and for All!

Somewhere else in the warehouse, Kermit shouted, "Did anyone else hear that loud explosion?!"

"Yeah, it came from somewhere upstairs!" Fozzie stated.

"Well, what are we waiting for? Let's go!" Zondra shouted.

The big group of Muppets made their way upstairs, trying to locate Zia, until they made it to the roof of the building, where Zia was making her way to a helicopter.

"Zia! Stop! There's no point in running anymore! You're under arrest!" Sam the Eagle shouted, holding up his CIA badge.

"Sorry, but I have no interest in prison. Another time perhaps?" she asked, before climbing into her transport and started to fly away.

"She's getting away! Quick, everyone, Muppet ladder!" Kermit shouted. The frog, Walter, and Sam [of Sam & Friends, just in case there was any confusion] grabbed onto the landing skids, followed by Fozzie, Zondra and Harry the hipster to grab onto the legs of each of those three, then Gonzo, Zoot and Icky Gunk, then Miss Piggy, Dr. Teeth and Yorick, and so on.

The Muppet Ladder was starting to get pretty long, and Zia was still pretty much flying away still with them all latched to the helicopter. "We need more people! Skeeter! Run inside and round up all the humans! That could add some more weight!" Kermit hollered to the Muppets down below.

"Right!" Skeeter replied, before running back inside the warehouse. The girl located a PA system, where she turned it on and shouted into the microphone, "Everyone! Report to the roof immediately! We've found Zia, and we need help stopping her! I repeat, report to the roof immediately!"

All the other humans heard her message and dashed up the stairs, trying to get to the roof as fast as they could to help their friends. In the room Lips and Clifford were in, Lips became conscious due to the PA system, where he found himself in Clifford's arms, which caused him to yelp and squirm away from the Rastafarian. Lips looked at him until he realized the Muppet was still unconscious. The trumpeter shook his shoulders gently, saying, "Clifford! Cliff! Wake up!"

Clifford just grunted and stayed down.

"Well, at least he's alive," Lips muttered before he ran out of the room to search for the other Muppets.

Up on the roof, all the Muppets and humans were working to get Zia to land her helicopter. The Muppet Ladder was now firm on the ground, with Snuffy, Thog, and Splurge at the bottom.

"This is insane! How can it take so many Muppets and people to stop one helicopter!?" Zondra shouted, looking at how long the ladders were. The ladders were so long, that if they were any longer, it might be as tall as the warehouse!

"I'll say! It's so insane, it's almost ridiculous!" Piggy agreed.

"I'm surprised we've been suspended in the air this long and nobody freaked out about the height yet," Gonzo commented.

"Don't mention the height!" Telly shouted, who had his eyes shut.

Finally there was a slight tug at everyone's arms and legs. "I think we stopped the helicopter!" Kermit exclaimed, resulting in the other Muppets cheering.

In the helicopter, Zia noticed her transport wasn't moving and she was confused about what happened until she glanced out the window to see Kermit, Sam, and Walter latched onto the landing skids, followed by a long Muppet/human ladder that went as far down to the roof of the warehouse.

"Muppets!" she screamed, frustrated.

"Kermit, Zia's getting mad!" Walter warned the frog.

"Yeah, I can tell my looking at her face!" Kermit yelped.

Zia threw open the helicopter door, pulling out a gun, and aimed it at the Kermit. "You have three seconds to let go or I'll shoot," she threatened.

"But if we let go, we'll all die!" Fozzie stated frantically.

"I think that was her intention Fozzie," Harry the Hipster said.

"But if we keep holding on, she'll shoot us and we'll still die!" Zondra added.

At that moment, Nadya pulled out her Taser with one of her hands and threw it up towards Zondra. "Zondra!" she shouted.

Zondra looked down and saw the weapon coming towards her, where she released on of Walter's legs and caught it.

"One…two…three!" Zia shouted, about to fire the gun, until Zondra aimed the Taser at the woman and pulled the trigger, which sent two wires that attached to Zia's shoulder, electrocuting the woman into unconsciousness. The woman collapsed inside the helicopter.

"Good job, Zondra!" Walter cheered for his friend, who just smiled.

"Um guys…since the helicopter no longer has a pilot…doesn't that mean it's out of control now!" Piggy screamed.

"Gosh darn it you're right!" Kermit shouted.

"But who knows how to fly a helicopter?" Sam asked.

Walter thought to himself for a few moments before he got an idea. "Zondra! I need you to release my legs and grab Fozzie's right elbow and Harry's left elbow!" he ordered.

"What! Why?" Zondra asked.

"Just trust me!" Walter hollered.

Zondra reluctantly nodded and let go of his left leg, where she grabbed Harry's elbow, and then his right leg, where she quickly grabbed Fozzie's elbow. Walter climbed into the helicopter and stood in front of the controls. He hollered down the ladder, "Hey Mary!"

"What is it?" Mary asked.

"Do you know how to land a helicopter?" Walter asked his friend.

Mary thought for a few seconds before she shouted, "Yeah! I do! First, descend to about 900 feet above ground level approximately 2 miles from your landing zone, and lower the collective lever slightly to set up a descent. Pull back on the cyclic stick to decrease forward speed."

"What if we're not 2 miles from the landing zone?" Walter asked.

"Then coordinate both the collective lever and cyclic stick for a constant descent and decrease in ground speed. Your goal is to stop the helicopter with zero forward speed and zero descent at approximately 3 feet above ground level," Mary stated.

Walter nodded and looked at the controls until he poked his head out of the helicopter and hollered back to Mary, "There are 5 levers in here! Which one's which?"

"5 levers! What kind of helicopter is that?" Mary asked.

"A very advanced one!" Fozzie said, stating the obvious.

"Yeah, we all kind of figured that!" Zondra shouted.

Kermit thought to himself for a few moments before he shouted, "Walter! Check if there's an autopilot in there!"

Walter took a look around the helicopter until he saw a green button that read Autopilot. "Aha!" he exclaimed, pressing the button.

Within seconds, the helicopter hovered horizontally over the warehouse and started to lower back onto the roof of the building. "Can we get down now?" Nadya asked the Muppets. As the helicopter descended to the ground, the humans and Muppets released their person above them and landed safely on the ground and cleared the area.

Finally, Kermit and Sam were the last to let go, where they landed on the roof and ran away so they could avoid getting crushed by the copter. When the propellers stopped rotating and the engine shut off, Walter jumped out and rejoined his friends, who all started talking excitedly amongst themselves.

"Wow! That was awesome!"

"And fun!"

"What an action sequence!"

"That was incredible!"

"Good job, Walter!" Finally, Walter whistled, signaling everyone to be quiet. "Well, now since Zia is stopped, I suppose we should call the police and get them to lock her up," he said.

"Yes, and all will become well in the world once again," Gobo added.

A while later, the police arrived at the warehouse where they were in the process of waking Zia up so they could arrest her, and rounding up all her henchmen to be locked up as well.

Kermit gathered all the Muppets around him and said, "Listen, I'm sorry that I hid that terrible secret from you all. I hope you'll all forgive me."

"It's okay Kermit; we know Zia was forcing you to do it. We know you all cared about us," Fozzie said.

"Yeah Kermit, Zia was behind everything, not you," Sam added.

"Thanks guys. Now I just have one more thing to ask," Kermit said. The frog looked at the Offed Muppets and shouted, "Sam & Friends Muppets, Jim Henson Hour Muppets, Muppets Tonight Muppets! How would all of you like to reclaim your spots in the Muppets?"

Upon him saying that, all the Offed Muppets starting to cheer, glad they were all back together.

Then, Rizzo looked at the group of the Offed Muppets and asked, "Hey! Where's Clifford?"

At that moment, the Rastafarian Muppet ran out of the warehouse, looking around frantically, until he spotted the other Muppets. "Hey, any of you guys seen Lips! I fell unconscious some time ago and when I woke up, I couldn't find him anywhere!"

"I'm over Clifford," Lips said, walking up to his friend.

"Oh good, you're alright. When you disappeared, I thought something bad happened to you, like Zia abducted you or something…man, don't ever do that again!" Clifford explained.

"You were worried about me?" Lips asked, surprised.

"Well yeah! I have a right to worry about you! And again, don't vanish like that again," Clifford stated.

"Okay, I won't do that again," Lips said, smiling. Skeeter watched the duo and smiled, having a good feeling from their relationship.

Scooter noticed his sister grin and asked, "What's with the smile? You look like you're up to something."

"Scooter, you nerd; what I was up to just happened," Skeeter stated.

"Pardon?" Scooter said, confused.

"I'll tell you later," Skeeter said, before grabbing her brother around the neck and ruffling his hair playfully.

"Skeeter! Stop that!" Scooter protested, but he was laughing.

"I bet Jim will be very happy that you're all together again," Gordon said.

"Jim? Who's Jim?" Walter asked, curious.

"I was just about to ask the same thing," Gary said.

"You don't know who Jim is? Walter, you've been in the Muppets how long and you never knew? Jim as in Jim Henson was the man that brought all the Muppets together!" Fozzie stated.

"Really? Wow, incredible!" Walter exclaimed, amazed.

"Yeah, he got me and my friends our show, _Sam & Friends_, he started Sesame Street, got Rowlf famous on the _Jimmy Dean Show_, created the Muppet Show, created Fraggle Rock, a bunch of Muppet movies, and Jim Henson Hour, not to mention created Muppet Vision 3D!" Sam stated.

"Wow, I feel like I'm being judged for not knowing him," Walter said, embarrassed.

"Don't worry Walter, all of the new Muppets ask that whenever we first mention Jim Henson. We'll forgive you…as long as you don't ask who Frank Oz is," Miss Piggy said.

Walter then asked, "Who's Frank Oz?"

Piggy glared at Walter before saying to the other Muppets, "I tried to warn him" and suddenly karate chopping the boy into Zondra.

"Sorry," Walter groaned as he got to his feet and helped Zondra stand up.

"No problem," Zondra replied. "Was bound to happen eventually."

While all the Muppets were all talking amongst themselves, Zia was being escorted to a police cruiser, when suddenly she grabbed a gun from one of the cops and aimed it at Kermit.

Walter, seeing this, shouted, "Kermit! Watch out!"

Kermit looked behind himself to see Zia pulling the trigger on the gun, firing a bullet. The frog screamed, fearing this was the end of him, until Sam jumped in the bullets and took it straight in the chest, right where his heart was.

"SAM!" the former Offed Muppets screamed.

"SAM!" the Muppet Show, Sesame Street, and Fraggle Rock Muppets hollered.

"SAM!" Kermit and Walter yelled. Sam stumbled on his feet for a few moments, before falling to the ground, seeming to be dead.

**Uh-oh, looks like Zia got one last chance to hurt the Muppets! **

**Did she succeed? **

**What will happen to the Muppets now since she'll be gone forever? **

**Who is Frank Oz? XD Sorry, had to say that!**

**Find out in the next chapter of Offed-The Big Show!**

**Please Follow, Favorite, and/or Review!**


	16. Planning a Big Show

Kermit, Walter and a few other Muppets knelt near Sam's body, thinking he was dead.

"Oh no, Sam…" Kermit muttered.

"Officers! Arrest that woman before she takes another life!" Sam the Eagle ordered.

The cops grabbed the gun out of Zia's hand and started to take her to the police cruiser again until Zondra ran up to the woman and kicked her in the face.

"That's for shooting Sam, you selfish bi-!" the girl screamed until Fozzie jumped in and said, "Beach ball! She was going to call her a beach ball! Right, Zondra?"

Zondra looked at the bear, about to correct him, until she noticed he was pointing towards the Sesame Street characters, which mainly consisted of children, implying, "Don't swear! There are kids here!" Zondra sighed and said, "Yeah, I was going to call her a beach ball…cause she's fat."

Then, by miracle, Sam coughed and sat up.

"He survived!" Zia shouted angrily.

"He survived!" all the Muppets cheered.

Dr. Bunsen Honeydew then stepped up and said, "But how? That bullet got him straight in the chest, specifically where his heart was. How did he survive?"

"Yeah, I felt the bullet hit that part. It knocked the breath out of me, but I didn't feel any other pain," Sam stated, sounding just as confused as Bunsen did. Then, his eyes lit up, getting an idea. "I wonder," he muttered as he reached inside his sports jacket and pulled out a small gold pin that was clipped on his shirt. He gasped when he looked at it.

"Is that…" Kermit said, walking over and taking a look at the pin. The frog gasped as well, where the other Muppets gathered around Sam to look at the pin. The _Sam & Friends_ characters all gasped at the sight of the pin, but Walter wasn't sure why.

The pin was a square gold pin with the words **Sam & Friends: Sam** printed into it. There was a small dent in the center of it, showing the bullet had hit it. The pin saved Sam's life.

"I don't believe it…do you think he…" Sam said to his friends.

"I don't know," Kermit replied, seeming to know what he was going to say.

"What is it?" Walter asked his friends.

"It's an old pin, duh," Zondra stated.

"Yeah, but it seems important. Sam, what's that pin you have there?" Walter asked the older Muppet.

"This is a gold pin I got from Jim Henson when Sam & Friends started to get popular. He said to wear it over my heart all the time to remember him," Sam stated.

"I have one too, but I kept it in a frame in my office. Since I don't exactly wear clothes, I couldn't wear the pin, but I didn't want to waste it," Kermit stated.

"We got our own pins too!" Harry the Hipster said as he and the other Sam & Friends characters held up pins similar to Sam's, only it had their names on each one.

"Wow, incredible," Walter said. "So…I guess in a sense…Jim saved you."

"Yeah, that's what I think too," Sam said, looking up at the sky, as if trying to look up into the heavens. A bunch of the other Muppets did the same thing too, amazed that they had help from above to save Sam's life.

"Thanks Jim," Kermit muttered.

After the tender moment passed, Sam and the other older Muppets put their pins away. Harry the Hipster asked, "So…what now?"

"Well, we're together again. And the Offed Muppets are official Muppets again, so…why don't we let the public know," Walter suggested.

"Good idea Walter, but how?" Sam agreed.

Walter thought for a few moments before he smiled, getting an idea, "I know!" he exclaimed, "The Muppet Show! You can be on that with us! Kermit, when's the next performance?"

Kermit was quiet, thinking to himself until he suddenly let out an ear-piercing scream, making everyone jump.

"What! What is it? You only do this when something is horribly wrong!" Fozzie yelped.

"The show is **tonight**! And we were all so busy stopping Zia, we didn't rehearse much this week!" Kermit shouted.

"Oh no! I forgot!" Scooter gasped. "And we don't even have a guest star!"

"Scooter, that just made things so much worse!" Kermit yelled.

"Sorry, chief!"

"Kermit! Calm down! You'll give yourself a heart attack at your age," Sam warned the frog, who gave him his befuddled face, meaning, "Did you really have to bring up my age?"

"What are we going to do?" Fozzie asked the other Muppet Show Muppets. "We're barely rehearsed and we don't have a star. We're doomed!"

"Doomed! That's not good," Boober Fraggle said.

"There has to be something to do," Vicki said.

"I wish I could help you dudes, but this never happened on Muppets Tonight," Clifford said.

While Kermit and his coworkers freaked out, the Sam & Friends characters, Sesame Street Muppets, Jim Henson Hour Muppets, Muppets Tonight Muppets, Fraggles and humans huddled in a big group, talking about something out of earshot. Then, after a few minutes, they broke the huddle and Sam hollered, "Hey guys! We got an idea!"

The Muppets, not hearing him, continued talking amongst themselves.

"Hello! Hey!" Clifford shouted, trying to get their attention, but it didn't work.

"Let me handle this," Zondra said to her friends before she suddenly screamed at the Muppets, "QUIET!"

All the Muppets froze in fear, looking in the girl's direction in shock, surprised she could shout so loudly. "I knew that would get your attention," Zondra said, smirking.

"As I was trying to say, we got an idea!" Sam said.

"What sort of idea, Sam?" Kermit asked.

"Well, for the guest star situation, maybe we can guest star. I mean, we're all in a sense celebrities and nobody's seen a handful of us in years. It'd make the show interesting," Sam stated.

"Well…" Kermit said, thinking it over.

"Come on, Uncle Kermit! Sam's plan sounds fun!" Robin exclaimed.

"Yeah!" Walter agreed.

"Well…okay, Sam! You can all help!" Kermit said, smiling. "But what about the rehearsal situation? The show is in 8 hours."

"8 hours? Kermit, that's easy. Don't you remember back when we were doing _Sam & Friends_? We had to prepare for a 5 minute live broadcast every day. This can't be as hard. How long is this Muppet Show?" Sam asked.

"Um…an hour?" Kermit guessed.

Sam thought for a few moments before he said, "Okay, guys, let's get back to the Muppet Theater as fast as we can! We have no time to lose! Let's go!"

"Can I come too?" Constantine asked, sounding hopeful.

Kermit thought for a few seconds before saying, "Oh what the hey, of course."

"Excellent! Now I just need my clothes for my act!" Constantine said happily.

At that moment, all the Muppets and humans got into their modes of transportation, with the former Offed Muppets having to go into separate vehicles and they drove back to the theater. Of course, they had to stop at the bridge and let the Offed Muppets grab whatever they needed for the show; mainly Solid Foam had to grab their instruments, and Professor Madcliffe needed to get something from his cave lab, where he returned with a big slightly flat box.

Once at the theater, all the Muppets literally ran out of the cars and buses and raced into the theater, frantic to get ready for their show that would occur that night. Inside, the Muppets were all associating with one another while prepping. Professor Madcliffe and Digit approached Dr. Honeydew and Beaker. "Hey, Bunsen, me and Digit have this invention we want to show on Muppet Labs. Do you want to help us demonstrate it?" Professor M asked the scientist.

"Why of course, Professor Madcliffe! Anything for an old friend," Bunsen said happily. "Now what is this invention?"

Digit handed the Muppet a packet of notes, which Bunsen and Beaker looked at for a few moments. Beaker yelped fearfully.

"Incredible! You actually managed to build that?" Dr. Honeydew exclaimed.

"Yes, but we're not sure if it works yet. So we want to test it. We already know who will do it," Digit stated.

Beaker was ready to bolt out of the room.

"Oh? And who would that be?" Bunsen asked, curious.

"Walter. He saw us building it and he practically begged to try it out! But it wasn't ready at the time, so he could ride it, but we said he could try it once it was finished, and now since it's finished, we're going to let him try it out," Digit stated with a grin.

"Really? Walter? That's the first time someone other than Beaker has volunteered to test an invention in Muppet Labs," Dr. Honeydew said, very surprised. "Beaker, are you okay with Walter taking your spot for this one Muppet labs sketch?"

Beaker just nodded and said, "Meep mee mo mi." [Translation: Yeah, sure, let the kid have fun.]

"Well, I guess it's settled! Walter will be testing out this invention of yours!" Bunsen said.

"Oh good," Professor Madcliffe said.

"Meep, mee mee," Beaker meeped. [Yeah, really good.] At that moment, Beaker walked out of the room, where Bunsen, Digit and Professor Madcliffe heard him meep loudly, "Meep! Mo mee mi mo mee!" [Yes! For once I will not get hurt!]

"He's a little too excited about this, isn't he?" Madcliffe asked Bunsen.

"Well, after all these years…I'm not too surprised he did that," Bunsen admitted.

In the Electric Mayhem's dressing room, the band were trying to find a song to perform in the show, when Flash, Beard, Clifford, Digit and Francine entered the room.

"Hey Dr. Teeth!" Clifford greeted his old friend.

"Hey Clifford," Dr. Teeth said, greeting his old friend. "What brings you cats here?"

"'Ey, Doc. We 'as 'ondering if you guys want ta 'erform wi' us," Flash explained.

Janice got a confused expression and asked Francine, "Like, what did he say?"

"He says 'Hey Doc, we was wondering if you guys want to perform with us'. You know, like in a compilation," Francine translated.

"Really? Groovy! What song were you planning?" Dr. Teeth asked.

Flash whipped out an album and handed it to Dr. Teeth. "It's uh 'irst 'rack," the saxophonist said.

"First track," Digit repeated.

Dr. Teeth nodded and looked at the back of the album, where his eyes widened and the keyboardist said, "Wow, didn't think you guys heard that compilation yet, with you all living in a cave for all those years."

"We try our best to get updated on anyone new in the music business. Spamela's been doing the same by looking at magazines," Clifford explained.

"Well, I think we have a deal," Dr. Teeth said, grinning at his friends.

In Kermit's office, Sam entered, saying, "Kermit, I have an idea for what I should perform. But I need an assistant."

"Okay, what are you planning on doing?" Kermit asked his old friend.

"Well…I was planning on singing 'Old Black Magic'. You know the song, we sang it once," Sam stated.

Kermit slammed his head into a desk, remembering the skit they had to do for Sam & Friends, back when he was shorter, lanky and lacked a collar. He had to wear a blonde wig and lip sync the song with Sam since Henrietta was sick that day. "Sam, I'm not going to wear a blonde wig," Kermit said flatly.

"Actually Kermit-," Sam tried to say until Kermit said, "Or a red wig."

"Uh Kermit-."

"Or a brown, black, white or gray wig."

"Okay, I get that but-."

"Not even a **green** one!"

"Kermit…you assume things way too quickly," Sam said, figuring out that all the other Muppets must've found out about the old video which was probably all over YouTube now.

"Why? What were you planning on doing with that old song?" Kermit asked, curious.

"Well, I kind of wanted to sing it with Miss Piggy. I was hoping that would be okay with you," Sam stated.

"Oh, that's fine. That's good, but be careful not to make her angry. I'm sure you're aware of her karate chops," Kermit said.

"Yes, Kermit, you told everyone about them. I'll try my best to be careful," Sam said before exiting the room to tell Miss Piggy his plan.

Downstairs, Dr. Teeth was looking through a stack of albums, trying to find a modern song that he could sing as a solo. He wanted it to be groovy with a hint of love. He searched until he came across something, which made him grin.

Zondra was sitting by herself in the canteen, not doing anything, since she didn't think she'd be able to do anything for the show, until Walter came downstairs. "Hey Zondra, aren't you going to prep for the show?" he asked the girl.

"Well, to be honest, Walter. All the songs I know are the anti-men, anti-rat and anti-bear ones, and now since I have a new look at men, rats and bears, I can't sing them," Zondra admitted.

"Zondra, the song you sing doesn't have to be your own song. You can do a cover of another singer or song group," Walter stated.

"Really? Like what?" Zondra asked.

Walter thought for a few moments before his eyes lit up, coming up with an idea, which he whispered to Zondra, who also smiled. "That would be fun, and I do like that song."

All day, the Muppets rehearsed for the show, with the help of their human friends, until day turned into night and it was time for the show to begin!

**Well, the Muppets are doing a crossover show with their friends from Sesame Street, Fraggle Rock, Jim Henson Hour, Muppets Tonight and Sam & Friends!**

**What is Professor Madcliffe and Digit's invention that has gotten Bunsen so amazed? **

**What song does Solid Foam want to perform with the Electric Mayhem?**

**What song is Dr. Teeth going to sing by himself?**

**What will occur in Sam and Miss Piggy's musical number? **

**What song did Walter suggest to Zondra? Find out in the next chapter of Offed-The Big Show [Yeah, I know that's part of what I said last time, but I had to rename this chapter].**

**Please Follow, Favorite, and/or Review!**


	17. The Big Show

That night, people were starting to buy tickets for the show and flow into the theater. Robin watched through the curtains, surprised by the big number.

"Hey Walter, I think we sold out this time," Robin said.

"Are you sure we did and Constantine didn't bribe people into coming?" Walter asked the little frog.

"Sure, blame me," Constantine sneered from behind him.

"I was just kidding," Walter said, turning around to face the evil frog until he literally choked on air in shock.

Constantine was wearing a white open-necked button down shirt, with a silver sequined suit jacket, flared trousers, and a shiny medallion necklace.

"Constantine…what the heck are you wearing?" Walter asked in a very flat voice.

"Style. You should try it sometime," Constantine said, walking off.

"Um, I don't think that-," Walter said, trying to tell Constantine that a lot of the clothes he was wearing was sort of out of style, but the frog was gone.

At that moment, Zondra walked up to Walter and said, "Its times like this when I wish Joan Rivers was alive, because she would've had a lot to say about that outfit."

"None of them compliments, right?" Walter assumed, and Zondra nodded.

After a few minutes, the auditorium was completely filled with people. "Wow, we really sold out," Fozzie stated, looking at the crowd.

"Yeah, either that or they were bribed," Kermit said.

Constantine stepped up to the emcee and said, "Sorry, Walter made that joke a few moments ago."

"Oh, sorry," Kermit said before he ran out onstage and got into his position in the O of the Muppet Show sign. He took a deep breath before stick his head out of the O and exclaimed, "It's the Muppet Show with our very special guest stars, the cast of Sesame Street, Fraggle Rock, Sam & Friends, Muppets Tonight and Jim Henson Hour! Yaay!"

The audience applauded loudly, and excitedly it also seemed. Then, Kermit exited the O, which rose, revealing the arches and Muppets started to walk on, singing the theme.

It's time to play the music

It's time to light the lights

It's time to meet the Muppets on the Muppet Show tonight

It's time to put on makeup

It's time to dress up right

It's time to raise the curtain on the Muppet Show tonight

Up in the balcony, Statler asked Waldorf, "Did we get everything we needed from the lobby."

"Yep," Waldorf said holding up a bag. "They had a sale on rotten tomatoes!"

And now let's get things started

Why don't you get things started

It's time to get things started

On the most sensational inspirational, celebrational, Muppetational

This is what we call the Muppet Show!

The audience applauded loudly as the curtains closed.

"Wow," Lew Zealand said as he climbed down from the arches. "That was a great rehearsal! When do we do the real thing?"

"That was the real thing, Lew," Fozzie told the performer.

After the arches were removed, Kermit ran onstage wearing his tux and said, "Hi-ho ladies and gentlemen. Kermit the frog here and welcome to the Muppet Show, where we have a different variety of guests tonight, some of our Muppet friends from many different shows, so tonight's show might be slightly more interesting and lot more crazy." The audience clapped and the frog then said, "And for our first musical performance, we have an old friend of ours come all the way from Russia to dance to one of his favorite songs. So ladies and gentlemen, here's Constantine the Frog."

Kermit exited the stage and the curtains opened, revealing Constantine standing onstage wearing his disco attire in what appeared to be a 70s-esque scene, and the criminal started to dance to The Hustle by Van McCoy. Backstage, Kermit asked Nadya and the other Gulag prisoners, "Constantine does know disco is dead, right?"

"No, he was first locked up in 1978," Nadya explained.

"And who was free sometimes in July 1979?" Kermit asked the prisoners.

"We all were," Big Papa admitted. "But we didn't have the heart to tell him disco died."

A few minutes into Constantine's dance performance, Statler shouted from the balcony, "Hey frog, disco's dead!"

At that moment, Constantine froze mid-dance move with a shocked expression. He stood up straight and shouted, "What! When?!"

"July 12 1979," Waldorf stated.

Constantine looked at the audience and shouted, "Raise your hands if you knew this!"

Nearly every person raised their hand and when Constantine glanced backstage, he saw a majority of the Muppets and humans raising their hands as well.

"Well…this sucks," Constantine said before angrily stomping off the stage as the curtains closed.

Kermit walked back onstage and said, "Well, looks like Constantine was a little bit uninformed on music and dancing for a few years."

"You shut up!" Constantine snapped backstage.

"Sheesh, now, let's listen to a song that's a little bit more in our time. Everyone I give you the Electric Mayhem…" Kermit stated, when the audience then cheered very loudly, excited. "And Solid Foam." At that moment, the applause stopped, for nobody knew who Solid Foam was.

At that point, Clifford stepped out from behind the curtains and said, "You'll recognize them once you see them." Before he quickly exited.

Kermit nodded before walking offstage and the curtains reopened, this time showing the band on separate pyramids; the Electric Mayhem on a black one and Solid Foam on a white. "We are the Electric Mayhem and Solid Foam!" Clifford hollered. "One, two, three go!"

At that moment, both bands started to play the starting notes for Boulevard of Broken Dreams/Wonderwall, but it wasn't the same original by Green Day.

Floyd Pepper: I walk a lonely road, the only one that I have ever known. Don't know where it goes, but it's home to me and I walk alone

Flash: Today is gonna be the day that they're gonna throw it back to you.

Floyd: I walk this empty street on the Boulevard of Broken Dreams. Where the city sleeps and I'm the only one and I walk alone.

Flash: By now you shoulda somehow realized what you gotta do. [Floyd: I walk alone, I walk along] I don't believe that anybody feels the way I do about you now [Floyd: I walk alone, I walk alone.]

Floyd & Flash: My shadow's the only one that walks beside me. My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating. Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me. 'Til then I walk alone.

Clifford: Every day I wake up and it's Sunday. [Oh oh, oh oh, oh oh] Whatever's in my head won't go away. [Oh oh, oh oh, oh oh] The radio is playing all the usual [Oh oh, oh oh, oh oh] And what's a Wonderwall anyway?

Flash: Back beat, the word is on the street that the fire in your heart is out. [Oh oh, oh oh, oh oh] I'm sure you've heard it all before but you never really had a doubt. [Oh oh, oh oh, oh oh] I don't believe that anybody feels the way I do about you now... [Oh oh, oh oh, oh oh]

Floyd: I'm walking down the line that divides me somewhere in my mind. On the border line of the edge and where I walk alone

Flash: Today is gonna be the day that they're gonna throw it back to you

Floyd: Read between the lines, what's messed up and everything's alright. Check my vital signs to know I'm still alive and I walk alone

Flash: Today is gonna be the day that they're gonna throw it back to you [Floyd: I walk along, I walk alone] By now you shoulda somehow realized what you gotta do [I walk alone, I walk alone.]

Clifford: And all the roads we have to walk are winding. And all the lights that lead us there are blinding. There are many things that I would like to say to you but I don't know how.

Floyd: I walk this empty street on the Boulevard of Broken Dreams

Flash: Today is gonna be the day that they're gonna throw it back to you.

Floyd: I walk this empty street on the Boulevard of Broken Dreams.

Flash: By now you shoulda somehow realized what you gotta do.

Floyd: Where the city sleeps and I'm the only one and I walk a...

Floyd: My shadow's the only one that walks beside me [Flash: maybe, you're gonna be the one that saves me] My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating [Maybe, you're gonna be the one that saves me] Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me [Maybe, you're gonna be the one that saves me saves me] 'Til then I walk alone.

Dr. Teeth: Sing with me; sing for the year

Clifford: Sing it!

Dr. Teeth: Sing for the laughter, sing for the tear. Sing with me, just for today. Maybe tomorrow, the good Lord will take you away...

As soon as the song ended, the audience clapped loudly, very pleased with the song and performance. The curtains closed and the band exited the stage as Beauregard and Sweetums moved the pyramid off the stage and started to move the Muppet Labs set.

Kermit said into the PA system, "Muppet Labs up next!"

Backstage, in the Electric Mayhem dressing room, Dr. Teeth was alone in the room, polishing his keyboard, when Zoot entered. "Hey Doc," the saxophonist greeted his lover.

"Hey Zoot," Teeth responded, getting up from his keyboard and walking over to him. He glanced behind Zoot and around the room to see if there was anyone around so he could what he wanted to next without being interrupted or judged. He leaned down towards Zoot and planted a kiss on the saxophonist's lips.

Zoot blushed and asked him, "What if someone saw that?"

"Why do you think I looked around first?" Dr. Teeth stated.

"…Good point," Zoot said. "So, what are you doing?"

"Oh, I was polishing my keyboard and I was about to practice this one song I was going to do for a solo later in the show," Dr. Teeth explained.

"Really? Can I hear it, man?" Zoot asked.

"No, no, no, it's secret," Dr. Teeth stated, pushing Zoot out of the room.

"Secret? Why is it secret?" Zoot asked his boyfriend.

"You'll know later," Dr. Teeth told him before shutting the door.

Zoot thought for a few seconds before he smiled, already guessing what sort of song Dr. Teeth was planning on singing.

Onstage, Bunsen, Beaker, Professor Madcliffe and Digit were standing behind the lab table where something was covered with a tarp. "Welcome to Muppet Labs, where the future is being made today. I'm Dr. Bunsen Honeydew and this is my assistant Beaker, and these two Muppets accompanying us are Professor Madcliffe and Digit," Bunsen greeted the audience.

"Meep," Beaker said. [Hello]

"Greetings ladies and gentlemen," Professor Madcliffe greeted.

"Hello," Digit said.

"Now, you're probably wondering what is sitting on the table in front of us. Well, I'll tell you this, it's very interesting. This here, everyone, is…" Bunsen said, yanking off the tarp revealing a silver, inch thick, oval shaped disk. "A hover board!"

The audience gasped and started clapping. "Yes, everyone, this is an actual hover board created by my good friends Professor Madcliffe and Digit. I can tell you're all very excited. But don't get too excited, because we don't know how well it works yet, so we need to test this, but here's the most interesting part; Beaker will not be the Muppet testing the hover board," Bunsen said.

The entire audience gasped in shock. Up in the balcony, Waldorf said, "Beaker won't be testing this invention?!"

"Is the end finally near?" Statler asked.

"Oh heavens no, it's just that someone else volunteered to test it," Bunsen explained.

"Now I know the end is near!" Statler said.

"Yeah, what kind of crazy person would want to test one of your inventions," Waldorf agreed.

At that moment, Walter ran onstage wearing a helmet, elbow pads, and knee pads. "I'm here, I just needed to get the right safety equipment," he explained.

"Our friend Walter will be testing the hover board in Beaker's place. Now, let's get this experiment going, shall we," Dr. Honeydew said as he took the board off the table and set it on the floor. "Stand on the board, Walter," he said.

"Okay," Walter said, standing on the hover board. When nothing happened, he said, "Professor Madcliffe, it's not hovering."

"There's an on-off switch on the front," Madcliffe explained, pointing at a small gray button on the tip of the hover board.

"Oh right, Walter said, pressing the button.

Within a few seconds, the hover board started to rise off the floor and Walter controlled it to move around the stage. He rode it around the table to show the audience it was really hovering, making all them applaud loudly and give a standing ovation.

"I don't believe it! It works!" Digit exclaimed. "Finally, something invented by Muppets actually worked!"

Walter grinned as he flew higher and higher in the air until he actually started to fly around the auditorium. After a few moments, Walter went back over to the stage. "So, how do I get down?" he asked.

"Um…trying leaning the board down a little on the front," Professor Madcliffe suggested. Walter did just that, but nothing happened, it just made the board go slower. "It's not working," he stated.

"Okay…hit the switch. Maybe it'll turn it off and slowly lower back to the ground," Digit said.

"Maybe?" Bunsen said, confused.

Walter pressed the button to turn it off, which it immediately did and fell to the ground, landing on top of Beaker, followed closely by Walter. The boy then stood up and said "Good thing I had on this safety equipment. That could've been very painful."

At that moment, Beaker stood up, stumbling from the impact before he collapsed to the ground. "Beaker, are you okay?" Walter asked the Muppet concerned.

The audience applauded as the curtains closed, where the Muppets exited the stage so they could set up for the next act. Backstage, Miss Piggy walked up to Kermit and said, "Kermie, I so glad you let moi do this number."

"Yeah, I kind of figured you'd like it. I hope you don't mind you're doing the number with Sam," Kermit said.

"Of course I don't mind," Miss Piggy said, walking onstage where Sam was already standing with Rowlf, Lips, and Zoot sitting nearby. When the curtains opened, Sam gave them the cue to start playing, where he started dancing around Miss Piggy.

Sam: Old black magic has me in its spell

Miss Piggy: Old black magic that you weave so well

Sam: Those icy fingers up and down my spine

Miss Piggy: The same old witchcraft when your eyes meet mine

Sam: Same old tingle that I feel inside

Miss Piggy: And then that elevator starts its ride

Sam: Down and down I go

Piggy: Round and round I go

Sam: Like a leaf caught in the tide

Miss Piggy: I should stay away but what can I do. I hear your name, and I'm a flame

Sam: Flame, burning desire

Piggy: That only your kiss

Sam: Put out the fire

During the instrumental, Miss Piggy said, "Now Sam, don't get too happy about performing with moi. You might make Kermit jealous." Then, the pig thought for a few seconds before she said, "On second thought."

Sam: For your the lover that I've waited for

Piggy: You're the mate that fate had me created for and every time your lips meet mine

Sam: Baby down and down I go, round and round I go. In a spin, loving the spin that I'm in, under that old black magic called love

Piggy: Ooh in a spin, lovin the spin I'm in, under the old black magic called love

Both: In a spin, lovin the spin I'm in, under the old black magic called love

Piggy: I should stay away but what can I do. I hear your name and I'm a flame

Sam: Flame, burning desire

Piggy: That only your kiss

Sam: Put out the fire. For your the lover I have waited for

Piggy: You're the mate that fate had me created for and every time your lips meet mine

Sam: Baby down and down I go, round and round I go. In a spin, loving the spin that I'm in, under that old black magic called love

Piggy: Ah, in a spin, lovin the spin I'm in, under the old black magic called love

Both: In a spin, lovin the spin I'm in, under the old black magic called love. Under the old black magic called love!

The audience applauded loudly at the performance, thinking it was pretty good. Then, an elderly woman made her way towards the stage, smiling. "I was wondering for years if you would ever make a comeback, Sam," she said.

"Who are you?" Sam asked the lady, not sure if he's met her before.

Piggy gasped and said, "Betty White?"

"Yes, that's me," the old woman said, still smiling. "And I just came up to tell you Sam, I was in my mid-thirties when your show was on."

"Really? Thank you," Sam said as the woman walked back to her seat, then muttered to Miss Piggy, "How old is she?"

"She's 92. She must've been, about 33 when Sam & Friends was on and nearly 40 when it must've stopped," Miss Piggy explained.

"Great, that means I'm as old as her," Sam sighed before he exited the stage with Miss Piggy following close behind as the curtains closed.

Kermit then walked onstage and said, "And now for some music that was made a couple decades later after that last song, ladies and gentlemen, Zondra singing 'Barracuda' by Heart!"

The curtains reopened revealing the Janice, Floyd, Beard and Clifford with their instruments in the background and Zondra stood at a microphone, with her own electric guitar. She took a deep breath and cued the guitar players to start playing. Janice played the intro cords of Barracuda and Zondra started singing as the other musicians joined in.

So this ain't the end, I saw you again today

Had to turn my heart away

You smiled like the Sun, kisses for everyone

And tales, it never fails!

You lying so low in the weeds

Bet you gonna ambush me

You'd have me down, down, down to my knees

Wouldn't you, Barracuda?

The musicians played the instrumental part of the song as Walter watched backstage.

Scooter walked up and said, "Wow, she's really good."

"Yeah, she sure is," Walter said.

Back over time when we were all trying for free

Met up with porpoise and me

No right no wrong you're selling a song, a name

Whisper game

If the real thing don't do the trick

You better make up something quick

You gonna burn, burn, burn, burn, burn it out to the wick

Aren't you, Barracuda?

"Sell me sell you" the porpoise said

Dive down deep to save my head

You, I think you got the blues too

All that night and all the next

Swam without looking back

Made for the western pools, silly fools!

Zondra then started to do the guitar solo section of the song very rapidly, making the audience cheer loudly.

If the real thing don't do the trick

You better make up something quick

You gonna burn, burn, burn, burn, burn it out to the wick

Barracuda!

She and the other musicians did the outro of the song and when they finished, the audience applauded loudly. Zondra bowed and left the stage. "Wow! Zondra, that turned out better than I thought. I thought it was just going to be an awesome performance, but it turned amazing! Good job!" Walter stated.

"Thanks Walter, I was nervous up there, but I'm glad I did very good," Zondra said as Robin, Elmo, Abby Cadabby and Zoe stepped up to the two Muppets.

"One, two, three, go," Robin conducted before the four kids started to sing, "Walter and Zondra, sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-."

Walter seemed to burn a bright red as the kids sang and Zondra got an annoyed expression.

"First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes Walter with the ba-," the kids sang until Zondra interrupted them saying in a very threatening tone, "Finish that song and that'll be the last song you will ever sing."

The kids froze with fear, getting the message, and Robin said, "Okay. Come on, guys, let's go!" The four kids then ran off to hide from the girl. "Gee, Zondra, you didn't have to threaten them. They're just being kids," Walter told the girl.

Zondra sighed and said, "Sorry, I'm not good with little kids. I always end up getting irritated by them."

"It's okay. I'm sure those little guys will forgive you," Walter said, giving her a sympathetic smile.

After the Swedish Chef did a performance with Omar which involved singing cheese, all the girl Muppets sang Let It Go, even though Miss Piggy was originally going to sing it solo, which ticked her off a little, and the Great Gonzo did a very crazy stunt involving using the hover board to jump from a great height into a vat of oatmeal it was finally time for Dr. Teeth's solo.

Zoot came up to the Electric Mayhem's dressing room to tell him, but he found the keyboardist and his keyboard were already gone. "I wonder if he's onstage right now. At least I'll find out sooner what this secret song he wanted to sing was," Zoot shrugged before heading out to watch the performance backstage.

**Wow, this show is getting pretty good. What is the song that Dr. Teeth is going to sing solo? **

**What will happen after the performance is over? **

**In the next chapter of Offed-The Conclusion!**

**Louis Prima owns That Old Black Magic**

**Heart owns Barracuda**

**Green Day owns Boulevard of Broken dreams compilation.**

**Please Follow, Favorite, and/or Review!**


	18. The Conclusion

Dr. Teeth was onstage, sitting by his keyboard, ready to perform the song he wanted to sing. Zoot was watching the performance from backstage, ready to be amazed by this song his lover wanted to keep secret from him so badly. Dr. Teeth took a deep breath before he started to play the song.

I was a boat drifting out into sea

I had nothing but pieces of thoughts of the hope that you would see me

I was a stone's throw away from land, but thousands and thousands of miles away from reaching your hand

The waves that crashed upon, the rocks that you were trying to walk along, and in my head I heard them play a song for you and me

The waves that crashed upon, the rocks that you were trying to step along, and in my head I heard them play a song for you and me

Let's get lost at Sea, where they will never find us

Got stars at night to guide us

Lost at Sea, where they will never find us

Got stars at night to guide us

Oh yeah

At that moment, Dr. Teeth started to play the keyboard solo in the song, while Zoot continued to listen. He had to admit, he played it very well. Of course, someone in the band was probably going to ask him why he was sang a Zedd song, little would the Muppet know, Zoot really liked Zedd's music. Dr. Teeth then continued with the song.

I was a boat drifting out into sea

I had nothing but pieces of thoughts of the hope that you would see me

I was a stone's throw away from land, but thousands and thousands of miles away from reaching your hand

The waves that crashed upon, the rocks that you were trying to walk along, and in my head I heard them play a song for you and me

The waves that crashed upon, the rocks that you were trying to step along, and in my head I heard them play a song for you and me

Let's get lost at Sea, where they will never find us

Got stars at night to guide us

Lost at Sea, where they will never find us

Got stars at night to guide us

Oh yeah

When the keyboardist finished, the audience responded with loud applause, making him grin. After the curtains closed, the musician took his keyboard and headed backstage, where he saw Zoot had been watching. "Did you like it?" he asked his secret lover.

Zoot nodded, smiling, "Yeah. I did."

Dr. Teeth grinned, set his keyboard somewhere and headed upstairs where he and Zoot entered the dressing room.

A while later into the show, Walter ran up to Wontkins, saying, "Wontkins! I fixed Wilkins!"

"Really? How?" Wontkins asked.

"Well, I got him a cup of Starbucks, and after the first sip, he seemed to act like his normal self again!" Walter stated. "And it gave him an idea for an act he wants to do with you, with a little permission from Starbuck coffee of course. You're needed onstage now!"

"Alright! Let's get this over with!" Wontkins said heading onstage.

The curtains opened, revealing Wilkins sitting on a fence with Wontkins on the fence too, strapped to a small rocket. Wilkins had a big cup of Starbucks and the Muppet asked Wontkins, "Want a cup of Starbucks before you go to the moon?"

"No!" Wontkins shouted.

"Okay, suit yourself, pal," Wilkins said as he lit the fuse on the rocket. Within seconds, the rocket shot up into the air and flew away, with Wontkins screaming on it. Then, Wilkins said, "Starbucks is just a 'blastoff', it's out of this world!"

The audience laughed at the scene and clapped.

As the curtains closed, Kermit hollered, "Someone get Wontkins down from the ceiling! I can see he's stuck!"

"Got it!" Gonzo said, whipping out a slingshot and a small rock, which he fired up at the ceiling, where Wontkins was stuck halfway through. When the rock struck him, the Muppet was forced loose and fell to the floor.

"You okay, Wontkins?" Walter asked the older Muppet.

"Yeah, I'm used to stuff like that happening. I was set fire once for a commercial once. Getting shot through a roof is nothing!"

"Okay! Now, I believe now it's time for the finale! We need to round up the Muppets we need for the act. Someone go and find the band," Kermit instructed.

"I know Floyd, Animal, Lips, and Solid Foam are, like, ready, but we need Dr. Teeth and Zoot. I think they're up in the dressing room," Janice said.

"Well, let's go get them," Skeeter said. The two girls walked up the steps to the dressing rooms and opened the door to the Electric Mayhem's room, about to tell the musicians they were needed onstage only to see a very surprising sight.

Dr. Teeth was sitting on the sofa in the room, with Zoot in his lap, his arms wrapped around his waist and Zoot had his arms wrapped around the keyboardist's neck. The two Muppets were making out and the girls could actually hear Zoot moaning in pleasure a little!

The two Muppets slowly shut the door before they were noticed and after it was completely shut, Skeeter asked Janice, "Do you want to run downstairs and get Floyd or my brother to do this?"

"No, Skeeter, we have to do this ourselves. And besides, if we get someone else to do it, they'll like, accuse us of being homophobic or something and they'll tell all the other Muppets of their relationship!" Janice hissed. "I never knew Zoot was bi though…"

"Zoot! What about Dr. Teeth? He's the one you should wonder about!" Skeeter stated. "Well, how do we tell them they're needed onstage?"

"I don't know! I don't want to go in there because I might make things awkward for them since they haven't come out yet!" Janice stated.

"Well, I'm not going in there!" Skeeter half-shouted. "Maybe we should knock on the door."

"No, they're like, too into the making out to hear it," Janice stated. "Trust me, it happens. Maybe we can shout from the outside."

"No, then people will think we're too lazy to open the door," Skeeter said.

As the girls argued about what to do, Zondra showed up upon hearing the noise and asked, "What the heck are you two doing? You need to get Dr. Teeth and Zoot."

"We found them," Skeeter stated.

"But we can't get them," Janice added.

"And why not?" Zondra asked.

Skeeter opened the door just wide enough for Zondra to look inside, where the girl saw Dr. Teeth and Zoot making out. She scoffed and said, "Really? That bugs you? Let me handle this."

Zondra cleared her throat before she threw open the door and shouted, "GET A ROOM YOU TWO!" Upon hearing her shout, both Zoot and Dr. Teeth jumped, which caused Zoot to fall out of Dr. Teeth's lap and land on the floor. "Ow…" he groaned, rubbing his head and getting to his feet.

"And also you're not onstage in 5," Zondra added before shutting the door and bursting out laughing.

"Wooooow Zondra," Janice said, face palming at the girl's actions.

"I'm sorry! I've always wanted to do that!" Zondra exclaimed, still laughing.

"I've always wanted to do it, too, but I'd rather do it to people I don't know and probably never see again," Skeeter said, shaking her head. Zondra was still laughing as the girls went back downstairs and prepared to go onstage.

Inside the dressing room, Zoot said, "Doc…that was Zondra and I heard Skeeter and Janice's voices. I think they know about us now."

"Don't worry about them. I'm sure they're open-minded girls. If it was Sam the Eagle or Constantine walking in, _then_ you can worry," Dr. Teeth told his boyfriend before the couple exited from the room.

Onstage, everyone was waiting in their places and Dr. Teeth stood by his keyboard and Zoot retrieved his saxophone from Lips, who held onto it for him. Both men noticed Janice and Skeeter were giving them weird, but also awkward expressions, meaning their probably embarrassed about seeing the two of them making out. Zondra was also onstage, where she seemed to be trying to refrain from laughing.

Walter noticed this and asked the girl, "What's so funny?"

"I'll tell you later," the girl said, snickering.

Dr. Teeth and Zoot shook their heads in annoyance and decided to pretend the three girls weren't doing anything.

Then, the curtains opened, where Janice on guitar started to play the first opening chords of "Hey Brother" by Avicii. Floyd then took the first verse.

Hey brother, there's an endless road to re-discover.

Clifford: Hey sister, know the water's sweet but blood is thicker.

Kermit: Oh, if the sky comes falling down for you,

Fozzie: There's nothing in this world I wouldn't do.

Animal then began to play the beat to the song on his drums.

Gonzo: Hey brother, do you still believe in one another?

Rowlf: Hey sister, do you still believe in love, I wonder?

Robin: Oh, if the sky comes falling down for you,

Walter: There's nothing in this world I wouldn't do.

Scooter: What if I'm far from home?

Skeeter: Oh, brother I will hear you call.

Miss Piggy: What if I lose it all?

Spamela Hamderson: Oh, sister I will help you out!

Dr. Teeth: Oh, if the sky comes falling down for you,

Lips: There's nothing in this world I wouldn't do.

Lips then proceeded to play the trumpet part of the song as everyone clapped to the tune. Then, the rest of the Electric Mayhem and Solid Foam joined in on the instrumental to the song.

Sam [Sam & Friends one]: Hey brother, there's an endless road to re-discover.

Harry the Hipster: Hey sister, do you still believe in love, I wonder?

Wilkins and Wontkins: Oh, if the sky comes falling down for you,

Digit: There's nothing in this world I wouldn't do.

Flash: What if I'm far from home?

Zoot: Oh, brother I will hear you call.

Zondra: What if I lose it all?

Janice: Oh, sister I will help you out!

Everyone: Oh, if the sky comes falling down for you, there's nothing in this world I wouldn't do.

Then, the bands played the last instrumental section of the song as the other Muppets clapped to the beat. After the song was over, all the audience cheered and clapped very loudly.

Kermit ran up front and said, "Thank! And that's all for the Muppet Show! Let's just have special thanks for our guest stars for being here to do this show with us! Everyone, the cast of Sesame Street, Fraggle Rock, Sam & Friends, Jim Henson Hour, and Muppets Tonight! Yay!"

Sam tapped on Fozzie's shoulder and asked, "Why does he go 'Yay' like that?"

"He got it from his teacher," Fozzie explained.

"That's what I thought," Sam said, shaking his head.

The audiences applauded as each Muppet and human took a bow. When the show was officially over, and the auditorium was empty, all the Sesame Street characters, Fraggle Rock characters, Constantine, Nadya, Jean Pierre Napoleon and the gulag prisoners started to go home.

"Listen, thanks for coming all this way to help us. You were really helpful," Kermit said to his friends.

"No problem, Kermit. We're glad we helped you," Gobo said.

"Yeah, and we're glad we could be on your show!" Elmo added.

"Thanks, I'm glad you had fun in the performance," Kermit said, smiling.

Constantine then stepped up and said, "You know…maybe you Muppets aren't as irritating as I had thought before."

"Gee, thanks, Constantine," Kermit said, not sure how to respond to that statement.

After everyone left, the remainder Muppets went back into the theater and prepared to head home. "Are you sure you want to stay at the cave?" Kermit asked Sam and the other former Offed Muppets.

"Yeah, it's a great way to avoid the press and crazy fans. Also, it's very peaceful. Plus, Digit and Professor Madcliffe figured out how solar and lunar power worked from Dr. Honeydew. We'll be able to live a little easier," Sam stated.

"Okay then, we'll have to stop by the bridge and get you guys to the theater," Walter said.

"We don't mind walking. We know all the short cuts to the theater," Zondra said.

"Zoot, are you going back with them?" Dr. Teeth asked his secret lover.

Zoot looked at the keyboardist and smiled, saying, "No. I'm going to stay at the Muppet Boarding House. My place is with you…and the rest of the band!" Walter noticed said that last part very quickly and frantically.

"I wonder what's up with Zoot," he said to himself, until he noticed Zondra was snickering again. "Does the reason about your snickering involve those two?" he asked the girl.

Zondra nodded and whispered into the Muppet's ear, and whatever she said made Walter's mouth drop open and say, "Wow, I never knew."

"Knew what?" Kermit asked the boy.

"That Zoot and Dr. Teeth are in a rel-," Walter tried to say when Dr. Teeth stretched his hand toward the Muppet and covered his mouth, preventing him from speaking. "It's not that important!" he said.

Zoot shook his head, laughing.

"You know, I think I'm going to move back into the Muppet Boarding House. I kind of miss it there," Zondra stated, but Zoot had a feeling she just wanted to spy on him and Dr. Teeth and possibly write about their relationship in fanfictions for some forum for the Muppets. [This is a nod to Muppet Central Forum!]

"I'm thinking of moving back in, too," Clifford said.

"Really? Great!" Lips said, smiling a little too excitedly. He realized the other Muppets were staring at him, wide-eyed, wondering why he was so excited about Clifford moving, which resulted in the trumpeter saying, "I mean, that's cool. Welcome." Lips could've sworn he heard Skeeter and Zondra snicker, but he decided to ignore it.

"Well guys, let's get started on getting you guys back up top!" Kermit said to the old Muppets, who cheered.

**Well, the next chapter is the epilogue! And I know, this is probably the first time anyone has shipped /Zoot and Clifford/Lips, but someone had to! **

**Zedd owns Lost at Sea**

**Avicii owns Hey Brother**

**Please Follow, Favorite, and/or Favorite!**


	19. EpilogueAnother Short One

**Okay, so this is the epilogue, which is a little shorter than all the chapters of the story...okay, so they're a lot shorter, but I couldn't think of what happened after the main story was over and what everyone was doing. Anyway, here's the epilogue!**

Things were good for the Muppets after the show. Since Zia was locked up in jail, Kermit didn't have to worry about offing any more of his friends, and now since the Offed Muppets had rejoined the group, the Muppet Show was now better than ever! A majority of the Offed Muppets still lived at the cave, but a few, like Spamela Hamderson and Seymour decided to go back to the boarding house to be closer to their friends.

After a few weeks of secretly dating, Dr. Teeth and Zoot had finally come out to their friends, which surprised few and was approved by many…of course, Zondra got into the habit of stalking them and discovered Muppet fan sites where she could post fanfiction about them, which a lot of people surprisingly liked!

After a few months, Lips had come out as gay, which, luckily, the Muppets were okay with, since they were supporters of GLAAD, and Janice was very accepting too, since Richard Hunt was gay. Then, by surprise, Clifford came out as bisexual, which surprised Rizzo and Pepe to the point when they were in shock and speechless and made Lips secretly happy. A month afterwards, Clifford ended up asking Lips out and the two have been a couple ever since, and Zondra started to keep track of their dates too.

Then, Fleet Scribbler found out about the gay relationships and started to post articles about it in his newspaper, the Daily Scandal, much to couples' dismay. It got so bad Zondra personally went down to the Daily Scandal and told off Fleet, which resulted in him getting a black eye and her getting locked up in a jail cell for the night, but Fleet got her message, and he never wrote an article about Dr. Teeth and Zoot's relationship or Clifford and Lips' relationship ever again. Kermit also took the liberty to tell the Daily Scandal to fire Fleet and convinced them that the articles were all lies, which he did so nobody would bother Dr. Teeth, Zoot, Clifford, or Lips.

Walter was impressed the girl had gone out and done such a bold thing to help her friends, and the Muppet eventually got a crush on her because he thought she was "so cool". After weeks of rejections, Zondra finally agreed to go out with Walter, which turned out a lot better than she had assumed. The Muppets were surprised Walter had decided to date Zondra of all the Muppet women in the house, but they were fine with it.

Things were going really well for the Muppets and they were even in the process of planning their next movie that would be somewhat based on how Walter met the Offed Muppets, leaving out a few details to make I more family friendly, much to Zondra's protest since all the details they left out were "the most awesome ones", which were also the ones involving the violence and that Dr. Teeth and Zoot ended up together, but after Kermit explained the consequences of leaving all the major details in it, some Muppet fans might have a problem with it, so he did it just to stay on the safe side.

With their movie to be released soon, the former Offed Muppets prepared to officially be back on the silver screen and to be loved and remembered by the fans once again. All was well for the Muppets, and it was going to stay that way.

**_The End_**

**Well, that's the end! I hope you enjoyed this story!**

**Please Follow, Favorite, and/or Review!**


End file.
